My True Identity
by A Midnights Dream
Summary: "T-Tsume." I plead. "It doesn't matter whether I'm a boy or a girl. I'm still the same person. Th-the fact that I'm a girl doesn't change anything." "You're wrong, Toboe." He growls. My breath hitches in my throat as he reaches up and brushes the flat digit of his thumb across my full lower lip. "…It changes everything."
1. Chapter 1

**-My True Identity-**

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

**I do not own, or take credit for, the artwork that I have decided to use as my cover. The artist, who I could not locate, retains all the credit for creating this dazzling piece of work. If you are the artist I'm sorry I could not ask for your permission properly**.

* * *

I forget how long we've been walking for now.

It seems like we've been just about everywhere since we've left the city: through raging dirt storms, through howling blizzards, across scalding desert sands. But I don't care. I keep telling myself I'm better off here than I would have been in that damned city.

_We're going to paradise._ _We're going to paradise. We're going to paradise_. I repeat like a mantra in my head. It keeps me going when I think my battered paws can't carry me any longer. It's a personal battle with myself. I'm constantly pushing myself farther than I did the previous day. I want to get stronger. I want to be strong like the other members of my pack. But even though I aim to please them so much, there's still one vital piece about me that I've kept hidden from them.

I'm a girl.

I know it seems like such a stupid and obvious thing to keep from your friends. But believe you me; I go to great lengths to hide the fact that I'm female. Although I appear smaller and more delicate I've tried to hide my form with baggy shirts and cargo pants. I know there's nothing I can do about my eyes or my hair, but I try to act like a boy to distract people from how girlishly soft my features are.

_But still_, you ask, _why hide the fact that you are a girl in the first place?_ Well, because being a wolf in this day and age is hard enough. But being a _girl_ wolf is even harder. First off we are not as common as male wolves; for every four males only one female is born. Second off, how do you think things would pan out for me round mating season? If I made the fact that I was female public then every male in a fifty mile radius would come running after me, forcing me to be his mate. And I did not want that. So to make things easier for myself, I decided to hide my true identity.

* * *

"C'mon, runt. Move it!" Hige calls over his shoulder for what I swear is the millionth time today.

"I'm…not a…runt." I protest through my wheezes. Jesus, why do we _always_ have to walk up the steepest hills? My arms are tired and my legs are tired. They feel like they are filled with sand and my lungs are caught in a vice. The sun is setting in the sky, making the heavens pink and yellow. We should be stopping soon, I hope.

Just then Kiba calls out and affirms my greatest desire. "We'll rest here for tonight. We'll continue in the morning."

I sink down on to my buttocks and let out a relieved sigh. Thank god. I don't think I can walk another step.

It's a forest we are in this time, and I have to say that I prefer it over the other landscapes that we've traversed. Darkness is clinging to the undersides of the low hanging boughs, making it appear later in the day than it really is. We hear the faint songs of birds in the trees somewhere, but other than that it is perfectly quiet, desolate even. After all, no animal in their right mind would linger in an area where a hungry wolf rests. It's very peaceful here…I yawn. I could just fall asleep…right..he-

"Hey, kid." An unhappy grunt sounds above me while the sole of a hard boot kicks my side. I lurch awake and bolt upright, expecting there to be some confrontation. But there is none. Kiba and Hige are resting in their wolf forms and Tsume is standing above me, scowling with hands on his hips.

"C'mon. We've been put in charge of finding food."

"Hunh?" The thought puzzles me. Not only is Tsume a capable hunter but he also prefers to hunt alone. So why do I have to go with him? When I voice my question, Tsume simply replies.

"Hell if I know. I'm just taking orders from _princess_ over there." He says sarcastically jabbing a thumb over his shoulder at Kiba. As usual, our stone faced leader doesn't make any indication that he's offended and makes no comment. "Well come or don't come. It doesn't matter to me." Tsume aptly grufs and saunters away into the thick forest brush ahead with his hands in his pockets.

"Ah! T-Tsume!" I scramble to me feet and bolt after him. "Wait for me!"

* * *

As usual I'm the one walking behind Tsume, feeling a little uncomfortable by the silence that envelopes us but at the same time not knowing what to say. Instead I decide to scan the area: my ears, eyes and nose open; looking for any signs of life.

All of a sudden, Tsume gruffs. "You know kid, I prefer to hunt alone. I don't need help from someone like you, so why don't you just beat it."

His words hurt sting me, but then I tell myself that Tsume doesn't mean it. Over the course of our journey I've learned that Tsume is no different than the rest of us. He just has a very brusque way of telling me how he feels. He's independent and wants to show us he's strong. I try not to take it personally and whine. "But Kiba said we should stay together. It'll be better that way."

"Fine, stay if you want." Tsume growls, irritated. "Just don't get in my way."

I come to a stop when I hear a faint rushing noise coming from my left. "Hunh…? What's that?" I raise my nose and sniff the air. It smells damp, like water. Without saying a word to Tsume I venture off into the direction the sound is coming from. I don't know if he's following me but somewhere deep down inside I hope he does.

The sound gets louder the faster I approach, and so does the moisture in the air. It's practically making my nose wet now. I burst through the line of trees and nearly stumble over the side of a bluff. I suck in my breath in surprise at what's on the other side of the trees.

"Whoa…" It looks like a river, but I've never seen a river so _big_ before. And the water; it's moving so fast that it looks all white instead of blue. The water thunders down over rocks and waterfalls, making it bulge in certain places. The roaring of the water is so loud it for some reason brings a smile to my face.

Something catches my attention near one of the small waterfalls. It looks like a small disk of silver shoots out of the water of the cascade, hangs in the air for a moment, then flops back down in the water. Several more disks do this.

"Are those…fish?" I ask myself, blinking in puzzlement.

"Hey!" And angry voice shouts behind me. I turn around and see Tsume panting slightly behind me. I feel a spark of electricity resonate through me just from his closeness. His golden eyes are hooded and a bit fierce. I feel my heart clench by how effortlessly good looking he is. _God he is such a powerful animal_, I think to myself looking up at him.

If I'm honest, I have to admit that I've always been attracted to Tsume a little bit. Whether he is in human form or wolf form he's got strong shoulders and wild, defiant golden eyes. And that scar on his chest…I often fantasize about how he might have gotten it. And his tight leather, mysterious, bad boy, tough guy look has always made me melt. "Why the hell did you run off like that?" He asks irritably and a bit breathless.

"Look Tsume!" I say excitedly, pointing to the salmon leaping out of the water. "There's fish! It'll be an easy meal!"

"You've gottah be crazy." He says. "I'm not going out there."

"Hunh? Why not?"

"Look, pup. If you wana go out there and risk your life for some fish, then be my guest. But you should know that those rocks are slippery as hell."

For some reason I feel the irresistible need to prove Tsume wrong. I'm not a pup any more, and he knows I hate it when he calls me that. _Stupid Tsume_, I growl internally. I'll show him that I'm just as capable a hunter as any of them, and that I'm not scared. "Fine. I will." I say tersely and leap over the side of the bluff to land on the banking below.

I glance back over my shoulder and see that Tsume is leaning back against a tree, his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed. _Good_, I think to myself, _he'll be here to see me prove him wrong._

I find some stepping stones that lead out into the water and decide to start there. I lean down on to my hands and revert to my wolf form. The rocks will be slippery and wet, so I figure four paws will be better than two. I eye up the distance between me and the first rock and, digging my claws into the fresh dirt, launch myself across the distance between myself and it. Thankfully this rock is not as slippery as I anticipated, so I stick my landing and let out a sigh of relief. I'm nowhere near the middle of the rapids though, so I decide to keep going. I cross two more rocks the same way until I am in the middle of the river. The rushing sound of the water envelopes me, making me feel like I'm the only one in this forest. I stare intently at the rushing water in front of me…waiting.

All of a sudden the scales of a fish flash in the sun light a moment before it leaps out of the water. I open my jaws, reach out, and close them quickly with a snap down on to the writhing mass of the fish. Ha! Take that Tsume! I _can_ do this. Satisfied with myself I savagely thrash my head from side to side, growling as I snap the fish's spinal cord. It goes limp and I sit back on my haunches and become human again. "Heeeeey! Tsumeeeee!" I call over the thundering rapids, holding the fish over my head. I turn and he is standing on the bank behind me watching impassively. "Look! I caught one! Haha!"

But instead of looking mildly irritated or indifferent, I see Tsume's face twist into an expression of horrified shock. Why is he looking at me that way? "Toboe! Run!" He yells, but I don't know why. Run from what? I hear a carnal growling sound from above my shoulder and without hesitation I leap forward just as a heavy paw comes crashing down on the rock where I just was. With my fish in my jaws, I turn to see what is behind me.

There, only three stones away from me, is a full grown brown bear with its muzzle rolled back over its long, yellow teeth. With a roar it swats its paw at me again in a warning. _These are my rapids._ I hear its animalistic voice resound in my ears. _Stay out of my way, wolf…_

I'm still immobilized by how close I came to being sent over the edge of the rapids. My limbs are frozen; my amber eyes are wide staring at the huge, furry mass of the brown bear in front of me. Even though the bear doesn't seem interested in chasing me, I still can't bring myself to turn my back on it and run. Tsume's voice snaps me out of my paralysis.

"Don't just stand there, you idiot! Get back here!"

And all of a sudden it is like I have control of my limbs again. He is so commanding and dominant. I think I could do just about anything if Tsume was the one who told me to do it. Clenching down on my fish I quickly hop over the rocks back to the banking. I revert to my human form as I'm about to leap to the last rock.

"Jeeze, what was that guy's proble-eheeehem!" I feel my world turn as my feet slip out from under me and suddenly I'm looking up into the sky. I let go of my fish and flail my arms trying to stay upright but it is no use. I stepped in a slick puddle of mud on the edge of the banking and I'm already falling towards the roaring rapids. I abandon all hope and clench my eyes shut waiting for the fall to be over. "Waaah!"

"Toboe!" Tsume cries out. Without any concern for himself, he lurches forward, wraps his arms around me, and falls backwards in an attempt to save me from falling to my doom. It works. With a thud we both fall backwards on to the ground, me landing on top of Tsume's chest.

I take a moment to recoil and I groan from the impact. I peek up at Tsume with an amber eye and expect him to push me off immediately and call me an idiot or chastise me. But he doesn't…for some reason…he's staring intently down at me. He looks like he _wants _to be angry, but underneath his sour expression is a hint of confusion.

I realize now that I must look like a mess: My hair is sticking to my face from the mists on the rapids, my lips are rosy from strangling that fish, and my clothes are all wrinkled and damp.

Suddenly feeling self conscious, I scratch the back of my head and try to act nonchalant. "Aha ha. Sorry Tsume. Boy I'm such a clutz. Thank you for saving me…" Secretly I love the feeling of lying there on top of his chest; of seeing him under me like this. I can feel the heat of his skin through my damp clothes and it ignites faint sparks under my skin and ruffles a school of butterflies in my gut. I roll off of him and keep my face down cast to hide my blush as I go to pick up my fish. "Whew. It's lucky that I didn't lose this guy over the waterfall, eh Tsume?" I ask, trying to put that whole uncomfortable moment with me and him behind us. But he is silent.

He is standing on his feet now, staring at me intently with his usual hooded gaze. "…Toboe." He gruffs softly. "Come here."

Again, I feel like my body is moving according to his will. As soon as he commands it, my limbs are moving of their own accord. _I swear, it's scary to think just what I 'm capable of doing for Tsume._ I do as I'm told and stand in front of Tsume, looking up at him with curious amber eyes. "What is it, Tsume?" I ask softly.

He is silent for a moment, leering down at me. I'm about to ask him again when he leans forward and asks. "…Are you hiding something from me?"

I feel my heart seize with panic. _Oh god, could he know? Was he able to smell my scent when we got close?_ I feel a bead of sweat form near my brow. "Uh n-no…" I mumble averting my gaze. His fingers grab me by my chin, making me look back up into his eyes and I gasp.

"…You're lying to me." He deduces.

_Shit. Oh crap, not good._ "I-I am not." I swat his hand away and go to step around him but he grabs me by my arm.

"Yeah right." He growls. Before I can even react or turn to look at him he grabs the hem of my shirt at both sides and pulls it apart. My eyes go wide in horror as I hear all the buttons _snap snap snap_ one after another…exposing my bound breasts and curves underneath.

The expression that registers on Tsume's face is complete shock. His golden eyes go round and his mouth forms into a small, gaping o. He takes a step back, as if he was expecting to see a flat chest and ridged features under my clothes. "It…can't be…"

I yell and hastily wrap my shirt around myself, covering my chest and curves. "Tsume!" I shrill outraged and now it is his turn to look totally submissive. "What's wrong with you!" By this point my face is as beat red as a cherry tomato and I can feel tears pooling at the corners of my eyes. That only happens when I'm extremely angry about something. "You don't just go tearing open a girl's-I-I mean a _person's_ shirt like that! What's the matter with you!" I choke down a sob, turn on my heel and book it as fast as I can back into the forest. I hear Tsume's voice call after me, but this time his commanding tone has no affect. Tsume may be stronger and more built than me, but I can out run him any day. I focus on my breathing and my anger to run as fast as I can. Soon Tsume's scent and the sound of his paws fade away behind me.

* * *

**So Tsume is a jerk. Nothing new there. But whoa-wait. Toboe is a giiiiirl?! I know it's weird but I got into this fic a while ago called **Mating, Killing, and Secrets **by **Zarakilover **and even though his/her story has a bit to be desired for character accuracy, spelling, and grammar; it was still a really awesome story that was interesting and…for lack of a better word good. His/Her story was the first I read that had Toboe as a girl and surprisingly I really likes it.**

**Unfortunately, it has been months and months since they have updated so I fear that we won't be seeing the conclusion to their story.**

**My first chap may be a little un eventful but trust me…our two favorite love birds will deffinately be seeing more action in the next chapter ;)**

**Review if you want more! Bye!**

**And now, an Excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_On 9/3/11 I had this dream that this gorgeous anime woman with long, midnight blue hair came down from outer space and she claimed to be my guardian.__She was born from a falling star and had star barrettes in her hair. Me, her, Death the Kid, and Free from Soul Eater went on a lot of adventures through the city fighting crime. Then all of a sudden the blue haired woman turned to attack me and out of nowhere this woman with long pink hair appeared in front of me and deflected the other's attack wither pink hair. It was magic…I guess. She called the blue woman out as being an imposter and said that she was my _real _guardian. Instead of being born from a shooting star she was born from the nebula. Together we all joined forces and beat the blue bitch's ass and ran her out of town._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	2. Chapter 2

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter two

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

I arrive back at the camp alone and out of breath. Both Kiba and Hige look up as I arrive.

"Hey." Hige comments. "Where's Tsume?"

_Hell if I care_._ He's a jerk._ "He uh…sent me away."

"Aaah well, what're you gonna do?" Hige whines, rolling back onto his stomach. "You try to give a guy help and what does it get ya? Just forget him, Toboe."

Kiba is looking at me with that expressionless face of his like he's privy to everything that's just transpired. It's unnerving. Trying to keep a low profile, I saunter away to the edge of the camp and rest my head on my front paws.

* * *

About two hours later Tsume returns with an impressive boar slung over his shoulder. Hige immediately leaps up anxiously and acts like Tsume is his best friend. "Alright, Tsume you're the best! Thanks man!"

"Yeah, whatever." Tsume says irritably. "Just make sure I get some, porky."

They dig in and after a while Kiba raises his head and calls out to me, concerned about my loss of appetite no doubt. "Toboe, you should eat."

I guess it's not just Tsume that holds sway over what I do. I suppose it is just my nature as an omega to want to please an alpha male. I reluctantly rise to my paws and meander over to the carcass of the boar. I keep my eyes down cast. The last thing I want to do is look _him_ in the eye.

After I fill my gut I join the circle where the rest of my pack has gathered. They are all resting with their eyes closed, and I know that they are all still awake. Their ears perk up and Tsume peeks a golden eye out at me as I rise to my paws.

"Dinner was great guys." I say, refusing to acknowledge Tsume directly for his kill. "I'm thirsty. I'm going to go drink from the stream…_alone_." I stress the last word, glaring at a particular steel grey wolf.

Tsume just closes his eye and mutters. "Just don't get lost, runt."

* * *

The water feels cool and refreshing as I wash it over my pale human-like face. I relish the silence that hangs over the babbling of the water. I was hoping to get a moment to think about what I should do about Tsume. But being alone and in a quiet place didn't make this subject any less uncomfortable or complicated.

And then he is there, behind me. I don't need to turn around and look to confirm that he is there, or that anybody is there for that matter. I can smell him and can practically feel his golden eyes burning a hole in the back of my skull.

I stay silent. Not because I want him to think I don't know he's there but because I have nothing I want to say to him at the given moment. I lower myself on to my hands and knees and drink from the running river while still in human form. I'm ignoring him, and he knows it.

"I think you owe me an explanation." His voice cuts through the forest silence like a kite bird flying in the night.

Calmly I stand and try to steel my nerves. Tsume has always been so intimidating to me. But now that he knows this vital piece of information about me…he could very well blackmail me with it if he wanted to. I turn and stare at him defiantly as I can. I want to make him think I'm not scared of him, but god that couldn't be further from the truth.

"I don't owe you anything, Tsume." I say, placing my hands on my hips. "If anything I think _you_ owe _me_ and apology."

"I'm sorry."

_Whoa, what? Did I just hear him correctly?_ I look up at him to gauge his expression, but nothing about him betrays that he is lying. _Holy shit, _I say to myself. _Tsume, I-never-apologize-to-anyone-for-anything Tsume just apologized to me! Wow…this is a first._ But if I was surprised then I was about to be shocked a second time, because he says it again.

"I'm sorry I…ya know…looked at ya."

"Yeah well…You should be." I say, wrapping my arms around me self consciously. "That was a really mean thing for you to do."

Tsume acts like he hasn't heard my last statement. "Ok, your turn." He says coolly walking down the bank to where I am. "Now start explaining."

My gaze drops down to my boots as he walks closer to me. I can't bring myself to look him in the eye. He stops in front of me and suddenly I feel very shy under his gaze. "Uhm…well…it's just-I felt like you guys would treat me differently if you knew I was a girl…so I just-"

"Why don't you cut the crap, Toboe." He growls and takes a step closer to me.

I take a step back.

"Why don't you tell me the _real_ reason why you've been lying to us all this time? And enough with the mistruths. I can tell when you're lying to me." He takes another step forward and likewise I take one back.

_Oh my god. God damn it._ I curse. _ Does he seriously not know? Do I have to spell it out for him? He can't figure it out on his own?_ My cheeks flush as I try to think about how to tell Tsume the truth. "…Come on Tsume, isn't it obvious?" I whine.

He blinks but otherwise his face is impassive. "Not to me."

"_Think_ about it, Tsume." I say exasperated, but he looks just as blank as before. I sigh exasperated. "Come on. I mean, i-if everyone knew I was a girl, then every male wolf around would try and f-f-"

"Fuck you?"

I'm speechless. He really said it, and with such a straight face too. I feel my face flush three different hues of red. My heart starts pounding in my chest. _Oh god, I do _not_ want to have this conversation with him-with Tsume of all people!_ "Y-yeah." I finally stammer. Oh god, the pressure is so intense I start twisting the hem of my shirt. "I-I've always hidden it. Not just from you, but from every one. I just…I don't want to be used."

I keep my gaze fixed to the steel toes of Tsume's leather boots. I feel too shy, too scared and nervous to look up at him. I'm waiting for him to say something, to start laughing at me and say he'll tell everyone. But he doesn't say anything. Cautiously I peek up at him and he is scowling down at me like he always is.

"You…" He growls and takes another step closer. "You're such an idiot, you know that?"

Hesitantly I take another step back. Eh? Of all the things I expected him to say…

"What makes you think you would be any safer out here than in the city come mating season? There's no place for you to run or hide out here."

"Well, it would have been the same way in the city." I argue, but again it is as if Tsume doesn't hear me.

"I don't care how good you think you are at fooling people…once you go into heat, Toboe all the baggy clothing in the world won't help you. Everyone will definitely know…you're a girl."

It could just be me, but I swear his voice is gravellier and more raw than usual when he says this to me. And his eyes, I feel like they are burning down on me so bright it seems as if they are glowing. He's glaring at me so intensely, it's uncomfortable.

"T-Tsume." I plead. "It doesn't matter whether I'm here with you guys, or in the city. Whether I'm a boy or a girl. I'm still the same person, I'll still be able to protect myself. Th-the fact that I'm a girl doesn't change anything." I take a step backwards and apparently it is my last. I feel my back bump up against the cold, rough bark of the tree and suddenly I am trapped. A large pine tree at my back, and a leering Tsume to my front. _Son of a bitch!_ I think, blinking my amber eyes. _He planned that, didn't he?_

"You're wrong, Toboe." Tsume says in response to my last statement. He takes another step closer so now there are only _inches_ separating us. My breath hitches in my throat as he reaches up and brushes the flat digit of his thumb across my full lower lip. "…It changes everything."

* * *

I'm stuck, immobilized by his un-Tsume-like advance. My breath is quivering and I feel the butterflies in my stomach do summersaults as his fingers leave my lips and trace down to my chin, and up my jaw. He is not looking at me. He's watching his fingers trace small patterns on top of my skin, as if he can't believe he's doing something like this either. Where ever his fingers touch me, I feel faint shivers and goose bumps rise up. _What is this I'm feeling?_ I think to myself.

"Ts…Tsume?" I ask breathlessly. It is barely even a whisper.

His hands leave my face and take a piece of my honey brown hair between his fingers. He rubs it between the pad of his thumb and forefinger, admiring how silky it is, I guess.

"You know…" He begins softly. "I always knew you were too pretty to be a boy." He leans his forearm on the trunk above my head and leans down so that our noses are nearly touching. That's it, I'm completely trapped. Mesmerized by his entrancing golden eyes, and pinned to the tree with no room left to escape…I can do nothing to stop him. "Your eyes are too big. And your lips…they're too…full." His voice get's heavier and softer the more he leans in to me.

I close my eyes in anticipation, and tilt my lips upward. Absently I remember the first time we met. He said he didn't want me around. He wanted me to leave. Then I remember the night in the cave, when that hungry wolf-killing machine was hunting us down in that ruined city. I was licking his wound when he shoved me away and told me to never touch him again. As dazzled as I am in this state, my mind-to-mouth filter suddenly malfunctions and doesn't register. "You said…never…to touch you again." I murmur, feeling his lips hovering over mine. Oh god it's so hot. I feel my lips brush against his as I speak they're so close. It makes something deep down inside me ache and heat up. It makes me start panting and want more.

Tsume looks at me like he hasn't a clue what I'm talking about. For a second, I kick myself for ruining the moment. But then the side of his mouth quirks up into a smirk and he chuckles.

"Oh yeah…" He says as if remembering. "I almost forgot. Heh, thanks for reminding me." In one swift motion he takes both of my wrists between just one of his hands and pins them above my head against the tree. I'm shocked. It seems like he always knows what to do to totally throw me off. If I thought I was trapped and helpless before—well now I'm _really_ screwed.

He's speaking again and this time his lips are brushing against the crook of my neck. I shiver from feeling his hot breath fall against my skin. "Keep your hands there, do you understand?" He growls and I dare not argue with him. Not when Tsume is like this.

I say nothing. I'm terrified, excited and aroused, all at the same time. It's like the butterflies in my stomach are clogging up my throat, preventing me from answering.

Tsume closes his golden eyes and traces the tip of his nose up the length of my neck and into my honey brown locks; all the while inhaling my scent deeply. A growl rumbles in his throat when his lips brush against the shell of my ear. "You smell good, Toboe…" He murmurs in a throaty voice, making my insides quiver and clench with longing.

I feel a blush stain my cheeks and I turn my face away slightly, embarrassed yet pleased. My fingers ache to run through his hair, to travel over his tanned skin, or to grip his arms. But I don't. I obediently hold them over my head as he commanded. I don't know why but I just can't bring myself to defy him, even if it is for my pleasure. I can't…disobey him.

All of a sudden Tsume pulls away from me leaving me leaning back against the tree totally flustered. He sticks his hands in his pockets and gazes out across the stream like he's trying to look anywhere but at me. His sudden change in behavior confuses me. Was it something I did? Did I turn him off? Did he realize how lanky, pale, and imperfect I am? "…Tsume." I call quietly.

A moment later, Kiba pads out of the forest brush in wolf form. His ears are pricked forward and it seems as if he's been looking for us. "There you two are." He says. "What's been taking you so long? I got worried."

"Tch. No need to worry about me, pretty boy." Tsume says, and then turns his hooded glare round towards me. "I was just…really thirsty…that's all."

_Really thirsty? Is he talking about me and what just happened?_ I blink my amber orbs.

"Besides." Tsume continues, turning around and making his way into the forest that Kiba had just come out from. "We all know that it's _Toboe_ that needs to be looked after. The damn kid's afraid of his own shadow."

My brows meet together in frustration and my mouth opens into an outraged o. How _dare_ he insult me like that when I just let him…! When I just-Gah! My face goes all red just thinking about it. "I am _not!_" I cry stomping my foot.

"Careful." Tsume teases and his mouth turns up into a wolfish smirk. "You just might attract a _bear_ with all that stomping around."

_That bitch! Oh no he didn't!_ But his tactic works on me. I find myself shivering at the idea of running into that bear again. I feel irritation sour my pretty face which only seems to delight Tsume further. Kiba quickly sees that there's nothing to be concerned about and starts heading back to the campsite with Tsume. Smoothing down my hair I follow them, resolving to sleep as far away from Tsume as I can.

The whole way back I make faces and rude gestures at Tsume behind his back.

* * *

**Aaahh, well I'm a bit more satisfied with this chap than the last one. At least we see some action in this one. I like keeping it short and I'm very entertained with this story. Don't know how I'll end it though…or if I will. Anyways, hope you like it and please review.**

**I mean, I realize that wolf's rain isn't as popular as some other animes; Even though it's an awesome series it's not very well known. And on top of that I'm writing about a side pairing that gets very little attention. That being said, any reviews I get are SO APPRICIATED you don't even know.**

**Remember****, Details people Details****, tell me why you liked it or where it was good**

Yep. Sounds good -.- **is a crappy review if I ever saw one. Chow.**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_So last night on 7/2/2012 I had this dream that I went to a school that was like a skyscraper thing and it had soooooooo many floors to it. But instead of there being stairs to get from one floor to another there were these giant McDonalds play tunnels that you would have to crawl up and they were all lumpy inside to aid with the climbing process. So I had this child compassion and understanding class ( :( no….just—no) and the way the teacher taught the class…when it came to be my turn…ok I can't write this part because it is so many levels of wrong and fucked up that I would seriously offend someone if I wrote it. All I can tell you is that she did sick things to me and the child in this giant bed and apparently she was a he and he/she made the entire class watch me and the child get violated…Like I said, if you think you're scarred from this try having the dream…it was so many levels of mortifying. I just wanted the ground to swallow me up and hide in there forever._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	3. Chapter 3

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter three

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

The next day we are up and walking again. A light snow has started to fall, temporarily covering this dirty, disgusting world in a fresh sheet of virgin-white snow.

I take up the rear of the pack, hoping to stay down wind. It is February, still a long ways from mating season, but I know that these days male wolves won't wait that long to get it on. And after my little run in with Tsume last night…Well, I can't be sure if I'm _in heat_ or not.

But I'm sure not going to take any chances.

Speaking of Tsume he's making me feel really confused. He hasn't looked my way once all day today and didn't say a word to me before we went to sleep last night; usually he bids me good night in his own terse kind of way. And this morning when I accidently brushed up against him he turned and snapped at me, baring his teeth and growling! That one hurt the most. I feel hurt and angry but most of all I feel confused: Why is he treating me like this? Is this his way of rejecting me? How does he even have the gall to act that way towards me when _he's_ the one who violated _me?_ Secretly, I hope he's acting this way towards me to keep a low profile and that maybe he likes me…I watch the back profile of Tsume's running wolf form and I sigh to myself. Who am I joking? Tsume is a loner. Always has been and always will be.

* * *

There's not much out here besides flat rolling planes and hills. We run all day without any confrontation. Finally, around sunset, the pack crests this gentle sloping hill. I of course am struggling to keep up like always and am left wondering what they are looking at as I make my clumsy ascent to stand with them.

There at the foot of the hills is a large dome-city— much like the one we've fled from. Only this one looks much better and well kept: The dome is perfectly intact, with no ruptures or cracks anywhere. The multi-colored neon lights that flash from the city's casinos and clubs underneath makes the dome appear as if it is changing colors constantly: from pink, to green, to blue, to yellow, and back again.

"Well whatta ya think, Kiba?" Hige asks beside me.

Kiba is facing forward, emotionless as always, and is silent for a few moments before he responds. "…The scent of the flower is coming from here. At the very least we pass through here and try to get some food, and maybe learn more about this noble who's stolen the flower maiden."

"Sounds good to me." Hige grins at the mention of food and dashes off in the direction of the city excited. "C'mon, let's go!"

"Hnn. This looks like it'll be interesting." Tsume comments to no one in particular.

I on the other hand don't say anything. I find the idea of going into this bustling city very unsettling. There's no telling if there will be any male wolves in there, and this place will be totally unfamiliar to me. I mean, I've lived in a city with male wolves before (obviously) but…Tsume did something to me last night. He _woke up my body_ in a way that I think will attract other male wolves. The thought deeply worries me. I feel my wolf ears come out while I'm still in human form and press down flat against my head.

"Hey kid." I hear Tsume call next to me. I look up and see that me and him are the only ones left standing on the hill. Kiba has taken off after Hige leaving us alone. He roughly grabs me by my arm and I gasp softly. His grip is like iron. "Stick close to me once we get in the city. Got it?" He growls into the shell of my ear.

_Hunh? Stick close to him—why? Could that mean…is he worried about me?_

"Answer me." He says and I find myself nodding my head dumbly like a robot. "Good. Now let's go." He releases me and without giving me a second glance races off after Kiba. I blink my amber orbs after him.

Tsume is such a confusing creature; One minute he's playful, and the next minute he's growling at me and acting like I have the plague…I really don't understand him.

* * *

We enter the city without confrontation. The streets and buildings here are very clean and I'm really impressed to see that hardly any of the buildings are run down or condemned. The city where I grew up was awful in comparison to this place. It's a good feeling, but at the same time I feel a little nervous. At least in Freeze City there was always a decrepit old building to hide or sleep in. But there's no place to hide here.

The streets are well lit and cast the dark side walks in an orange glow. We are standing in this large town square with a fountain in the middle of it. There are only a few stragglers here and there, but upon sight of us they quickly make themselves scarce. Now we can talk freely.

"Right, so what did you wanna do?" Hige asks Kiba. We all turn to him eagerly awaiting his verdict. He is quick to answer.

"Well it doesn't look like we'll be able to steal food that easily in this town. Spread out for now. I'm going to try and find out more information about the flower maiden and try to get a lead on that noble's scent. You guys feel free to look for a place for us to sleep, and try to scrap together a few dollars for food. Like I said, I don't think we're going to just _find_ food lying around here. So we'll have to buy it."

Tsume makes a condescending noise. "Yeah right: Get somebody else to do your slave work, buddy."

"Tsume…" I whine. He's doing it again. Why does he always _try_ to start something with Kiba?

"I've never worked a day in my life to get food. I'm a god damn wolf, for crying out loud—I take whatever I want. I have never, nor will I _ever_, work for a _human_." He is glaring straight into Kiba's blue orbs defiantly but as always, Kiba doesn't give in to Tsume's antics. He is calm and collected.

"That's fine." Kiba replies, his gaze never wavering from Tsume's. "Just don't get in the way of the others. Everyone has a place to serve in this pack. You just need to find that place."

"Yeah, whatever." Tsume sighs and begins to saunter towards a district with a red blinking light above the street's entrance.

_Do I follow him? Well, he did say to stick close to him but I don't want to cause suspicion by always sticking around hi-_

"Toboe." Kiba calls me and puts the brakes on my advance towards Tsume.

"Uh, yeah?"

"Why don't you try and find us some food? I bet you'd be good at that." The trace of a warm smile tugs at the corners of Kiba's mouth: a warm gesture that reaches all the way up to his clear blue eyes and makes them sparkle.

I smile back at Kiba. He's always been so nice to me. "Okay." He gives me confidence and _makes_ me feel like I can do things…that's more than I can say for the moody ice princess that's just skipped down to the red-light district. With a nod, I head down a well lit deserted street adjacent to the one Tsume went down.

"Hey, what gives?" I hear Hige whine to Kiba as I leave. "Why'd you give the runt the job of finding food: I coulduh done it just as well with my nose, you know." _Figures he would want the job with food in it…fatty._

I'm a good distance away, but I hear Kiba mutter the words "confidence" and "place in the pack". I absently wonder if Tsume will be mad that I didn't follow him. But then on second thought I stick my nose in the air and give a soft _hnf_ sound. _Let him be mad_, I say to myself. _It's not like he _owns_ me or anything. I can do whatever I want._

Further down the street I see a middle aged man standing in front of a theater with a neon sign over head that reads _Gypsy and Wags_. His brow is wrinkled with a worried look, and he's glancing up and down the sides of the street. Upon sight of me his face lights up in a genuine smile and he races up to me.

"Excuse me, miss!" He says excitedly.

'_Miss'? Is it really that obvious that I'm a girl? Oh well, no use in hiding it I suppose._ "Uhh yeah?"

"I was wondering if you could help me out: You see, we have a show going on tonight and one of our actresses has just called out sick. It's a very easy performance; there's no experience necessary and you don't have to worry about any lines."

I don't know what to say. Going into a club that I don't know in an unfamiliar city with none of my friends around to help me if I get in trouble sounds pretty risky … Besides, I'm supposed to be finding us food; I don't have time for this. "Rrrrrmmm." I make a face like I'm not interested.

"Did I mention that it's good pay? No commitment necessary and the tips are extraordinary…that is, if you can please the crowd. But you shouldn't have to worry about that. You have a very pretty face." He adds as a flattery factor no doubt.

At the sound of money my ear twitches. _Hnnnm…good pay. Kiba said he wanted me to get us some food. This would be a good way to make some quick money…And he _did_ say no commitment necessary; so afterwards I can just leave, right? Plus, it's a human theater. I don't need to worry about getting into trouble. I'll be just fine._ I feel confidence swell within me. _Besides, this sounds like the perfect opportunity to show Tsume that I'm not just a stupid pup; that I can be useful. _"Alright!" I say, clenching a fist in front of me. "I'll do it!"

* * *

He takes me through the back door of the establishment. Now we are in some sort of makeup room with lots of furry costumes and veils. There's a makeup mirror occupying one of the walls, with light bulbs all around the sides of it: just like you see in the movies. Various make up paraphernalia litters its surface.

The man crosses the room and knocks on a door with a star on it that reads _Hilda_.

"Hilda!" He calls and a cranky voice answers him on the other side. "I've found you a new co-star. Get her ready in costume and makeup; we're on in thirty!" He then turns and gives me a warm smile. "Good luck kid. You'll do fine." And then he makes his exit.

A moment later _Hilda's_ door opens and the image of a tall, curvy woman fills the door frame. She is tall, like I said before, and has dark brown hair that falls in tight ringlets around her shoulders. Her face is done in light makeup but her lips are coated with a thick layer of dark red lip stick and gloss. Her "_costume"_ doesn't really cover much of her body. Her sleek, tanned body is covered where it needs to be with a light periwinkle bikini and a veil-like loin cloth hangs from her hips to down past her knees. She has another veil on her face: over her nose like I've seen Indian exotic dancers wear. She has white cat ears pinned to her head and she does not look pleased to see me.

"Ugh." She says, eyeing me up and down. "We have got _a lot_ of work to do. And he only gives me thirty minutes? Tch, that slave driver." She mutters and puts out her cigarette in a dish. Without warning she comes over to me and yanks my shirt off by the shoulders: making the buttons snap off.

"Hey!" I yell covering myself.

"Quiet, noobie." She says tersely. "We've got thirty minutes to completely transform you into a total babe and I intend to use every second of it." As she talks she goes down on her knees, undoing the laces to my army boots and the button to my pants. She has them off in less than a minute. _Damn she's fast._

In the blink of an eye she pulls aside a periwinkle bikini costume much like the one she has on, complete with veils and brown furry ears and tail. My costume is embroidered with golden lace and silver beads.

She points over to the chair in front of the makeup station. "Sit." She commands and I obey. She looks at my amber brown eyes in the mirror. When my eyes connect with hers in the mirror the corners of her mouth quirk up into a smile. She takes my chin between her fingers and says. "You really do have a pretty face. You know if you want we can offer you a full time position here. Our other girl isn't nearly as pretty as you."

"U-uhm n-no thanks." I say hastily and apparently it is not the answer she wants to hear. Her beautiful face goes sour and her gaze leaves mine in the mirror.

"Hnf…as you wish."

We spend the next twenty minutes doing my hair and makeup. I stare in the mirror gaping. I can't believe how…how _good_ I look. I never realized how long my lashes were: they've been coated in black mascara and now a thick set of lashes frames my almond shaped amber eyes. My lids are dusted lightly with brown shimmery eye shadow, making my amber eyes _pop_. With those colors accenting my eyes my pale skin looks like it's practically glowing. And my lips—she's coated them with dark red lip stain like her own and has made them look plump and juicy by applying a coat of gloss over them.

"There." She sits back satisfied. "All done. Not bad if I say so myself…" Then she sighs and shakes her head. "It really is too bad that you don't want to work here…you would be very popular…Well" She stands. "You have ten minutes left to get into your costume." She points to the costume hanging up that she's left for me. "I'll be in my room if you need me." Her expression darkens for a moment. "You had _best_ be ready when they call us. I haven't been late for a show in ten years and I'm _not_ going to start today." I shiver under her hooded gaze, it momentarily reminding me of some one.

Once she is gone I take off my underwear and squirm into my costume. I wonder when the last time it's been washed and I shudder. I feel very self conscious in this thing: it's so not what I'm used to wearing. It's very revealing—I can see my own breasts for crying out loud! But I comfort myself in the fact that none of the guys will be here to see this, and that it's only a onetime thing. I take a deep breath and steel my nerves. _Stay calm, stay calm._ I repeat to myself.

I glance down at the fake ears and tail and I grimace. I revolt at the idea of having to put those disgusting things on my head. Then an idea hits me. Letting my glamour slip just a little bit I allow my wolf ears and tail to slip through the illusion. It feels weird, like I'm holding back a sneeze but I ignore it. It feels good to be able to flex my ears and wag my tail again.

"Not bad." I gasp and spin around from the sudden voice over my shoulder. Hilda is standing behind me with her hands on her hips and a bemused smile on her face. "C'mon kid. We're up."

* * *

Hilda ushers me through a door and it looks like we are standing on a stage with the curtain still drawn. I can hear lots of excited calls and whoops from the other side. Whatever kind of audience this is, they must be pretty excited to see this…err, performance. Then I hear that middle aged man's voice speaking over an intercom system to the audience:

"_Welcome back gentle man! February is the month of Saint Valentine; it is the natural month for love. And as such, we here at Gypsy and Wags have put a special show together for you. Now give it up for the ladies!"_

Wild cheering erupts and I'm suddenly intimidated by how big the crowd sounds. Smoke machines hiss at our ankles just as the velvet curtain begins to climb and booming music erupts from hidden speakers. I've never been inside a theater before…but somehow I thought it would be more…spacious? Organized? Quiet? Well lit?

The entire room is cast in dim lights, making it hard for even me to see clearly. There are ultraviolet lights shining above us, making our periwinkle colored bathing suits look like they're glowing. I can't see clearly but I see a lot of people—mainly men—crowding around the edge of the stage. Just the tops of their heads and eyes are visible, so I guess it must be a high stage. Two catwalks jut out from the main stage, and at the end of each is a polished golden pole…

Wait a second: Dark room, booming music, all male audience, poles. I suck in my breath and my eyes go wide as I suddenly realize. This isn't a _theater_. This is a…a… "Strip club."

* * *

**Oh no what's going to happen to poor Toboe? This was supposed to be one chapter but it was too long so I split it up. Find out what happens in chap four. And thanks to all of you who reviewed! There was one user who reviewed that I can't seem to get on the reviews page…it's so,ething with that new moderate reviews thing they have. But don't worry! I saw it –heart-**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_So a couple nights ago on 4/3/12 I had this dream that me and my stepdad were on this cruise ship/ hotel thing and we were having a good time. Then we were like 'ok, we wanna leave now' and like these guys in black suits with sunglasses were like 'you can't leave' (which now that I think about it makes since because we're in the middle of the frigging ocean. We _can't_ leave.)__But for some reason my stepdad and I were under the impression that they were keeping us here against our will so we devised a plan to escape. Then I guess the hotel oriented cruise ship turned into a spy agency and we had to dodge laser beams and race through slamming steel doors to escape. We even used spybots, tranquilizers and nerve gas like in Perfect Dark! Then we made it out on to the poopdeck (pffffft!) and were trapped and the guys were like 'There's no place to go now! Return to your rooms' but me and my stepdad were like fudge you guys! So then we turned into giant, yellow and orange, magical birds and flew away into the setting sun._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	4. Chapter 4

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter four

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

The word leaves my lips in a horrified whisper. My amber orbs glance around the room, looking for a way to escape, but I find none. Money or no money: I'm not this type of girl. I don't want to do this—

"_As you can see, we have our lovely Miss Hilda returning to us this evening. She's always pleasured to do business with you boys."_

As the man speaks Hilda struts over to her golden pole on the left side of the stage. The way she swings her long tan legs is slow, smooth and enticing. She appears so graceful even though all she's doing is walking. As she passes by she winks at some men and even blows one of them a kiss.

_Oh no, what am I gonna do? _ I panic watching Hilda twirling around her pole. The men all anxiously cry out and cheer her on. _ I can't do _that_! Oooh that old guy! He made it sound like this was some sort of play for crying out loud! I can't do something like this! What am I gonna do, what am I gonna—_

"_And to your right is Gypsy and Wag's new edition to our fluffy family."_Well, it's now or never. It's not like I can leave now so I might as well grin and bear it. As he talks, I try to walk as slow and as sexy as Hilda did down to my pole. I think the men are oogling at me, but they could just as well be holding back their laughs. It's hard to tell in this lack of light. Over the intercom the man continues._ "Brunette, young, supple, innocent: All these words flashed into my mind when I saw her passing me by on the street today. I simply had to share that experience with you gentleman so I begged her to make an appearance. The way she looks at you with those golden amber eyes will leave you completely breathless. Please give a warm welcome to…uh…to…"_

_Oh yeah. I never did tell him my name, did I? _I'm interested to see what name he's going to conjure up for me.

"_To miss _Caramel Lust!"

I nearly fall over backwards. _Caramel Lust? That's the stupidest, cheesiest stripper name I've ever-_

The crowd starts going wild letting out excited woops and cat calls. They like it?...Well, whatever floats their boat, I guess.

I suddenly feel very nervous. I don't know what to do, I've never worn clothes this revealing before much less dance on a pole! Desperate, I turn to Hilda, my wide amber eyes practically screaming _help me!_

She catches my attention and yells over the music. "Don't worry kid. Just go with the music. Look at what the other girls are doing."

Other girls? I glance around the rest of the club and see that there are other girls on similar stages. Similarly they are all wearing furry ears and tails. There is a decent amount of men clinging around their stages, but mine and Hilda's is by far the most popular. I guess she wasn't lying when she said she'd been here for ten years.

_Oh god_ I think to myself again. _I can't do this. _But I have to do this. I'm already in waist deep. The crowd calls out excitedly as I wrap my pale fingers around the pole. The music fades quiet for a moment and I take advantage of it and try to play _innocent_ as the man said earlier. Raising my brows and clinging to my pole I let my wolf ears droop. "Please be gentle with me, guys." I whine and god I feel like such a whore. "I'm new at this."

The men really seem to like this and instantly brandish five and one dollar bills for me. _Wow, could it really be that easy?_

"You got it, Kid. I'm tellin you," I hear Hilda shout beside me. "You were _made_ for this."

I feel a little bit of confidence flush through me. If all it took was that little line to get their money out…maybe there's hope for me yet. I want to try something. I stretch out my legs as I round my pole and strut over to the edge of the stage. Looking down on all of the heads of the men below me, I feel like I am their beautiful over lord and they are my subjugates. It's a very empowering feeling.

I lean back against my pole and arch my back against it, flexing my tight belly and accenting my supple breasts. Finally this earns me some fives, ones, and someone even threw a ten! _Alright, now we're talking. _

I glance over and see Hilda getting closer with the audience. She is on her knees and is allowing the men to stick money into the bottom half of her bikini…Oh this is so wrong. This isn't who I am at all. But do I chicken out and stay in my comfort zone or do I make myself uncomfortable and make this whole embarrassing shenanigan worthwhile? I huff out a sigh and lower myself on to my knees. My amber eyes scan the audience till I find the best looking customer of them all. _He must have the most money._ With a seductive smile, I beckon him with a long pale finger.

The man looks shocked, and quickly looks around himself to see that there is no one better looking around. He points to himself, raises his eyebrows and mouths _'me'?_

I slowly nod my head and proceed to run my fingers up and down my body until he arrives. This earns me a few more fives. _I can't believe I'm about to do this, god I don't want to, someone stop me._ I reach down and grab the man by his tie and swiftly pull him forward. I brush my fangs against the shell of his ear and whisper. "I really like tips, Mister."

The man looks as if his heart has ceased beating and he goes slack with a blissful look on his face. I can't be sure, but I think I've just made a new fan.

All of a sudden a chill settles on me. I don't know why, but I feel like someone is watching me…and I don't mean in the same way the customers are staring at me. I look up near the door—I don't know why I do—and my blood runs cold. There standing in the front entrance, with an outraged scowl on his face, is Tsume.

* * *

I feel a wave of unmentionable dread wash over me.

_Oh god, oh no. Oh Jesus, not here! _My amber eyes round in panic.

_That's it._ _I'm _done_ for. He's going to skin and eat me alive!_

"What's the mattah, shweetheart?" A man says below me, no doubt in concern to my horrified face. But I can't bring myself to look away from him.

Tsume's gritted scowl flattens into a tight line and I visibly see him inhale a deep breath. Oh god, he is _pissed._ He reaches into one of his pockets and produces his pair of midnight shades. He puts them on and begins stomping right towards the crowd.

Now my fight or flight instinct kicks in. Every nerve in my body is screaming to run away. _This man is a predator. He wants to hurt you. Run as far away from him as you can._ But I hold my ground. It makes my nerves feel like they're on fire. I can hear my heart pounding in my ears.

"Hey!"

I jump with a yelp and turn to see Hilda glaring at me.

"What's your problem? Get up and dance!"

I turn my gaze back to the crowd but I've lost him. He must be in the crowd somewhere and I can't find him. God I don't know which one is worse: Watching that blood curdling face of his as he advances slowly towards me or not knowing where he is but knowing only that he's hunting me down.

My heart is still racing as I stand to my feet. _Well, I better make this work for as long as I can._ _Seeing as how this will be the last night of my life…_With this in mind, I no longer feel like I have boundaries. _If I'm going to get killed by Tsume anyways why not go all out?_

I strut back to my pole. I go around it so that my back is facing the crowd. I squat down, arch my back out so that the underside of my sex is pressing against the pole and slowly stand up; my soft bikini padded folds hugging the pole slightly as I rise. This makes the guys go wild and they brandish fives and tens alike, holding it over their heads. I lower myself at the edge of the stage and tug down slightly on the elastic to my bikini bottom, exposing just the very top roots of my dark brown hair down there…but that's all it takes. The men stuff bill after bill under my elastic. Just as I thought, my rich customer from earlier stuffs _two_ twentys down there.

For a moment, I completely forget about Tsume. My brain is on some sort of high by doing all these things that I wouldn't normally do in a million years.

Then I find him. He's in the crowd, but he's not storming through it to tear me off the stage like I expected him to. He's just…_watching me._ The thought makes me self conscious. _Very _self conscious. I don't want Tsume to watch me do these things. '_But you'll let strange men you don't know watch you do these things?' _the other half of my mind reasons. Touché.

He thinks he can intimidate me? Well he's right. But I can show him that two can play at that game. I make sure our eyes are connected before I let my mouth twitch into a smirk, letting one of my fangs pop out. I close my eyes and let my hand travel up my flat belly to the clasp holding my top together in the front. Somehow, I effortlessly manage to unsnap it with one hand.

Tsume's mouth pops open.

_Ha! Take _that_ Tsume. _I can't believe it: For once _I've_ made Tsume completely speechless.

My top still hangs over my breasts, but it's the very idea that my top is undone that sets the crowd wild. I guess they are anticipating things are going to get wild now. I moan and run my fingers down the valley between my mounds and arch my back to show the crowd the undersides of my breasts.

"Yeah, that's what I like to see!" I hear a customer whoop near my side. An instant later a loud smack comes from my bottom and I yelp at the sharp pain that follows. One of them has just spanked me. I don't know why but that smack is like a bucket of cold water, snapping me out of my deranged tirade. _What am I doing? How on earth did I get here? _I start to panic. I think I've come in too far. _I don't want to be here…I wanna go home._

All of a sudden Tsume's scent is really close. I couldn't smell it before over all the cologne but now it's easy to tell exactly where he is. I look down and he's standing right behind the man who's just slapped me.

_Oh god no._

Tsume aptly reaches up and politely taps the man on his shoulder. Irritated, the man turns around and growls "Whazzit?"

A moment later Tsume's fist connects hard with the side of the man's face. The crowd inches away from the spectacle, and now me and Hilda are no longer the main show.

"Aaaagh!" The man cries in pain clutching his face. "You son of a bi-"

Tsume knocks him one again but before he can topple over he socks a really hard blow to his gut, all the while maintaining a deadly calm expression on his face.

"Hey!" Hilda cries out, probably upset that he's interrupting her show. "What's yer problem, buddy!" She turns her gaze towards me and asks. "Do you know this guy or something?" But I'm so dumbfounded I can't even speak.

"Yeah, why don't you get lost pal!" A few other customers growl and Tsume roughly shoves them back. His lip curls over one of his fangs in a snarl.

"I'm not your _pal_."

All of the men in his area surround Tsume and start jeering at him. The music stops playing and the illusion of the strip club is shattered. The mic makes horrible screeching noises as the middle aged man fumbles to bring it to his lips. _"N-now hey! Let's not fight in the bar, gentlemen!" _but his cries fall on deaf ears. If anything the fight only gets worse.

That's it, I can't stay here. Gripping my top together I spin around on my heel and run as fast as I can to the door behind the stage that leads to the dressing room.

* * *

In an adrenaline induced furry I race into the costume room and grab my normal clothes off the rack. Without thinking I pull on my pants, I tear off the veil from my hips in irritation as it gets in the way of my zipper. I don't even have enough time to put my boots on before Hilda slams open the backstage door. Out of everything that's happened tonight he looks the most shocked to see that I'm scrambling to put my clothes back on over my costume.

"Where are you going?" She cries.

"I'm sorry Hilda I-I just can't do this anymore." I sob and before she can stop me I open the door out on to the street and book it into the welcoming darkness.

* * *

I'm barefoot and topless on the streets of some foreign city. God, how did it ever get to be like this? I shrug my shirt on over my shoulders and press my head against the cold bricks of a building. _You know, I don't think I ever would have done any of this stuff if I hadn't left Freeze City._ I morbidly think to myself.

"Hey, baby." calls a voice behind me. I whirl around clutching my shirt close and know even before I see him that it isn't Tsume. He smells a little like him though and looks roughed up. _Could be one of the guys Tsume fought with? _But underneaththat faint trace of Tsume is an unmistakable scent…he's a male wolf. I must not have noticed it in all of the smells in the club.

"What do you want." I demand trying to steady my shaking voice. _Oh jeeze, not good. I'm in a dark alley way, half naked with a honry-hungry male wolf eyeing me. Crap._

"What do you think I want, sweetheart?" He says inching closer towards me, leering at me with hungry eyes. "C'mon: you and me—we'd make a great pair."

I take a step back and my back bumps into the unforgiving brick of the building. _Jesus, _I think. _Am I doomed to constantly be trapped by men like this?_

"No way." I say glaring at him. "I won't do it!"

"Well too bad, chicky." He growls looming over me.

Despite myself I start to tremble.

"Matin' isn't about what you want. You find each other, fuck, and then move on. That's how it is and how it's always been…but ya know." He reaches up and strokes my chin and I feel every inch of my skin crawl. "Depending on how good ya are I might just decide to keep ya."

_What's wrong with you!_ My mind is screaming at me. _Bite his frigging finger off! Run away!_ But I can't I'm so scared, I can't move.

"Hey asshole." I hear a voice growl at the mouth of the alley, momentarily stopping my attacker's advance.

_No…it can't be…why?_

Tsume stands at the end of the alley. He's standing directly under a street light, making him appear more sinister and darker than usual. Through the dark shadows that cling to him his golden eyes cut through the shadows, glowing with fury. "Get your paws off my girl. I won't say it again."

_Whoa, what?_

"Oh yeah?" The stranger growls. "Who the hell'er you? And just what the hell are you gonna do about it?"

I see a flash of steel grey and a moment later the mass of Tsume's wolf form collides with the brown one of the stranger. I scramble backwards against the building, trying to stay out of the way but I'm already flushed against it.

Loud snarling and growling sounds echo down the alley making the fight sound really loud. I cover my eyes and sob. I can't watch. If Tsume were to get hurt because of me…I…I

I hear one of them yowl in pain and I have to look. Tsume is standing over the brown wolf with his muzzle rolled over his gleaming fangs and his ears are flat against his head. His steel grey fur is standing on end, making him look gruesomely intimidating. The brown wolf scrambles to his feet and begins to retreat backwards.

"This is _my_ female." Tsume snarls with a snap and the other wolf bolts away whimpering.

"Whatever man! She's all yours woohoo hoo hoo!"

I can't help it. The other guy's sissy wailing noises elicit a giggle out of me.

Now in human form Tsume turns to me with that same awful scowl on his face he had the moment I saw him standing in the door way of the club. Immediately my giggling ceases.

"Just what the hell is so funny about any of this?" He yells, making me shrink down. "Do you have _any _idea the torment you put me through when you disappeared like that!" He continues, his voice rising.

I feel my cheeks sting from his rebuke and I can no longer look him in the eye. How could I think to try and defy Tsume like that? He was just worried about me."Gee I…I'm sorry Tsume."

"You're damn right you're sorry! Didn't I _tell you_ to stay close to me, Toboe? And then when I go out looking for you where do I find you? At a god damn STRIP CLUB!" He snarls and slams his fist hard against the side of the brick building.

"Well you don't have to yell at me Tsume!" I scream and feel tears spill down my cheeks. God damn it, I hate it when this happens. I'm not _sad_, I'm really pissed off. But immediately I see Tsume's face soften with shock.

"Toboe…" his voice is surprisingly soft.

I furiously wipe the tears from my cheeks away. "And since when am I your _girl_?"

Something about his demeanor has changed. Even though he calmly walks up to me with his hands in his pockets, I don't feel scared of him. His face is open and there is no trace of his usual irritated expression. "Are you saying that you wouldn't like to be?"

_Uuuuh…what? What did he just ask me?_ "Uhhm…well I…"All of a sudden it's like my brain is blank and I'm not angry anymore.

He looks down at me and makes a face. "I hate this makeup on you." He says and I gasp as he runs that thumb over my lips again and wipes away my lip stick.

_Oh god._

"You know, I saved your hide tonight: twice as a matter of fact."

I blink my amber eyes up at him. "…And?"

He smirks. "And, don't you think I deserve a little payback?"

_Whoa just what does that mean?_ "I…I guess so-"

The moment the words are out of my mouth his lips are over mine. The sound of a gasp gets lost inside his mouth. The warm feeling of his lips molding over mine: it makes that hot aching feeling happen inside me again and I'm completely lost. I moan and close my eyes, clinging on to his strong arms for dear life.

His tongue traces along my full lower lip and he growls. I feel his warm hands run up the sides of my curves slowly and it makes me gasp again. I want him to feel higher. I want him to—

"Mnnnn…"

His hand reaches up squeezes one of my breasts. "Aaah Tsume…" I say breathlessly.

This makes something inside of him snap. All of a sudden he his gripping me under my legs and he lifts me off the ground. He presses me against the wall and holds me in place with his hips. I feel his hard erection pressing against the inside of my thigh.

_Oh my._

He attacks my lips and I can do nothing but wrap my legs around him and whimper. If the throbbing coming from between his legs is anything to go by I think he really enjoys it when I do that. Pulling away from my mouth he does something very wolf-like and licks near the corners of my mouth submissively.

Well butter my ass and call me a biscuit: Tsume just did something submissive—_To me!_

He pulls away and stares into my amber orbs with such a carnal, animalistic hunger I'm suddenly afraid of what he might do: Afraid and excited.

"We should stop."He says, bringing the iron hammer down on my fragile hopes and dreams.

_No we don't. _My fuzzy brain pleads, but my mouth can't form the words._ We don't have to stop._

He puts me down and runs his fingers through his short hair, fixing it I guess. I must look like a catch: Smeared whore makeup, wrinkled red shirt hanging open, baggy pants sagging around my waist, hair tousled from our hot alley make out session.

"I know this is going to be hard to believe but dark alley sex isn't my kind of scene…" He reaches up and I feel that same electric spark ignite under my skin as he caresses my face. "Sorry but...I'm just not that kind of guy, Toboe." His hand falls back to his side and he starts heading to the mouth of the alley, his hands stuffed in his pockets. "Wipe that crap off your face and get dressed. I'll stand in front of the alley so no one comes down here."

I stare after him completely dumbfounded for the millionth time this evening. 'Not that kind of guy'? Sorry, but I was kind of under the impression that he _was_. Or maybe…I simply wanted him to be at that moment. I don't know how he manages to do it. It seems like just when I think I know Tsume, he does something like this that completely throws me for a loop. My brow is furrowed in puzzlement and for a moment I am motionless as a single question wracks my brain:

_Just what kind of guy are you, Tsume?_

* * *

**Hedo again! So what'dya think? You guys likey? I know this one is a bit longer than the rest but originally this and the previous chapter was all supposed to be one chapter! Yikes that would have been long! But in the end I think it worked out. I have to say I don't have any idea what to write about for chap five. If you guys want you can pm me a request and I'll write it. I'll be sure to give you credit. Or you can leave a request in a comment if you don't have an account.**

**Thanks for the help guys, your comments were the only thing that kept me going. Well…that and my current fascination with Wolf's Rain—but mostly your comments!**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams.**

_On 9/23/11 I had a dream that I went to a school with a whole bunch of dinosaurs for teachers. They seemed like those phony costume dinosaurs you see in kid shows or something. Anyway, I didn't do my homework so my English teacher (who was a brontosaurus) started whipping me through the air and said that he would eat me if I didn't do my homework next time but I was like "bitch, you're an herbivore". Then my dream changed and I was standing outside on the playground in a batman costume. For some reason my body had changed into a man as well…weird. So then this guy comes up to me and was like "Hey, my son's been having a pretty bad day and I was just wondering if you could go over there and say a few words to him because you're his favorite super hero." And I was like sure, I'll do that. But as I approach this guy's kid he doesn't get any bigger…if anything he just get smaller. By the time I make it over there the kids on the size of an action figure. So I pick him up so we can talk at eye level and he melts in my hand! And then the guys behind me and was like "Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you. My son is made of ice-cream."_

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**

**R.I.P Ice-cream kid.**


	5. Chapter 5

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter five

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

A short while later I emerge from the alley way completely dressed. I've tossed that disgusting bikini costume in the dumpster where it belongs and have tried to wipe all the makeup off my face. But no matter how hard I try there's always _some_ glitter left over. I sigh. I just hope no one notices…

I walk up beside Tsume with my eyes downcast. I'm embarrassed on so many levels I can't bring myself to look at him. I don't say anything to Tsume, and he doesn't say anything to me—he just scans me up and down behind his shades, and then dips his head and starts walking back to the square.

I follow behind him, my dirty stripper money weighing heavy in my pocket.

* * *

Kiba and Hige are waiting for us at the fountain when we arrive.

"Hey runt, why so glum?" Hige innocently inquires when he sees me arrive, but I remain quiet. I'm not about to relive my embarrassing experiences with _him_ of all people.

"Did you manage to get any money for food?" Kiba asks after he sees that I'm not going to answer.

I nod my head.

"How much?"

"Uhhh….let's see…two hundred and fifty dollars."

"What!" Hige and Tsume cry in unison. Kiba looks silently dumbfounded. I mentally take a photograph of his gaping face, thinking that this will be the only time I'll see an emotion out of him.

"Where the hell did you get that kind of money?" Hige demands and suddenly his brows furrow. "Wait…are you…are you wearing _eye shadow?_"

I feel my face turn beat red and I look away. "N-no."

"Aaah god, you reek like a bar. Just what kind of job did you _do_?"

"I-I really don't want to talk about how I got this money, you guys..."I mumble. _Oh god _please_ just let this one go…_

The silent air of the night shatters as Hige throws his head back and guffaws. He's laughing so hard he's even hugging his sides. I grit my teeth and clench my fists in annoyance.

"Ahahahahaha! Aha! You! Can't be serious!" He gasps through his laughs. He's actually rolling around on the ground now. "You had to work the corner just to get us food money! Pppppaaaaaah ha ha!"

"I did not!" I yell over his laughing but it does nothing to quell his humor. God I'm so mad I just want to hit him in his stupid mouth. My stomach is all hot and it starts knotting in anger. I hate being picked on, but I know there's nothing I can do about it because I'm weaker than he is…

"Leave him alone, Hige." Tsume gruffs and the large one's laughing falls quiet.

For the first time since the alley I look up at Tsume with wide amber eyes. But Tsume's gaze is fixed forward on Hige and he's refusing to look at me. _Did he just stick up for me?_

"Aha aaaaah, sorry kid. I was only playin around." He says wiping a tear from his eye.

I place my hands on my hips and stick my nose in the air with an 'hmph': a very girly thing for me to do.

"We'll eat where ever you want, Toboe." Kiba's smooth voice interjects. "You were the one who made us the money, so you get to choose."

I'm shocked. If anything else, I feel confused. I've never had the option of choosing what I want to eat before. Granny fed me whatever she could afford for most of my life, and since I've been on my own…well, like I said, I didn't really have a _choice_ of what I could eat. And with this amount of change in my pocket, I realize I can eat anything I want, any_where_ I want. My mouth starts watering at the possibilities. All of a sudden an idea strikes me.

"I've got it! I know just where we can eat!"

* * *

"This is where you wanna eat?" Tsume asks, one hand on his hip and an eyebrow cocked suspiciously.

The sounds of a Friday night crowd buzz around us, mixing tastefully with the late eighties rock music that's playing over head. It's a bit dim in here, but nothing like the previous…_establishment_…I was in. Waitresses can constantly be seen walking to and from the kitchen, balancing trays of flaming entrées and stacks of dishes alike. I can hear laughing and clacking noises coming over from the area with the pool table. This restaurant is furnished with hardwood booths and stools. For some reason, I really like this place.

I spin around on my heel and don't even try to hide the look of excitement on my face from the guys.

"C'mon guys! This place is called the 'Thirsty Turtle' and the rats outside told me that this place is really popular. And you know what? This place is a _tavern_. I've never been to a tavern before, but I think-"

"Uggh, enough already. For god's sake Toboe, sometimes you babble like a chick." Hige whines.

My pretty face instantly goes sour with an irritated expression. Ever since I've met Hige all he's done is pick on me. If we weren't in the same pack I'd tell him to take a hike.

I open my mouth to make a retort when we hear a small feminine voice _'ehem'_ in front of us.

"Good evening." A petite waitress with black hair greets us. "Are the four of you together?"

"Uh…yeah." I say in a small voice.

"Alright then." She beams and quickly glances at her clipboard. "Oooo, unfortunately we don't have a table big enough right now for all four of you. So it'll be a little while. But if you want we have two smaller tables available that seat two people. Would you mind that?"

"Sure, I don't mind at all!" I say eagerly. This lady is so nice and I'm starving, I don't care if I have to sit at a smaller table.

"Great." The waitress says and grabs two menus from the podium. "If two of you would follow me this way, please."

I start to follow her and before either Kiba or Hige can move an inch Tsume shrugs past them with his hands in his pockets. His is gaze set forward and his eyes are unreadable behind his midnight glasses.

I glance over my shoulder and see Kiba and Hige being tended to by another waitress. _That was kind of assertive of him_, I think to myself. But then I quickly dismiss it with a shake of my head. _Honestly, Toboe, you over think everything._

The waitress seats us at a two person booth and hands us the menus. "Can I start you off with a couple of drinks?" She asks, her hand poised with a pen over a pad of paper.

The question throws me off guard. What else would I drink besides water? "Uuuuurrmm-"

"I'll have a Gin and Tonic on the rocks and the kid here will have a root beer." Tsume gruffs with his arms folded over his chest. He doesn't even glance the waitress's way as she jots down the information.

"Coming right up! I'll let you two decide while I'm gone." And with that she departs.

Decide? Decide on what? Oh right, our orders. I feel a little silly for not realizing it right away but hey, it's not like I've ever been in a restaurant before. I pick up my menu and my amber eyes quickly scan the lines of text…

Crap. I forgot. I'm a wolf—I can't read. Again I feel silly for not thinking this far ahead. I have no choice but to rely on the pictures of food scattered through the pages. I peek at Tsume over the top of my menu. His menu lays folded on the table in front of him and his arms are still crossed.

"…Aren't you going to look at your menu, Tsume?" I ask him. I still haven't asked him why he was so quietly adamant about sitting with me.

"I already know what I want." He gruffs.

"…What do you want?" I ask a bit breathlessly when I see he's not going to elaborate.

The corner of his mouth quirks up into a smirk and he says "Steak. They've got it at all of these damn human restaurants." He grunts as he lifts his legs and rests his steel embedded boots on the booth beside me.

For the first time since we've been seated I am reminded of how physically close we are. The sudden proximity of him makes my skin crinkle with goose bumps.

Our waitress has soundlessly reappeared next to us and places a tall glass filled with a brown bubbly liquid in front of me.

"Do you know what you'll have to order?" She asks with her signature smile.

"I'll have the house steak." Tsume gruffs and the waitress truns her big brown eyes over to me when she's done jotting it down.

"Uuuh I-I'll have what he's having." I say in a rush, feeling pressured. Hey, steak sounds like heaven to someone that's survived off of eating garbage. Literally.

With a nod of her head she collects our menus and leaves us.

My amber eyes scan the restaurant for Kiba and Hige, but I can't find them. Instead I see two very well endowed, beautiful women eyeing Tsume up like he's a delicious piece of fruit. And it's not just them. I see a couple other girls around the restaurant doing the same thing.

My eyes drop to my lap and I clench my fists. _If they made a move on Tsume I wouldn't even stand a chance. I mean, besides the fact that I'm in boys clothing I'm not much to look at: I'm not curvy, or tall, or busty..._ Long days of traveling have made me lean and my breasts are smaller as a result. Even though they are just humans, I feel a jealousy towards them that I cannot fully comprehend.

_I'd like to see _them_ live their entire lives in hiding, to see them cover up everything that makes them feminine: maybe then they wouldn't be so—_

"Hey kid." Tsume says and snaps me out of my spiraling thoughts. "What's that look for?"

I pout and avert my amber eyes. "…Don't you even notice?" I ask softly, my brow furrowing from irritation a little bit.

"Notice what?"

"Those women over there; all those girls…they look like they want to eat you alive. And…they're all so good looking…I don't know why you even bother with m-"

"Toboe." Tsume rebukes and when I look up to meet his gaze he is glaring at me. "Do you have _any _idea the things I would do to you on this table if we were alone in this restaurant?"

My jaw pops open and I'm completely speechless. _What did he just say?_ I feel my face flush a bright red and Tsume grins as a result. I…I don't even know what to say to that.

"I-I…I gottah go to the bathroom!" I scramble out of my seat and start walking to the back of the establishment where I smell the hand soap. As I go I can practically _feel_ Tsume's golden eyes burning a hole in my back. Gosh I…I don't even know if I _have_ to go to the bathroom, I just need some space and time to process what he just said.

I'm approaching the back side of a booth that is next to the bathroom's hallway when I hear a familiar voice talking. It's Kiba's. Through the clamor I hear him utter my name and I decide to linger a bit longer. Hunching down I press myself against the back of the booth and strain my ears to listen.

"Yeah, what about him?" I hear Hige reply and take a bite of his meal.

"I dunno…he's just acting really…weird around Tsume lately."

"Yeah, so what? Those guys have always been together since the day we met'em. They're like me and you, you know?"

"Yeah I guess…Hige?"

"Mmmf."

"Can I ask you something? It might sound a little weird…"

"Sure, shoot." Hige starts gulping his drink.

"…Do you think there's a chance that…Toboe is a girl?"

_Oh no…_

I hear Hige sputter out his drink and then beat on his chest while he chokes. "Are you out of your mind?" He asks once he catches his breath. "No way! If he's a girl, then _I'm_ Queen Latifah."

"Who?"

"You know, Queen Latifah: Actress from the 2000's, African American, busty..."

"…"

"C'mon Kiba, She was in _Bringin' Down the House._"

"…"

"Tch, you don't watch enough movies, man."

Seeing that their conversation was steering away from me, I quietly started to creep away to the bathrooms. _Wheew…that was close…too close_

* * *

"Well, I gottah tell ya." Hige begins, surveying our small motel room with his hands on his hips. "This place is one helluhva crap heap. But I guess it's better than sleepin on the streets." He shrugs and then flops down on one of the two twin beds that occupy the room.

As much as I want to disagree with him I can't deny he is right. Even with all the money I made, this one-half star of a motel is all I can afford. The walls were white at some point (I assume) but now they are a dirty off-white color. Plaster is flaking off from the walls and it is obvious from the ugly brown water stains on the ceiling that this place leeks when it rains. Not only that, but the window is open and is stuck there, meaning all the frigid winter air is blowing into our room.

Even though this place _is_ a total crap heap I'm sick of hearing Hige pick on me, complain and being so negative to me. I want to tell Hige to shut his trap and be grateful to me for even getting us this room. So I think I will.

"Well maybe we coulduh gotten a better room if you hadn't eaten so much, Hige." I protest crossing my arms in front of me.

"Hey don't go blaming me." He argues. "It's been weeks since we've eaten anything. I was starving, okay?"

I roll my eyes, suddenly fed up with this argument and quickly change the subject. "So did you find out anything about the lunar flower, Kiba?"

Our leader takes a seat on the bed next to Hige and rests his elbows on his knees. "I found out that this place is called Delearium. Apparently they are the leading exporters for oil fuel—the same fuel that noble's use to fill their ships."

"Aaah, well that would explain why this place is so clean." I say. I thought it was exceedingly odd to see a town doing so well in this day and age.

Kiba nods his head. "From what I can put together, this noble must have stopped here to get fuel for his ship. The oil technicians told me he was heading west."

"Wow, how did you get them to tell you that, Kiba?" I asked all wide eyed and impressed.

He is silent for a moment, almost as if he is pondering how to answer my question, then he says. "…I have my ways…"

Tsume makes a noise behind me. "Pfft, yeah right."

"It's getting late." Kiba says, ignoring Tsume once again. "We should get some rest. We rise with the sun tomorrow."

He rises and without even having to ask, Hige moves over and makes room for him. They revert to wolf form to take up less space and sleep closely to each other. Hige whines submissively and scoots a little bit closer to Kiba because their bed is closest to the window and it's really cold.

I look over at Tsume and before I even voice my question he growls. "Forget it. I don't sleep in beds. _Ever_. I'm not some soft, weak _house pet_."

Despite everything that he's said and done tonight his words still sting me. After what he said to me in the restaurant tonight, I would think that he would _jump_ at the chance to sleep in a bed with me…I guess I was wrong though. For the first time I think maybe that's all he wants me for: is to have his _fun_ with me whenever he feels like it and then treat me like trash the rest of the time. It makes me really pissed off.

"…Well fine then."I snap and flop down on the bed with my back facing him. I'm removing my army boots when I hear Tsume gruff.

"I'm gonna step outside. I need some air. This damn place reeks." I hear the door open and click shut.

_Fine, go outside and get a cold. See if I care. Stupid Tsume…_As I lay down and pull the covers over me I suddenly realize how tired I am. But of course I'm tired, I've had a long day: It's ten thirty at night and I've been running all day, have been tricked into being a stripper, had nearly been raped in an alley way, _made out_ in an alley way, stuffed my gullet and am now laying down on a cushy, soft…bed…

I know I should be mad at Tsume. Say he's a jerk and put him out of my mind. Say _oh well, more room for me._ But I can't deny the twinge of disappointment I felt inside of me when he didn't climb into bed with me like Kiba did with Hige. _Stupid Tsume…_I say again. _Stupid, stupid, Tsume…_

* * *

I had a really weird dream last night. It was one of those dreams where when you think about it later and you get all confused because you're not sure if it was really a dream or not. Like, _did that actually happen or was that just a dream?_

I remember waking up in my dream when I heard the door to our room open. Sluggish with sleep, I casted my glance over my shoulder and saw Tsume's silhouette standing in the doorway to the well lit hallway. He closed the door and padded over to the side of my bed. I felt the bed sag down beside me as he climbed in next to me.

"Mmmnn…Tsume…" I said all breathless and tired.

"Shut up, Toboe." He growled in as low a whisper as he could muster. "Just shut up."

My omega blood kicks in and instantly makes my mouth clam up. _What is he doing? Why is he getting into bed with me? He said he didn't want to. Was he lying? He wouldn't…try...anything…_My eyelids suddenly feel extremely heavy and they roll close. I'm nearly asleep, but I feel a pair of warm, strong arms wrap around me and pull me against a flat chest that is both warm and cold.

Have you ever been so tired that you can't speak or move but you can still hear? Well, that's what I was like at that moment. I felt Tsume let out a sigh into my honey brown hair. "Haaa…Toboe…" He whispers in a voice I've never heard him use before. I don't think he knows I'm still awake. "Honestly, you're so much damn trouble…what the hell am I going to do with you…?" Then, he does something very _un_-Tsume like and snuggles the tip of his nose into my hair behind my ear. "I think I've got it for you kid…really bad."

The next morning I woke with a start, sitting bolt upright in my bed. I glance over beside me but there is no one there. Kiba and Hige are still sound asleep on the other bed and Tsume is leaning against the wall beside my bed with his eyes closed. I run my fingers over the sheets next to me…they are cold.

I know. Like I said…It was just a crazy dream…

* * *

**Hey again. I'm sorry this chap wasn't very eventful but you know it was one of those things that are dry but necessary. Anyway, next chap will be more actiony, so please keep reading. And thanks to ChocoPokkin and S.S Wolfe for the encouragement. And also to the rest of the people that reviewed. It all really helps me, guys. Still kind of stuck though, so if you have any ideas that you think will go well with the story comment, review or pm me with your idea and I'll give you credit. Chow!**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_On 7/8/12 I had this dream that I was inside this big institutional building and all the hallways inside of it were empty and filled with water and ocean creatures. There were all these colorful fish swimming around and there was like a whole coral reef ecosystem. There were frigging sharks in there too! The whole building was like this fancy public pool to swim in and everybody liked going there because there were these small boxes you would clip to your hip that had oxygen in them and they were hooked up to your nose so you could bresth under water for a really long time. Well anyway, one of the sharks started eating people so the owners of the building employed me, an ex-C.I.A agent, to take it down. So I swam around for a bit until I found the shark and for some weird reason I wasn't scared of it. It rushed at me with its gaping jaws but I ducked down out of the way just in time. It kept going and crashed into the wall behind me. Once it was stunned, I did a spin attack to its underbelly, like in skyward sword, and killed it. When I came out every one wanted my autograph and I was an awesome hero/celebrity._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day…**


	6. Chapter 6

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter six

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

We wake very early the next morning. I guess Kiba wasn't joking when he said we'd rise with the sun. By the time the sun peaks its head over the horizon we've already left the city and have put a good three miles behind us. My amber eyes flick up to look at Tsume's back profile.

I can't stop thinking about that dream I had last night and how much I wish that it was real.

_I think I've got it for you kid…really bad._

That's all I've wanted to hear him say since he came on to me in those woods three days ago. I don't think I've ever wanted something this badly before. I don't know what it is about Tsume but I'm drawn to him like I see moths drawn to a naked bulb. Even though he burns me…I just…I don't know. It's like I can't stay away.

The snow crunches under our feet as we run…and run, and run. There is this black line of trees sitting on the west horizon which we are running towards. I don't know why but the wind that is blowing from that direction smells really ominous. It gives me the willies.

It takes us only a couple hours to close the distance between ourselves and this forest. My bad feeling doesn't go away: it only gets worse. The trees look taller than I imagined them to be and dark, heavy shadows cling to the underbrush. For some reason we've all stopped and are just staring into the forest. It's apparent that we all feel uneasy about this place.

"This place reeks of other wolves." Hige says, cramming his sensitive nose into the crook of his elbow. "There's gottah be at least fifty of them here."

"Do you think it's a good idea for us to go through here, Kiba?" I ask, concern evident in my voice.

Kiba's blue eyes are set forward gazing into the dark woods as if pondering his answer. All of a sudden his head perks up and he spins around on his heel, facing a large bolder in the opposite direction.

"What is it, Kiba?" I whisper.

"We've got company." Maybe it is just my imagination, but I think I feel Tsume inch closer to me after Kiba says this. "We know you're over there. Show yourself." Our leader calls over to the enormous rock.

"Haaa…Well, I suppose there's no use in hiding now." An unexpectedly feminine voice sighs and we all go slack with surprise.

Around the side of the rock….appears the small, lithe form of a female wolf.

* * *

At first, we are all just stunned to see a female. Honestly, we are like _rare. _She is in human form, but we can all tell by her scent that she is a wolf. She has a heart-shaped, pale face and almond shaped red eyes rest upon her high cheek bones. She has short pink hair and—whoa, wait: Pink? I'm flabbergasted. It's just such…such a _weird _irregular color for hair. But I suppose that when wolf's project their illusions they can make themselves look however they want (to some degree). I mean, look at Kiba: He's a white wolf and yet his human form has a brown mane…

Anyway, she is wearing a tight, long sleeve jacket that cuts off well above her mid-drift and her bottom half is covered with tight jeans. I think she is wearing heeled boots but I can't be sure…

"Who are you?" Kiba demands.

"My, my." She smirks, touching a finger to her full lower lip. "How rude. You come into _my_ territory, uninvited and unannounced, and demand to know _my_ name?" She shakes her head and clucks her tongue. "No manners at all."

"Your territory?" Hige echoes. His cheeks are dusted with a light flush and his eyes look like they're going to pop out of his head. I roll my eyes. Well, there's Hige for you: at the first sign of a pretty girl he's gone.

But he does raise a good question: a female claiming territory? It's practically unheard of. First her appearance, then her pink hair, now this? She certainly is irregular.

She nods her head and her grin broadens…there's something not right about her expression. "Yes. My father was the top alpha of these woods." She places the back of her hand to her forehead and swoons dramatically. "It's tragic to say, but my father passed away a short while ago. So now I—his sole heir— have inherited these grounds." She lowers her hand and her expression goes flat. "So now speak your business in my woods or you'll have to answer to my betas."

Four grey wolves pad out from behind the rock. Their gate is slow and menacing and their golden eyes are fixed upon us in a diligent glare. They're not fooling around here.

I feel my wolf ears pop out from my glamour and flatten submissively on to my head. I shrink backwards and glance over at Tsume, but he is not looking at me. He's giving those wolves the nastiest glare he can muster. Even _I _have to look away it's so intense.

Kiba hasn't budged and is staring the female alpha straight in the eye. He does not look intimidated in the slightest. I guess it must be an alpha thing…

"My name is Kiba. My pack and I need to pass through here. That's all."

She nods and turns her red gaze on to Hige, signaling his turn to speak.

Hige is only too eager to introduce himself. "Oh me? I'm Hige – and single too, by the way." He adds with his characteristic goofy smile to which the female rolls her eyes. She clearly isn't interested in Hige.

Her red eyes shift over to Tsume next and suddenly her mouth quirks up into an amused smirk. "Well now." She says with interest, padding closer to our pack. Her betas make a move forward to escort her but she stills them with a wave of her hand. All the while she never takes her eyes off of Tsume. The way she's looking at him…it's just like those women in the restaurant. I feel a foreign, ugly form of anger in my chest that I can only describe as jealousy. For the first time in my passive, submissive omega life…I feel the need to exert ownership of something.

She is standing right in front of Tsume now, that weird smile still clinging to her lips.

Tsume has his shades on, so I can't tell if he's looking at her of he's just looking straight ahead. But either way he doesn't seem too interested in her presence at all. He merely stands there looking forward with his hand on his hip.

"…And who are you?" She coos when Tsume refuses to answer. "…Well?"

"Sorry," he gruffs. "But I don't just give my name out to random strangers."

The female looks totally taken aback that he's said this. I don't think she's used to not getting what she wants.

_Tsume, be careful._ I plead inwardly.

She shakes her head to rid it of the slightly shocked expression and replaces it with her playful smirk again. "Oh come now, we're not really _strangers_. My name is Mai-Ren. But you may call me Mai, if you like." She purrs, taking a step closer leaving only inches between them.

I feel my stomach clench tight from anger and my hands squeeze into fists. I don't like her getting close to Tsume like that. And I don't like her _looking _at him like that either.

"Watch it." Tsume growls, his lip curling back over one of his fangs. "I'm getting pissed off."

Despite Tsume's warning she runs a slender finger over the leather collar of his jacket suggestively. "Come now, won't you tell me your name?" She whines. "I've told you mine-"

"He said he doesn't _want_ to." I snap and as soon as the words leave my mouth I regret saying them. Mai's head snaps in my direction, her red eyes wide with a mixture of surprise and furry. It is obvious from the way she is scanning me up and down that she's just noticing I'm standing here. Her brows crinkle for a moment in confusion then…an all knowing grin pulls at both corners of her mouth. I feel my stomach drop.

Tsume forgotten, she walks over in front of me and leers down at me with those menacing red eyes of hers. Her tone is condescending.

"Well now. What have we here?"

I clench my fists and stare hard at the ground, ready to be abused. I've been picked on enough times to know when an insult is coming my way. It's my nature as an omega wolf to just sit here…and take it. I gasp as I feel her cold fingers pinch my chin in a painful grasp, forcing me to look up into her mocking red gaze.

"It's odd that I should find someone like _you_ so close to _my_ territory." She growls out the last word and digs her nails into my skin particularly hard as if to emphasize her point.

"Aaah…"

"Toboe…What is she talking about?" Hige asks, his brow furrowed in confusion.

Mai's face blossoms into an expression of amused shock. "Oooh? They don't know? Could it be that you've been _hiding _what you are?"

_Oh god. She knows. I don't know how she figured it out, but she definitely knows. _The sudden realization that she's going to reveal my secret makes my arms and legs heavy with dread. My amber orbs are wide and pleading but she only seems to take grotesque amusement out of my terror. "Please…don't…" I plead. My voice is barely a whimper. _This is it. She's going to announce right here, in front of all these hungry males, that I'm female. And there's nothing I can do to stop her._

"Could they not know that you're a g-"

"You shut your mouth!" Tsume snarls beside us and Mai instantly retreats backwards submissively. I guess it doesn't matter whether you're an alpha female or an omega. When an alpha male tells you to do something you do it. Period. "It's none of your damn business." Tsume finishes with a growl.

Mai's red orbs flicker over to Kiba and Hige, who look thoroughly confused and then back to me and Tsume. Her eyes fall on me and I see her nose wrinkle as if she is regarding something particularly distasteful. "Well," She mutters. "It appears that your pack is more dysfunctional than I previously anticipated…" Her burning gaze lingers a moment longer on me until I'm forced to look away. Then she turns and faces our leader. "I shall personally escort you through these woods. Although my betas heed my every command I cannot be held accountable for what they do off duty…in other words, unless I am with you, I cannot guarantee your safety in my woods." The side of her mouth twitches up into a playful smirk towards the end of her warning, allowing one of her white fangs to poke out.

"Oh yeah?" Tsume nearly chuckles. "And just why should we trust you?"

Her brows rise into a submissive upside-down v and an innocent smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. "Aaaw you're not very nice, are you Jacket? I'm just one little girl. What harm could I possibly do?"

_Probably not much, but your betas are a different story._

She shoots a glare over in my direction as soon as I finish thinking this. Wait, did I just say that out loud?

"C'mon guys." Hige encourages. "Miss Mai is only trying to help us out here. Why don't we take her up on her offer and make things easier for ourselves?"

We all fall quiet, waiting to hear Kiba's verdict. But surely he'll say no. Isn't it obvious that she's a dishonest, lying sack of-

"That's fine."

I gasp and turn to gape at our leader, appalled at him. He can't be serious. He's going to let this stranger lead us into unknown territory where she may very well ambush us? I mean…I guess she hasn't given us a reason to mistrust her yet but…still, it's obvious she has some sort of beef with me. But Kiba isn't thinking about me or himself. He's thinking about what's best for the pack. Besides, I guess I didn't think about how we're pretty much screwed either way; whether we go in by ourselves or with her, there's an equal chance that we'll be attacked by her betas. And since going around the forest isn't an option…

"But remember," Kiba continues. "You, the alpha, are willingly escorting us into your territory. This means you have a responsibility to ensure safety to my pack at all times. If you do anything to defy this I have a right to retaliate. That is the law of the Wolf." He finishes, his clear blue eyes unwavering and righteous.

_Whoa. Seriously, how does Kiba know this stuff? Is there like Alpha school or something?_

"Fine." Mai beams and holds up her right paw, as if she's reciting an oath. "I swear that so long as you _boys_ are under my trees, I shall ensure your safety."

I can clearly see the loophole in her statement: it's me. By saying _boys_ specifically like that she automatically counts me out of her protection. It looks like I was wrong about her. She doesn't just have a beef with me. She wants to eliminate me. She wants to hurt me because…because I'm competition. It makes sense now.

But I can't speak up and say anything, because then that would make me look suspicious. I'm stuck. This female wolf is so conniving and cunning it makes me furious.

"Very well." Kiba says, apparently missing the play on her words.

With a giggle Mai bounces and place and claps her hands excitedly. "Eeee! How fun! I was just starting to get bored too. Follow me this way, please-Oh! Hn hn hn…Excuse me."She blushes and giggles up at Tsume after _"accidentally" _bumping her breasts into his upper forearm. Tsume makes an annoyed noise in the back of his throat but Mai still throws a smirk of victory my way.

I feel my teeth clench in anger. Even though Tsume doesn't like her advances, she knows that _I_ like Tsume. She's doing this on purpose to rub it in my face. And she also knows that _she_ can openly flirt with him and _I _can't…god, now I know where the term bitch comes from.

* * *

We continue walking for the rest of the day. Mai's four betas linger around our little group but it is palpable from the stench in the air that there are more of them lying in wait…lots more.

She continues to flirt with Tsume all day long much to my dismay. Even though I know Tsume isn't interested in her it still makes me angry to see her openly flirt with him like that. It makes me feel like…I dunno, I should assert myself somehow. Show her that he belongs to me.

_But he doesn't belong to you._ The negative half of my brain whispers. Thanks brain, like I haven't gotten enough abuse today. But still, whether he's _mine _or not I still feel the need to make Mai back off.

I wait until I find an object I can trip over: A trunk, a root, a rock—anything. Finally I see a looped up root in my path and I purposely walk into it. I let out a cry as I fall forward and land hard on the ground face first. Not that anyone would suspect anything different from me falling—I've always been kind of a klutz. Tsume is the only one in the group who stops and casts his glance over his shoulder.

It's really not like me to lie. I don't like being dishonest at all, whether it is with words or actions. But I have to know. I have to prove to myself and to _Mai_ that Tsume cares about me.

"Oooow.." I fake whine, rolling on to my bottom, cradling my hurt ankle.

"Hey kid." Tsume says with an impassive expression. "Get a move on. Or you'll get left behind."

"Tsume I-I can't stand up. My paw hurts really bad…"

Tsume sighs loudly in irritation, but turns around and trots over to me. "How bad is it?" He asks as he approaches me.

"I dunno. Maybe you should take a look at it." _Now for the moment of truth…_

"Me? Why the hell should I be the one to look at it?"

"Please Tsume…" I beg breathlessly, staring up at him with watery amber eyes. I try my best to say his name in the same way I did the night in the alley way.

I expect Tsume to turn away and say something sarcastic. He gives an irritated growl and pinches the bridge of his nose to try and hide it but…I still saw it. I can't believe it.

I just made Tsume blush.

"God you are such a _freaking_ pain in the ass."He sighs under his breath, crouching down in front of me. My heart skips a beat as he takes my foot on to his lap and his slender tan fingers start undoing the laces to my boot. I don't know what to say or do any more. I'm suddenly so shy from being touched by him that all I can do is watch what he's doing and hope he can't see my blush in the gloom.

Tsume rolls up the hem of my pant leg to get a better look at what he's doing and his fingers brush against the skin of my ankle. I feel faint electrical sparks ignite under my skin from just his small touch. It is so unexpected that it makes me suck in a breath of surprise. It was just a small touch to one area of my body but I'm already starting to feel that hot aching feeling happening in my loins.

I feel slightly embarrassed as he pulls off my boot, realizing that my foot must not smell the greatest after a day of travel. I nearly go crazy as he runs the first digit of his finger under the hem of my sock and pulls it down and off. He grasps my foot by the heel and holds it up a bit higher, flexing it this way and that to see if anything is wrong. _Oh God…_He's even squeezing my toes to see if any of them are sprained. I don't know why, but for some strange reason this is really turning me on. Maybe it's just because he's undressed me and is now being so gentle and caring. It's so unlike him I…I…blush and start to pant.

Tsume glares at me over the tops of his midnight glasses. "…Your foot is perfectly fine."

I clamp my mouth shut and avert my gaze. He takes my chin between his fingers and forces me to look back into his dominant golden eyes. "You did this on purpose, didn't you?" He growls.

"Tsume I…" I don't know what comes over me. My heart is pounding fast with excitement and my head is dizzy from the rush of hormones I'm feeling. Perhaps it is a compound of my want for him and the need to show Mai that he is mine, but I start to play my naked toes up his leather coated thigh. Slowly going higher and higher.

Tsume's mouth has popped open slightly. He's watching my toes make the slow ascent upwards like he can't believe what I'm doing.

God this is so unlike me…I don't know what I'm doing…I don't even know if this is right. I think my mating instinct has just taken over.

I travel higher until my toes reach the fork of his legs and I caress the soft bulge that lies in the middle.

He takes in a sharp breath and goes rigidly still.

For some reason this makes me braver and I gently rub the pads of my toes up and down the length of his clothed manhood…up and down, up and down. I feel Tsume's member start throbbing occasionally in response to my touch. With each pulse his member gets harder and strains a bit higher.

"Toboe…" He growls in what could either be a dangerously angry or extremely turned on voice. His glasses have slipped down to expose his hooded, glaring golden eyes. "What…are you doing…?"

"Don't you like me, Tsume?" I ask trying to keep the hurt out of my voice. Though it's a stupid question to ask when his throbbing erection is more than enough of an answer. But still, all I can think about is him falling for Mai's charms. All I can think about is him getting fed up with having to deal with my secret and ditching me to be with Mai because it's easier…and because she's prettier than me.

_Sorry kid. But I'm just not interested in your flat chested, no figure, boring appearance anymore. I've found a female who's better. In every. Single. Way._

My vision blurs as tears well in my eyes.

"Toboe…" He growls and then groans when I close my toes around the summit of his bulge and squeeze gently. Pay back, for treating me like trash last night. With great resolve he shoves my leg away. "Stop…this isn't the time for this."

"I knew it…" I sob and blink as the tears spill down my cheeks. Tsume's head snaps to attention upon the sound of my crying. "You like her more, don't you?" _What am I saying? Of course that isn't true. Even I can see that. Why am I saying these things? This isn't like me._ I don't know why I said it. But honestly, Tsume's rejection wounds me deep, and the only reason I can think of is because he doesn't want me—because he's more interested in a female like Mai.

Tsume's brows meet together in an upset v. "Toboe, are you some kind of idiot?"

But I don't want to hear his lies or his excuses. "Well fine!" I yell, ripping my boot out of his grasp. "See if I care! Go on and make Mai your mate. It's not like she has any _baggage_ to deal with, or has no figure, or isn't pretty." I realize I'm sobbing now but I can't stop. It's all just gushing out of me: My frustration about having to hide my gender, my confusion to the way Tsume's been treating me, the way Mai and Hige have constantly been antagonizing me.

Tsume rises to his feet in a millisecond and his mouth is pressed into a firm line. From my time spent with him I know he only does this when he's extremely pissed off. He grabs me roughly by my upper arm and pulls me toward him. "Toboe listen-"

"No, _you_ listen." I yell yanking my arm free of his grasp. Tsume is shocked. For the first time in our friendship I don't directly submit to his will. "…I can't take this anymore, Tsume. Either you like me or you don't. I don't want to play head games like this anymore. If you don't want me…Then fine." I bite down hard on my lower lip to suppress another sob and book it as fast as I can in the opposite direction.

"Toboe!"

I hear him yell furiously after me. I dip my head down and run as fast as I can. All I can hear is the wind rushing in my ears and my ragged breathing. I can't be sure but I don't think he is following me. This makes a sadness so painful dig in to my chest that for a moment it is really hard to breathe. But I ignore it. I don't want him to find me. I weave and dip through so many trees that by now my scent is all over the place. If I ever see him again…it will only be if I wish it.

* * *

**Wow, over dramatic much? I don't think so. Poor Toboe :( but she does have a point: frigging Tsume's been playing love games with her (did anyone just think of old greg when I said love games! Ha!) and then this Chesty Mc'rack-boob character comes in and is hanging all over her man. Sigh…I wonder what will happen to our little heroine and her dark prince in the next chapter? God I sound like a shameless manga artist supporting their own story ._.**

**Thanks to Estrella Krushina, ChocoPokkin, foxykitsuneyouko, and all you guests for leaving reviews. I do see them and they really make me feel all fuzzy inside. –w- haaa they give me the confidence to silence the negatives in my head and write awesomely!**

**And now, an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams**

_Okay, so last night on 7/13/12 I had this dream that basically everyone had polluted the air so much that the surface of the earth was just unbearable. Everything was dead, nothing would grow and everyone was going to die. Then some scientists built this ENORMOUS dome system under the ocean and were somehow able to make a civilization down there with clean air and buildings and everything. Everyone on earth was moving down there because there was no where left to go on the surface. So my mom was like "Okay Jay, grab everything you can carry because we're never coming back here again."I just felt extremely sad because the surface is my home, you know? I didn't want to leave everything behind. I can't remember why but I chose not to take anything with me, and that made me even sadder. After that all I can remember is being inside this iridescent bubble thing shooting impossibly fast underwater. I was looking out from the inside and everything was rushing by and it all just seemed so unreal. I was so sad. I had officially just left my entire life behind me. When we arrived to the underwater dome place it looked just like the surface. I couldn't even tell I was under water. There was a blue sky with birds and clouds…these scientists really outdid themselves. Then I guess I got a job at the Krusty Krab and started my employment the same day when Pearl redesigned the restaurant to be the Kuddly Krab so I had to wear that stupid pink jump suit uniform. For some reason I had to…walk through these hallways with twirly carwash brushes and have them slap me a certain way to change the Krusty Krab back to normal. But then a whole bunch of hallways opened up and everything got all quiet and dark and I just got really scared. So I ran back into the restaurant and was like " , I quit."_

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	7. Chapter 7

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter seven

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

*This chap is dedicated to ChocoPokkin. I hope this helps you get better

* * *

Eventually I have to stop running to put my other boot back on. Stupid. I don't mean the part about running with just one boot on; I mean this _whole thing_ is just stupid. And it's even worse because this is all my fault. Those were my words that spewed from my mouth. I'm the one who put myself in this situation…

God I just…I don't know why I even _said_ or _did_ any of those things. I guess I-I just needed to be showed in some way that he cared for me, or that he at least liked me. And when he didn't it was like…I lost it.

Well great, this is all just awful…what should I do now?

I'm all alone in a dark forest that I've never been to before, and I've probably just made my pack mates worry about me. They've probably stopped to go look for me and are now holding up our trip to paradise because I had to be an immature brat and throw a temper tantrum…god I feel so selfish. I saunter over to a rock and plop myself down on to it with a sigh. I slip on my boot and skillfully begin to lace the strings back through the hoops and hooks.

The forest silence that envelopes me is almost deafening. I'm alone. Completely and utterly alone. God I'm so pitiful. Again insecurities and doubts rack my brain.

_Why did I do that? Should I have done that?...Well, maybe it wasn't the best thing to do…_I feel my cheeks sting in embarrassment as I recall my advance towards Tsume and how he so easily turned away from me. "Haaaaaw…" I whine and burry my face into my hands. "I took a risk by putting myself out like that and I blew it…now I've just made myself look like a sex-crazed puppy."

But at the same time can I really blame myself? I mean god, Tsume has _not_ been easy on me at all through any of this. One minute he's hot, and then the next minute he's cold. He's sending me so many mixed signals; it's all so very confusing. And with the way he acts how can I _really_ be sure he doesn't like Mai…? Upon the thought of her I grit my teeth and my stomach clenches in anger. She makes me so upset I start to feel small drops of tears pool on the corners of my eyes.

That's it. I just can't sit here anymore. I rise and am temporarily confused about which way to go…should I start heading back and think about how I'm going to apologize to Tsume and the others? Or…should I just keep wallowing in my self-pity and go even further into the forest? The second option makes me extremely sad. Yet the first option makes me feel embarrassed on so many different levels that I find the prospect of going back there so soon repulsing. So, now I'm kinda stuck in…purgatory? Is that what they call it?

With a sigh I turn right and start walk through a line of trees, choosing to neither go back or to go forward. I'm astonished at what I find on the other side of the trees. There are white stones all around me. Some are kind of raised up and positioned like those really old theaters from Rome. I think this used to be a stadium at one point, because all the stones look too flat and cubical to be natural. They cover the ground in front of me. They are still stuck in the ground in their neat, flat, mortar-like prison; grass has started to grow out from between the white bricks. I look forward and there is a large tall wall across from me where the stage must have been. I guess that's the only side of the building that's still standing.

I suddenly feel very tired from all the things that have happened today, even though it is only four in the evening. I walk forward more, determined to get a better look at this place. _Wow, there's really a lot of open space here._

"Aaaaw, has poor baby come here to cry?" I whirl around and gasp when I hear a girly voice whine behind me. It's Mai. She is standing on top of the highest row of stone seats and his looking down at me with a condescending smirk.

I assume an offensive stance and turn to face her fully. _Oh great. It's _her. _What the heck could she possibly want now?_ _Did she follow me all the way out here just to rub it in my face? Or is it…_I suddenly feel my blood go cold when I see more than twenty of her Betas all step into view: both on top of the steps next to her, and on the ground around the building, blocking all ways of escape.

Slowly, her reason for following me begins to fall into place. _Oh no_…I didn't realize it while I was running away. But by separating myself from my pack like this…I've basically made myself a sitting duck for her and her Betas. I'm at her mercy now. _God I am so many different levels of _stupid.

"What do you want?" I demand, trying to act like I'm not shaking in my boots.

"Haaa, again with the _rude_ demands." Mai trills flaunting her pink mane. Her smirk widens and her red glare narrows at me. "You know…I never _did_ like you much anyway. Honestly, where _do_ you get all that nerve from?"

Nerve? What the hell is she talking about? Can't she tell I'm about to piss my own pants here?

She continues, unabashed by my confused look. "You just waltz right in here, another female into my territory, and expect me to believe that you're _not_ going to try to steal any of my mates? Or overthrow me? Sorry, but I wasn't born yesterday sweetie, unlike you. What you did was an obvious challenge to my status as an alpha, and now I've come to put you in your place."

"What…" My voice leaves my lips in a shaky whisper. "No, you've got it all wrong. I never wanted to steal _anything._ _You're _the one who keeps hanging all over…all over my mate." My face goes red upon addressing Tsume as this. I'm quietly thankful that he's not here at the present moment, but then curse myself in an afterthought. Crap. He _won't_ be here. I made sure of that.

"Oh?" Mai asks raising her brows. "He certainly didn't look like your mate to me. Or at least he didn't act like it, anyway."

"Yeah well that's only…because…" I feel my voice fail me. I don't know what to say. How am I supposed to explain Tsume's actions?

"It's because he knows you're scrawny, you're homely, and you're a puppy. In fact I can't see _why_ he would ever find someone like you attractive."

I feel tears starting to pool around my amber orbs but it is not because I'm angry this time.

"He rejected you, didn't he?" She goes on taking immense pleasure in watching my face twist in pain. "That's why you ran away into the woods like a little upset child. But I guess I can't blame you. He made it exceedingly _obvious_ that he doesn't want you…Aaaw, have I made you cry?"

I furiously wipe at the tears streaming down my face while she and her Betas chuckle at my misery.

"Well don't worry. I'll keep mister long dark and handsome _more_ than occupied while you're…away."

I hate her. I have never hated _anyone_ in my entire life, no matter what they have tried to do to me. Even if they tried to kill me I never harbored any hatred for those people, because I knew it was only a matter of survival. But Mai is taking this to a whole different level. She's _making_ this personal.

I'm so angry my brain-to-mouth filter blows a fuse. "Oh yeah? Well even if Tsume doesn't like me there's no way he would _ever_ like you. And do you know why? Because you're an awful person, Mai! Your heart is nothing but a black, empty hole!"

She instantly stops laughing and her pretty face darkens into an expression of furry.

_Oh no…I shouldn't have said that._

"…We'll just see about that." She snaps her fingers and her Betas all slowly start to inch closer around me. _Oh no…what's going to happen to me?_ "It isn't easy being top bitch around here." Mai continues, grossly entertained by her Betas circling me like a pack of sharks. "Every once and a while some female comes into my woods thinking she can overthrow me or steal some of my Betas…you're no different from any of them."

What? She's done this to other girls before?

"I'll put you in the same place where I've put all the others: in the ground."

"What will you have us do, Miss Mai?" One of them asks by her side. I absently realize this is the first time I've heard one of them say anything.

Her mouth quirks up at one side in to a twisted smile. "You may have your way with her. But when all of you have had your fill…kill her."

My eyes go wide and my breath seizes in terror. My amber eyes fly around wildly, trying to find some route of escape. _I've got to leave. I've gottah get out of here_! But it's no use. Her Betas have completely surrounded me. They're all approaching me terrifyingly slow, each of them has a twisted smile on their face. I do the only thing I can and cautiously inch backwards, trying to put any distance I can between me and these men. But of course, I only manage to take three steps back before I bump into the only side of the ruined building that's still standing. My face crumples in despair and I look up into the heavens. _Why? _I ask the unexplained force that's stringed my life together. _Why do you always corner me against a wall? Am I doomed to constantly relive this exact kind of terror?_

When I bring my gaze back down they are all so terribly close to me. I yelp as one and then another seize both my wrists. It is now that my fight or flight instinct kicks in. This time it is fight. I turn on the Beta to my right, possessed by a primitive instinct to survive, and sink my fangs deeply into his hand. He screams in pain and releases me. I take advantage of my free hand and poke another male in both his eyes. He crumbles backwards clutching his face. Adrenaline is singing through my veins and I'm going so fast, the guy holding my left wrist is only just starting to realize what's happening. Before he can do anything I bring my boot up in a swift kick to the fork of his legs. His eyes bulge out and he makes a breathless wheezing noise before he sinks to the ground, clutching his loins.

I'm astonished at myself and apparently so are her Betas. I've just disarmed three males who are all twice my weight.

"What's wrong with you guys!" Mai booms outraged, stomping her healed foot. "_Get_ her already!"

I might have been able to catch them off guard before but now I am all out of luck. They aren't going to go easy on me anymore. Before I can blink two of them grab me by my shoulders and pin me against the wall. I kick and squirm trying to escape but it is no use. They are too strong and there are too many of them. They easily contain me. "Stop it! Let me go!" I yell.

"Yeah, that's right. Yell all you want, chicky." One of them rasps in front of me. "We like it when they struggle."

"Let go! Don't you touch me!" But my cries are drowned out by the excited calls and cries of the hungry crowd.

"Come on! Take her shirt off!" one of them yells a moment before the male standing in front of me grasps my shirt and tears it open. I don't know how, but they manage to pull it off of me so now I'm completely topless and my bound breasts are exposed. The cries around me get louder and now three of them are working on undoing my boots and removing my pants.

_God. No…please no. It all can't end like this…_

I cry out in terror and begin struggling anew as they remove both my boots and my pants…and then my bandages. Tears spill down my face as a mixture of furry and terror over comes me. They're all looking at me, licking their chops as their mouths water.

"God…you look so delicious." The one in front of me says a glint coming to his eyes.

As I look back into this man's eyes I feel despair rack my body with a sob. My entire life I've lived in hiding. I've suffered ridiculing, alienation, and anomie for all of my efforts, but it was all worth it so long as I still had my dignity. I've endured so much but despite all of that…it was all going to end like this. It's not fair. It just isn't _fair_. I just can't believe any of this is happening. I don't know what comes over me, but I abandon all hope and put all of my strength into one last plea for help. I throw my head back scream.

"TSUMMMEEEEEEEE!" My cry rips through the air like a siren.

A loud howl rises up out of the trees in answer and an instant later the man in front of me is thrown to the ground. I gasp and blink my eyes but I still can't see what's happening. It's all happening so fast. I see this blur of color flashing through the males around me. Wherever it travels it leaves a man gushing blood in its wake.

I hear another howl, and then another, and then similarly two different blurs enter the fray and start demolishing. But now I see that they aren't just blurs. They are my friends: Kiba, Hige and…Tsume too.

The two men holding my arms cry out in confusion a moment before Tsume spontaneously appears in front of us, standing in the same spot as the man he'd just cut down. I gasp in terror when I look into his eyes. I've never seen Tsume looked so livid. His golden eyes are wide and his nostrils are flared from furry. Tsume turns on the man at my left and lets out a vicious snarl before brandishing his fangs and sinking them into his exposed throat. _Oh my god_. He didn't even bother to transform before he did that. The male makes an awful wheezing noise as Tsume savagely shakes his head to sever his jugular. Hot blood erupts out of his neck like a geyser and stains my pale virgin skin all over.

"Ah! No, please don't-!" The other man pleads, releasing me but Tsume shows him no mercy. In a flash he pins the man against the same wall as me, gripping him by his neck. Tsume's face twists into a mask of extreme anger as he looks this man that was about to defile me in the eye. I see his guarded knife flash briefly in the waning light before he stabs it into the man's body one…two…three…four…five times. The man's eyes go wide and all he can do is grunt in terror and in pain.

Finally satisfied, Tsume releases him and lets him fall to the ground. He stands there breathing heavily in rage, watching the man slowly die from drowning in his own blood.

I press my back against the wall, and slowly sink down to my knees. I wrap my arms around my exposed breasts and watch my friends with wide eyes cut through these Betas as if they were nothing. I'm paralyzed. I can't move. I can't speak. I can hardly even think. All I can do is tremble and whimper.

"Toboe? Toboe!" Tsume yells and appears in front of me, kneeling on the ground. I look into his face but I cannot respond. I'm numb with fear and adrenaline. His expression is different now. I've never seen him look this scared before. He grips my shoulders and shakes me slightly.

"Toboe? Are you alright? Answer me!" There is no trace of his usual scowl or wrinkled brow. His golden eyes are wide and he almost looks as if he's going to cry.

_Why does he look so concerned? Can't he see that I'm fine? _But then I realize that I'm covered in all of that guy's blood and he must not know it's not mine.

"N-n-no…I'm fine…"I whimper in a very small voice.

"Did they touch you?" He persists but I can't answer. It's like I've lost my voice or something. When I don't answer Tsume places his hands on either side of my head and shakes it slightly. "You tell me, did they _touch you_ Toboe?"

I blink stupidly and manage to shake my head. "No…they didn't…get a chance to."

Tsume expels a breath of air and pulls me on to his lap into a tight bear hug. One of his hands threads in my hair while his nose buries into my honey brown colored locks. "Thank god. I couldn't…I could never live with myself if I let them touch you like that."

And then the tears come. I feel hot, fat globes of them spilling down my cheeks and a moment later the sobs start to rack my body. My arms wrap around him and I grip on to Tsume for dear life. All of the things I've been going through today just gush out of me and I burry my face into his shoulder and cry.

I feel Tsume's warm hand soothingly rubbing up and down my naked back. It feels so rough but at the same time so tender and soft. "Hey, it'll be alright." He murmurs in his gravely, low voice into my ear. "I'll handle all this, Toboe." He pulls away for a moment, removes his black leather jacket and drapes it over my shoulders. It feels warm inside, and is obviously way too big for me around the shoulders and everywhere else for that matter. I look up at him and he's looking back at me with a rare, genuine Tsume smile. "Come on," He says, wiping one of my tears away with the rough pad of his thumb. "Enough with this stupid crying crap, alright?"

I snivel and wipe my runny nose. I dip my head in a nod and beam back at him with every fiber of my being. "Kay…"

I dare a glance over Tsume's shoulder and see that sadly most of the Betas are dead. I don't like killing. I really don't. Even though these guys were all about rape and kill me…I have to wonder if killing _all_ of them was entirely necessary. I look up at the top of the stadium seats where Mai first made her appearance to see if she has fled. No, she is still there. She is fixed to the spot with a petrified look marring her pretty face. She's slowly shaking her head, as if in denial and is looking at the bloody scene before her.

"No…my…my Betas…"She hiccups in a faint sob, but my keen ears can hear it even all the way over here.

Kiba stands up from his most recent kill and turns to face Mai with a valiant glare while still in wolf form. Fresh blood stains his dirty white coat. A loud growl rumbles from his throat while his human voice resounds within our minds.

"_Mai!"_ He shouts outraged. _"What's the meaning of this?"_

But Mai cannot answer. She is looking at Kiba with wide red eyes as if he is the big bad wolf mentioned in all the children's fairy tales.

"_Why did you try to kill Toboe?"_ He demands. But again, Mai has nothing to say in her defense. I don't think she anticipated that my friends cared what about happened to me…to be a little honest…neither did I.

"_Do you remember what I said earlier, Mai? It's our law that you were to ensure safety to my pack at all times. And if you failed then I had my right to retaliate."_ Kiba snarls and snaps his iron strong fangs. _"Now get down here so I may have my retaliation!"_

"Haven't you already taken enough!" Mai shrieks, tears streaming down her face. "Half of my Betas are dead. DEAD!"

I guess I was wrong about her being totally heartless…I think…she really truly did love all of her Betas. I actually pity her a little bit right now.

"And I _never_ promised _her_ protection!" She shrills, stabbing a finger through the air at me. Hige's face goes blank in surprise upon hearing her address me as a female.

_Well…crap._

But if Kiba is surprised he does not show it._ "It doesn't matter."_ Kiba's voice is a steady growl now. _"The law extends to both males and females alike. Your Betas were cut down because they attacked us. I must receive it from you, the alpha."_

Mai's breaths are rapid and short. Without the help of her Betas, she's completely helpless now. Just a few moments ago our positions were completely reversed.

"_Fine then: If you won't come to me…then I'll come to you!"_ I see Kiba leap up the steps in lightning quickness and the next time I blink he's standing upright in front of Mai in human form. She gasps, horrified and spins around on her heel to flee, but he is there behind her too.

Before she can move again Kiba brandishes his claws and rakes them down one side of her pale face. Mai screams and her hands fly up to cover her face. She spins around and I see three, angry, red, long slashes marring one entire side of her face. I wait and watch Kiba, anticipating that he will kick her down the step-like seats next. But he does not. He seems to be satisfied with just this much revenge. But why? Technically he has the right to kill her if he chooses. Why is he being so merciful? If it were me…

But after watching a moment more I see why he's chosen only to do this because Mai starts screaming. "My face! My beautiful, beautiful face! You cunt! You motherfucking asshole! What did you do to my face!" She's screaming outraged. Now I understand: To Mai, her beauty is everything. She is so extremely vain taking away her beautiful face would be even worse than killing her. Even worse than taking away all her betas. She turns and lunges at Kiba who easily steps out of the way of her attack. She does not even bother to turn around and try again. She escapes into the woods, sobbing and leaving drops of red blood in her wake.

I've seen enough. I hold on to Tsume tight and hide my face into his chest. I'm so glad that he's here right now. So, so glad. Oh yeah but…Kiba and Hige are here too…and I'm pretty much naked. And Mai more or less just told them I was a she…

I look over his shoulder again and see Kiba and Hige approaching us. Well…I suppose there's no hiding it from them now. I clutch Tsume's jacket around me and stand to face them. My face is fixed into an emotionless mask but my heart is beating wildly. Will they be mad at me? For both running away and hiding this from them? Will they not like me or treat me differently? I can barely stand the silence that envelopes us.

Hige's gaze settles on me and I see his brow furrow in confusion. He looks from me, to Tsume, to Kiba (who's blank as always) and then back to me. "Wait a minute…wait just a second." He shakes his head and his eyes go all big. "Are you trying to tell me that…Toboe is a _girl?_"

* * *

**Oh the humanity! First a near death/rape experience, then a last minute rescue and now the guys know she's a girl? Certainly an eventful chapter. Personally, I think Mai got what she deserved -.- But you know I feel a little bad making her a bitch and then basically shitting all over her life because…despite it all she's still and oc :/ oh whatevs. **

**Kay so I think I'm gonna take a short break from this story because now I honestly can't think of anything to write. I mean, I know there are some definite possibilities but I dunno. None of them seem conflict-y enough…if that makes any sense. But I mean it guys: if you have an idea of what to do or if you have a request pm me or leave your idea in a review if you don't have an account. I won't think you're weird if you do -.- honestly a shot in the dark would be better than what I got now…which is no clue.**

**Kay, bye for now!**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_On 6/1/12 I had a dream that I was Eruka frog from soul eater and I had a broom and was flying around which was frigging awesome. So I flew down to my grandma's house and told her that since I had a broom now and didn't have to worry about gas I could go to the grocery store for her. So she went and got me her card but I got too excited and flew away before she could hand me the list. But instead of flying to the grocery store I flew to what must have been some sort of college. And then that's where my dream changed and apparently I was a lion that looked like Mufasa and I went to this college. But I guess I forgot I went there and I had been absent for several days. So I went to go talk to the head master (who literally was a master of heads) and he had to keep switching his heads with the heads of statues because his original head was too big and heavy. So he said that I would still pass if I started attending class immediately and busted my ass. Then all of a sudden he was like "Oh jesus, I gottah get the hell outtah here. It was nice talking to you-bye!" And then he booked it out of the hallway and I was like…what the fuck….Then suddenly the bell rang and all of the students burst out of the class rooms. Apparently everyone else was an animal too. Now I guess everyone started to play a game of who could make it to the end of the hallway first because that's what everyone started to do, and all the animals got into teams corresponding to what animal they were. But I had had enough of that shit and started swatting bitches out of my way with my mighty paws while roaring ferociously. All the other lions were like "Holy shit, look at Jay go." Then before I knew it the hallway was completely empty and I was like…did I win? Then the huge buffalo team came stampeding down the hallway and swept me away with them. I tried to reason with them to let me go, but they were spiteful to me for eating their kin so they ran straight over a cliff and they took me down with them. Then I turned into Ciel Phantomhive and begged to be saved and this noodle monster came to my rescue._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	8. Chapter 8

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter eight

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

****Credit goes to ChocoPokkin for giving me this idea****

* * *

"…Well, is anyone going to start explaining here?" Hige persists when no one answers his first question. I feel like I should explain myself but I...I…For crying out loud, I'm _half frigging naked_ in front of these guys! I'm a little tongue tied right now. "Why isn't anyone else shocked about this?" He says, looking at Tsume and Kiba's passive expressions. "Come on. I can't be the _only_ person that didn't know, right Kiba?"

"Well, I mean I had my suspicions. Ever since that night near the brook…I dunno, I could just kind of _sense _it."

"Aaaaagh, you gottah be kidding me." Hige whines passing a hand over his face. "You mean I was basically the only one who was oblivious the whole time?"

"Yep. Pretty much, porky." Tsume sighs, standing up next to me. I stare down at my little pink toes, suddenly feeling very shy of him.

Hige still looks like he's trying to wrap his head around all of this. He's looking at me with his hands on his hips and has an eye brow cocked, as if he still can't believe I'm a girl. "…Well, I guess this means I _am_ Queen Latifah after all."

Despite the seriousness of the situation I burst out in giggles and have to silence them by covering my hand over my mouth. I look over at Tsume's confused face as Kiba and Hige join in and my giggles are reborn anew.

Hige smiles and I begin to feel a little bit better. "So…Toboe's a girl, hunh?" He asks with a key of interest hinting his tone. But he quickly shrinks back when Tsume shoots him a hooded glare. "I-I mean, not that it makes much of a difference anyway." He crosses his arms behind his head and pretends to look away indifferently. "Sorry kid but, you're just not my type, you know?"

Oh Hige…I don't understand how he can afford to be so picky when the pickin's are slim from the start. He's got some pretty high standards, if you ask me.

But now everyone falls quiet and I can tell they're waiting for me to speak. My amber eyes fall to the ground. I suddenly feel too bashful to look any of them in the eye. "Listen I…I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys about this. I-It's not that I don't trust you. I just…well…I mean…"I suck in a faint breath of surprise as I feel Kiba's hand clap down on my shoulder. When I lift my head to look at him he is smiling down on me warmly.

"Toboe. It's alright."

_What? _I blink my amber orbs up at him incredulously. _It is?_

"We all have secrets about our past that we haven't told each other about. But that doesn't mean we're dishonest or that we're evil. I can understand why you would want to keep this hidden about yourself, Toboe. So don't worry, okay?"

I can't believe it. These guys are taking this _way_ better than I ever could have imagined. I look over to Hige to gage his expression but he is just smiling warmly at me the same way Kiba is. A blissful smile breaks across my face and I'm powerless to try to contain it. "Oh guys…thank you. Thanks a whole bunch!"

"Ehhh, don't mention it, runt." Hige says, flashing his big goofy grin.

"We should get moving." Kiba interjects. "This is a bad place for us to stay while we're still in Mai's forest. Hurry up and get dressed, Toboe. We need to leave quickly." As he finishes saying this he turns around and faces the opposite direction. Hige does the same.

_Oh, right. It's because I have to get changed. _I blush, not being used to such polite behavior. But in an afterthought I remind myself that stuff like this will probably happen more often now since they know I'm a girl.

My blush increases tenfold however when I see that Tsume is the only one who hasn't turned around_. A little presumptuous, isn't he?_ I think, my brow furrowing. _Does he think I'm the kind of girl that will just change in front of him?...Well, maybe I _would_ want to but…_

"Come on." Tsume's voice snaps me out of my wandering thoughts. I feel my mouth pop open when I see Tsume hold up something that looks like my shirt. Wait a second— that _is_ my shirt…and he's holding it open for me to slip into. "Will you hurry up?" He says, his characteristically moody temper flaring. "We have to get out of here."

"I-I was getting ready to, okay?" I retort, and think about just how many times I've said that since I've started my journey with these guys. I turn around so that my back is facing Tsume…and slowly let his jacket slip down my naked skin. I feel my face heat up until I'm sure I'm as red as a tomato. This feels so dirty for some reason. And while Kiba and Hige are around…well, they're turned around, but still. And the only article of clothing on my body is my underwear. I can't turn around to look but at the same time the thought is practically killing me: _Is he looking at me?_

"Hold your arms out." He commands in his gruff voice, as if in answer to my thoughts. I obediently submit and raise my arms as he's told me. Without hesitation he slips my arms through the sleeves. I feel a little bit better now that at least the front of my shirt is covering my breasts. But it still needs to be buttoned. The idea that Tsume is behind me watching makes my fingers clumsy and shaky. I can barely manage to get them through—

"Rrgh, you're going too slow." I gasp as Tsume grips me by my shoulder and spins me around to face him. I look down and blink in surprise at his slender fingers skillfully and quickly buttoning up my shirt. I…I don't know what to say…_he_ _wants to dress me?_ I flush a dark scarlet.

Apparently Tsume has noticed that I'm staring at him because he looks up at me through a hooded, agitated glare. "What?" He asks, annoyed.

Jeez, this guy has some nerve: He quietly demands to dress me and _he_ has the gall to get annoyed? But I say nothing. You don't argue with Tsume when he's set on doing something. "Uhm…nothing…" I murmur.

Tsume looks back down and continues his work. Usually when I dress myself I leave just the top one unbuttoned because otherwise the collar chafes against my skin but Tsume…he leaves _four_ unbuttoned…I can't be sure, but I think he did that on purpose…

"Right. That should do it." He says and then reaches down beside him to grab the next article of clothing. _How the hell did he have time to get all of my clothes together? _He leans down while at the same time holding my pants open for me at the waist, making it easy for me to step into them. _Why does he want to dress me so bad? And in front of the other guys?...It's kind of embarrassing_.

"Uhm…Tsume, I can dress myself you know…" I start to say in a small voice but I'm cut off by the ugly frown that Tsume casts me.

"Look, do you want to be eaten alive by this bitch's Betas or what?" He deadpans.

The idea makes me shudder. I look down at him with wide amber eyes and silently shake my head no.

"Then quit dragging your ass and get into your clothes. I'm not going to say it again."

_Well jeez. Sor_ry_, mister bossy._

I gingerly step into my cargo pants and as soon as I'm situated Tsume pulls them up my legs and over my bottom. _Is he…? Oh god, he's going to—_

I have to bite down hard on my lower lip to stifle a gasp as Tsume fishes his fingers around the crotch of my pants looking for the zipper.

_Oh god. His fingers. They're so close to down _there. _I think I might just…This isn't right, I should tell him to stop. I never said he could do this._ But at the same time I don't want him to stop. I don't want his fingers to go so soon. I relish the feeling of his fingers being near that part of my body…

After he's found my zipper he swiftly pulls it up, buttons them and buckles my belt.

I let out a small sigh, mostly from relief but there's a bit of disappointment in there too. The next thing I know Tsume grasps me by my chin and presses his mouth down firmly over mine. My amber eyes go round with surprise and my cheeks heat up yet again. God his lips are so…soft and warm. Totally not what I expected from tough, rugged, tanned Tsume. But it's still unbelievably sensational all the same.

He pulls away and smirks down at me, amused by my embarrassed expression. "I've been wanting to do that since the night you looked at me when you came out of the alley."

_What?..._my brain is reeling, half from just initial shock and the other half from all my blood flushing to my face. _He's _wanted_ to do that? This whole time? Even with…_I can't bring myself to even _think_ her name. A small smile perks the corners of my mouths as I think triumphantly. _So he does like me…It's not just me. He _does_ like me after all!_ I can hardly contain my goofy grin as it spreads across my face. I want to leap up and hug him but I restrain myself. I know Tsume isn't like that and I don't want to ruin this moment for myself.

Tsume holds up my pair of boots by their laces. "Go on, you big idiot. Put these on and we'll go." His expression is all serious now just as always. But at least now I know: my feelings…they aren't just one sided.

"Hn hn hn, yeah! You got it!"

* * *

Tsume's been acting differently towards me ever since the guys found out I was a girl. But I mean that in a good way. Like when we were walking out of the arena and back into the forest, Tsume tagged behind to walk next to me. That's a big deal! At least it is to me, anyway. Of course though he didn't say anything or even look my way but I knew: He wouldn't have done this normally. All I can do is smile and try to contain my happiness. Because I know as soon as I start hanging all over him or talk too much he's going to get turned off. So I try my best to contain myself if it means keeping him by my side.

We find a very small cave near the outskirts of Mai's territory. We are so close to the edge I can see the open space beyond the trees and very little shadows are lingering around. Everyone saunters over to this cramped cave and sits down on a rock.

"Whew, I'm beat." Hige sighs. "That fight really took a lot out of me. Let's rest here for a second, okay guys?"

"Yeah." Kiba agrees, taking a seat. "We should be fine here. We're close enough to the edge to be out of their range."

I don't have a problem with stopping, but I'm really thirsty. I know that if I don't drink now then I probably won't get a chance to for a while. It's not like there's water just lying around out there in the wastes, you know? I can smell water over to my left. It shouldn't be too far away. "I'm really thirsty guys. I'm gonna go get a drink of water, okay?"

"Alright." Kiba dips his head in recognition and I turn on the heel of my boot in direction for the water.

"Hey kid." Tsume calls to me and I stop in my tracks to turn and listen to him. He appears indifferent, standing with a hand on his hip, but concern is evident in his flickering golden orbs. "Don't' be gone too long, you got it?" He growls, and then when he sees my flattered look he quickly sticks his nose in the air and adds. "Not that I'm worried or anything; I just want to get out of this god forsaken hell hole, that's all."

But I know. He _is_ concerned about me. With a brilliant smile I nod my head and chuckle. "Yep. Don't you worry. I'll be right back."

* * *

After the first few minutes of walking by myself through this forest, I start to wonder if going alone was a good idea. I mean I was just nearly _killed_ by the alpha of these woods and apparently her Betas are crawling everywhere. Besides, the last time I separated myself from my pack in these woods things didn't go too well for me.

Well, it's kind of too late now to go back and ask for one of them to escort me. I take a deep breath and try to calm down. _Stay calm, Toboe. Stay calm. _I tell myself that everything will be just fine. If I need help all I have to do is howl and the guys will come running…I hope. Besides, we're practically so close to the edge of the woods, and the Beta's numbers are so wounded, I can't see why any of them would be stupid enough to come out this far after us. As far as they know, I'm being accompanied by my _body guards_. Okay, I know they're not _really_ my body guards but it's still a really cool idea that makes a goofy grin break out across my face.

I giggle to myself and skip the rest of the way to the watering hole.

Even though I know the odds are in my favor I'm not a fool. Before I close my eyes and absorb myself in drinking I stick my nose in the air to make sure the scene is clear. I sweep my amber eyes over the landscape once, confirming no one else is around, and dip my head to drink. The water rushes into my mouth and drenches my dry throat. _Aaaaah god…so good_ I sigh inwardly as I lap mouthful after mouthful of delicious forest water.

At first when I look down into the water, I think I see two golden colored tadpoles floating by. But then I realize those two golden disks are not something _in_ the water: They are a reflection. They are a reflection of golden eyes set in the crude outline of a wolf.

I gasp in surprise and literally leap at least two feet into the air. Standing across from me on the other side of the watering hole is a brown-tan wolf with a slash over his chest. His wound looks fresh.

A strange wolf in an aggressive forest. I'm all alone in unfamiliar territory. I feel my legs start to tremble and the hair start to prickle at the nape of my neck. "W-who…who are you?" I ask, though I can pretty much guess the answer.

The wolf is emotionless. He says nothing and then an instant later a wide, toothy grin pulls at the corners of his mouth. "Aaaaw shucks, babe. Don't tell me you don't remember who I am?"

I feel my heart stop beating. That voice. That raspy, disgusting voice. I remember now. He was the one who…he was the one who was standing in front of me, who pinned me down and ripped off my shirt. He was the first to get cut down by Tsume but…apparently he didn't stay down.

The wolf slowly nodded his head as he watched the horrified recognition spread across my face. "Yeeeah. You know who I am. And I know who you are. And I know what your little boyfriend did to my buddies."

"Buddies…?" The word leaves my throat in a petrified murmur. I can hardly follow what he's saying I'm so scared. _Someone, please help!_

"That's right, _doll face_." He practically hisses the word as he slowly starts to round the watering hole to where I am. My ears flatten to my head and my quivering tail droops between my legs. I revert to human form to try and make myself bigger but it is no use because he does the same thing. Whether we show ourselves as wolves or as humans, he still towers over me.

The panic is so heavy in the air around me I can barely breathe. He's getting closer, but I can't move. I'm so scared my paws are rooted to the spot.

"Last time, your little boy toys came running to your rescue. You got lucky kid. Now because uh you, half my buddies are dead and my girl's goods've gotten damaged."

He's standing so close to me now I can feel his shadow looming over me. It's thick, like smoke, and chokes the air out of my lungs.

"But no one's here to save you now. It's just you…and me…And I'm going to make you pay for what your little boyfriend did to my girl. An eye for an eye, that's the way of us wolves." As he speaks flexes his human fingers and his dark wolf claws jut out from the tips.

I feel my skin break out in a cold sweat and a weird whimpering sound comes out of my throat.

"Say goodnight." He growls and slashes his claws at me.

I clench my eyes shut and wait for the worst to be over. I feel hot blood splatter on to my cheeks and I cry out…but I don't feel any pain.

Confused, I peek open an amber eye and am astonished to see a tall, dark and lean form standing in front of me.

"Tsume!" I yell as he staggers forward, a hand clutching his chest which is bleeding badly.

_Oh no, oh no oh no oh no!_ I panic, my amber eyes filling with tears. _Tsume is hurt. He's bleeding badly and…it's all my fault. _I look around Tsume, afraid of what I might find on the other guys face. But he looks just as surprised and horrified as I do.

"Y…You…" The brown wolf trembles, taking in the steel grey form of the killing machine that slaughtered half his friends. "I-It's you. Wha..wha…wha…" He can't seem to finish his sentence but his words are written all over his face.

"Rgggh…bastard…" Tsume growls, his lip curling over his fangs in a snarl. I hear the faint _pit pat_ of his blood dropping on the ground and I hope to god this guy doesn't want to fight. Tsume is seriously hurt. "Get the hell out of here." I hear Tsume growl dangerously low. The guy in front of us just looks rooted to the spot in terror, much like I am right now. "I said get the _fuck_ outtuh here!" Tsume booms and this seems to snap the man out of his paralysis. He stumbles backwards and books it back into the forest.

It isn't until we both smell the guys scent fade away that we move.

"Aaah…Damn it…" Tsume growls and drops down to one knee clutching his chest.

"Tsume…" I say with concern and round him to look at his wounds. I take in a sharp breath. The slashes look long and deep. Dark red blood is pouring out of his wound and is staining his tan, slender fingers. "Aaah…y-you're bleeding." I feel hot tears pool at the corners of my eyes.

Tsume swings his gaze round to me and glares at me under his angry silver brow. "Don't' just stand there, you idiot. Call the others for help. Now!"

"Haaa, r-right." I quickly shift to wolf form and drop to a sitting position. I throw my muzzle back into the air and let my loud howl resonate through the still forest air. Out of anyone in our group, I have the loudest and strongest howl. You can even hear my cry through the raging winds of a sandstorm. I always thought it was what made me special, like Hige and his sensitive nose or Kiba and his fangs. I mean, howling _is_ my namesake, after all. But now I feel like it is so hard to do. With Tsume's life possibly on the line I feel panic like an iron vice pinching me around the middle.

I don't stop howling. Not even for a minute. I cry and cry until Hige and Kiba arrive. Unpleasant shock registers on both of their faces as he and Hige burst through the line of bushes.

"What happened, Toboe?" Kiba shouts, looking at the nearly incapacitated Tsume.

"Th-the guy, from earlier from the arena. He showed up while I was drinking and then…and then…Aaah I don't know, but Tsume jumped in the way and got hurt. He's hurt real bad, you guys!"

"That's it." Kiba concludes. "We can't stay here anymore. We're not safe so long as we're in this forest. We have to get out of here. Now."

"Now?" I repeat in a daze and blink my eyes in confusion. "But, Tsume's hurt. We can't just move him-"

"We don't have a choice." I shrink backwards at Kiba's firm tone. He's not usually this stern with me but he wants me to know he's not messing around here: He's serious.

"How are we going to move Tsume?" I ask hesitantly.

"Don't worry about me." I hear Tsume growl and I gasp in concern as he painfully staggers to his feet. His gold gaze clashes against Kiba's blue stare, almost as if he's daring our leader to try and stop him. "I'll be fine…"

"No you won't!" I meant to think them but the words come bursting out of my mouth. I see Tsume's mouth stiffen into a line and I know he's getting irritated but I don't care. "Tsume, your cuts are really bad. There's no time for you to try and act tough. You should just sit down and res-"

"Shut up, Toboe." Tsume growls, cutting me off. "I'll be…nggh…I'll be just fine." He attempts to stagger forward and fumbles. Quickly and without a word I rush forward to drape Tsume's arm over my shoulders, much like I did once a long time ago.

We both pause and look to Kiba, almost as if we're asking permission to go forward; to see if he still thinks it's a good idea to continue on. But he just dips his head in a nod and turns about face. "Right. This way." He then starts trotting towards the edge of the forest with Hige in tow, the latter casting a concerned glance over his shoulder.

The fastest I can go with Tsume is a clumsy trot. He hasn't said a word about me assisting him, but I'm certainly not about to bring it up. I feel scared and helpless. Yet despite all of that…I…I'm happy that at least I get to help Tsume in some way. And also that I can be this close to him. His body still feels so warm through his clothes and I relish his musky, heady scent…Poor Tsume. I feel so bad. This is all my fault. He was only trying to protect me and he got badly hurt. My hold around Tsume's waist tightens as does my hold on his wrist. Tsume's golden eyes flick over to me.

"Hey kid…What…the hell is your problem?" He asks breathlessly and I feel him reluctantly lean on me a little bit more.

But I say nothing. I put all of my mental energy into focusing on our steps to try and keep up with Kiba. My vision blurs over with tears, but I blink them back and try to beat down my self loathing and pity, lest I get berated by Tsume for being weak. "Nothing…" I murmur and look straight ahead. "It's nothing."

* * *

**Uh-oh guys. It's getting a little harder for me to write this :( that only happens when I'm about to lose interest in a story. I really hope that doesn't happen. I'll just have to go back and watch some episodes again. But reviews really help me. Anyways, sorry that not much happened this chapter. The next chap will have some extra juicy stuff in it kay? ;)**

**Anyway, thanks for reading and thanks to ChocoPokkin for the idea.**

****The next chapter will be more eventful and will have a special TxT moment, so please tune in. Bye!**

**And now, an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams**

_Let's see. Okay so last night on 7/30/12 I had a dream that I was driving in this old fashion car through the middle of town. But for some reason, this wasn't like an ordinary car. Like, the gas and brake pedals were like a bicycle pedal, and they were located behind me. So I had to like lean forward and rest my elbows on these elbow rests and steer the car normally but I stretched out my legs behind me to pedal the car and it was really awkward. I didn't know how the hell to stop and go so I kept getting into almost accidents. Eventually the police pulled me over because my driving was horrendous. But apparently, when they took me to the station they didn't arrest me for awful driving. They arrested me because some how they knew that I was a Russian spy and I looked hot. One of the police men guys fell in love with me and my babe-ness and I had a sister there too. They gave us blueberry Danishes to eat for dinner and I refused to eat their _"American garbage"_. Then my dream changed and I dreamt I woke up in my friend's room (because I was having a sleep over with her in real life last night) and she was like 'hey jay, are you gonna help with the yard work tomorrow?' and I was like why not? I got nothing better to do. Then she…put on black lingerie and was like 'come here, sugar ;)' and I was like Nami! No! What the hell!_

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day, thank god.**


	9. Chapter 9

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter nine

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

****Credit goes to ChocoPokkin for giving me this idea****

* * *

I focus all of my energy into putting distance between me, Tsume, and this forest. But after a while I start to feel discouraged. A couple times I glance over my shoulder to see the black brush not as far behind us as I'd like it to be.

I don't know where we're going. We're all just following Kiba, like we usually do. But I'm worried because we can't keep running for much longer or else…Tsume'll…

I shake my head. Now isn't the time to be thinking about that. I need to be strong for Tsume. He's rescued me so many times over the past few days. Now it is my turn…to be his hero.

* * *

I guess I didn't realize how _gigantic_ this forest was until I got outside of it. We've left Mai's main territory behind us, but a long stretch of it off to our left has been following us for miles and miles. It's like it doesn't have an end!

Eventually I think Kiba realizes that we're not going to get away from the woods _entirely_, so he calls out for us to stop and rest. And it's a good thing too. Tsume's usually tan skin is starting to look ashen and he seems a little cold. I'm really worried.

We find a dry section of ground that doesn't have snow on it and I let Tsume down gently. He's not trying to act tough anymore—thank god—and he welcomes the cold, frozen ground as he sits.

"What should we do?" I ask for what must be the hundredth time today. I swear it feels that way.

Though Kiba's response is less than helpful : "I don't know. But we should at least rest for now."

"Hey, ya know what?" Hige interjects with an excited smile. "I bet if we got some food in your gut it would make ya feel better. Whatta ya say?"

"I say it sounds more like_ you_ want some food in your gut, Hige." Kiba says, crossing his arms over his chest.

Hige's cheeks hint a faint pink and his mouth purses into a pout. "Aaaw lay off, would ya? I'm just tryin to be helpful, that's all."

"If you wanted to be helpful you could shut your mouth and go find us something to eat, porky." Tsume growls, though his voice is weak.

Hige opens his mouth to make a retort when all of a sudden his features freeze. His nose twitches and he spins around on his heel to face the long stretch of woods that's by our side. Hige smells something, I'm sure of it. A corner of his mouth pulls up into a lopsided grin. "Well, well. What've we here? And just in time too."

I lean sideways to get a look around Hige and see a small Lynx peering at us behind the safety of a tree. But when I blink again, I see a young girl with brown hair and wide purple eyes peering at us instead. She's seems afraid but…curious too.

"We were just saying that we needed some food didn't we?" Hige says licking his chops and goes to advance toward the girl. The child's eyes go wide and she takes a step back hesitantly.

Before Hige can take another step forward Kiba puts his paw in front of him, stopping his advance. "Wait. Don't, Hige."

"Aaaw, c'mon! Why not?"

"Just trust me." Our leader says and Hige reluctantly stops with an exasperated sigh. Kiba turns his attention back over to the Lynx girl and shows her one of his rare but genuine warm smiles. "It's alright. We won't hurt you. You can come out."

But I don't think she's buying it. Not after what Hige said anyway. I honestly don't blame her. Who in their right mind would trust a pack of wounded, hungry wolves? Despite Kiba's kind words she does not budge from her spot in the trees. I see her purple eyes shift over to Tsume and they flicker with concern.

"You…You came from the _Schatten Wald?_" I'm astonished to hear her voice. It is small like a child's, yet it holds a trill of such wisdom it shocks me. Also, the accent on her words is rough…kind of like German, I think.

Kiba looks just as surprised as any of us that the girl has spoken. "Schatten Wald?" He repeats. "You mean the woods?"

The girl nods her head.

"Yes." Kiba answers. "Do you live here? Do you know of a safe place to stay?"

But the girl remains silent. She is staring intensely at Tsume and it is apparent that she is struggling to make up her mind about something. Her small, delicate fingers are tapping against the bark of the tree as she thinks. All of a sudden she mutters. "Your friend…he is hurt. There are herbs at the waterfall. This way!" Without waiting a second she spins around on her heal and flees into the forest.

"Hey! Wait!" Hige calls and pursues after her. "C'mon, Kiba. We gottah go after her!"

"Toboe." I glance up as Kiba addresses me.

"Uuuh, yeah?"

"Stay here with Tsume until we get back. Make sure nothing happens, understand? We're counting on you."

Kiba's final words settle on me like a lead weight. So much pressure…what if something happens? What if I have to fight? Will I be able to defend Tsume? I clench my paws into fists and swallow my fear. _No more running away_, I tell myself firmly. It's time to make myself useful. "Right." I confirm my leader's order by dipping my head in a curt nod.

"Good." Without another word Kiba turns and bolts after Hige and the Lynx, leaving me and Tsume alone.

* * *

"Tch…God damn Kiba." Tsume growls, shifting into a more comfortable position. "Who the hell does he think he is? Assigning the kid to babysit me; just what does he think I am, helpless?"

"Well…I mean you _are_ hurt Tsume." I mumble, trying not to be offended, and instantly fall quiet when Tsume shoots me an irritated glare.

Who am I kidding? He's right. If I had someone like me to protect me when I was hurt…well, I wouldn't feel too confident about it either. I shake my head again to get all of the bad thoughts out. _That's enough_. I say to myself sternly. _You're never gonna stop doubting yourself if you keep thinking those things. Tsume's hurt, and I have to protect him, even if it means having to fight._ I exhale and try to stay calm.

Things are quiet between me and Tsume after that…it's starting to make me feel a little uncomfortable. I feel like I should say something, like maybe apologize for getting Tsume caught up in all this…no, I can just tell that would make him angrier. Suddenly an idea strikes me that makes my entire face light up. I know how I can help Tsume.

"Hey, I know Tsume. Why don't I clean your wounds for you?"

"No, Toboe. That's alright." He says softly, his golden eyes shutting.

My face falls. "Hunh? But why not? Don't they hurt?"

"I said it's alright, Toboe." He says, this time a little bite in his tone.

I decide to take a different approach this time. "But if we don't clean them then they could get infected and you could get sick." I shift closer to Tsume reach out to him. "I don't wanna think about what would happen if-"

"I _said_ I'll be just fine!" He snarls, swatting my hand away.

Any trace of a smile I have left slowly fades into a small frown. Likewise, I feel the happy excited feeling I have in my chest fizzle out to leave disappointment and confusion. I don't know why he doesn't want me to get close to him but it still hurts my feelings all the same. My amber orbs fall down to the frozen earth and I mumble a "fine" as I go back to my place beside him. I stare down at my hands in my lap and keep my legs crossed, making sure I keep all my extremities away from his personal space.

Silence falls over us again and I'm convinced that he's mad at me now. _Stupid. Stupid idiot, why did I have to be so insistent on cleaning his cuts? I should have given him more room. I shouldn't have kept pestering him like that. Now he's even angrier at me…haaw…_But still, I can't help but be worried about Tsume. I peek an amber eye out to glance side long at him. I can see that his wounds are still oozing, and there is blood over his leather jacket that's both fresh and dried up. I feel a seed of worry sprout in the pit of my stomach. Whether he wants me to be near him or not, his wounds aren't going to get any better if we don't clean them. Then of course my worrisome mind goes off on a tangent.

_What if Tsume does get sick? What if we're not able to help him and he gets worse? What if he…he…_I can't bear to even finish the thought in my mind. I try to calm down and bring myself back to the moment at hand. I open both eyes to look at Tsume sitting beside me. _There, see._ I tell my self-conscience. _ Tsume's sitting right there and he's fine. So stop worrying about everything._ But then my worrisome mind makes an excellent point yet again. _But…then again…When someone dies of an infection nobody _expects _that it was going to happen. So even though he looks fine now…_

Well, whether the threat is real or not, it _is_ possible that this could be the last chance I have to talk to Tsume: alone or otherwise. Knowing that, I decide to try strike up meaningful conversation.

The silence that's been around us feels so thick and permanent, it's hard for me to speak up at first. "…You know, Tsume." I start off quietly. "The first time I met you back in the city, I was just so surprised to see another wolf other than myself that I wasn't sure of what to say. I mean, I had grown up all alone with granny inside her house…so I never really thought about there being other wolves, ya know?…"

I dare a glance sideways at Tsume to gauge his expression, but he is just staring straight forward with an unreadable expression. _Well, at least I know he's listening_, I think before I continue. "If I'm honest, I'd have to say I was a little scared of you the first time I saw you. I'd heard all these mean things about you from the crows and cats near the trash heaps that…I wasn't really sure what to think. And then to top it off you looked all mad with your sunglasses on and we were alone in an alley way." I chuckle softly and then fall quiet. "But then…but then you came back and you saved me from that guy and I thought…maybe you weren't so bad. Maybe people were just jealous of you so they made up mean stuff about you."

Tsume's expression is still blank and he is staring straight ahead. I don't know if any of this is really sinking in but it feels good to get all these things off my chest. "Then after you told me to get lost—the second time I mean—all I can remember thinking was_ if he didn't care then why did he save me? _I mean to be honest to this day I still don't know…"

Tsume is silent.

Well, I've said all I had to say. I don't expect Tsume to feel the sam-

"I was just so stinking tired." Tsume suddenly starts and I actually stop breathing to listen to him speak. Mostly from surprise but also because I dare not make a sound for fear that he might remember I'm sitting here and stop actually telling me how he feels. "I was just so god damn tired of all the lairs I'd surrounded myself with in my old life. Everywhere I turned, there was someone just waiting to stab me in the back. They were all nothing but superficial, two-faced, human bastards…I knew I couldn't trust them anymore. But then I ran into you and you were…different, I guess."

I can tell that this must be getting a little difficult for Tsume because he never, ever openly tells someone how he feels. Ever. I try to make things more comfortable for him by staring straight at the ground and by training my face into an emotionless mask.

"After all the deceit and lies I'd dealt with from my pack—I mean…my gang— I just…haa, I don't know." He growls and faces the other way. "I guess I just found you kind of…refreshing."

I'm powerless to try and stop the brilliant smile that stretches across my face.

Tsume notices my overly happy look and sticks his nose in the air. "I guess you could say that's why I let ya stick around for so long." He says trying to sound detached but I know better. He sighs and shakes his head. "I thought you'd have to be some sort of _idiot_ to not be scared of me. Or much less _want_ to follow me around." His brow furrows while he speaks, as if he's thoroughly confused. "You were different from the humans in my gang. You were wolf, sure, but you were also…"

"Annoying?" I dare to joke, a smile quirking one side of my mouth.

"Honest."

My amber eyes go wide. I didn't expect him to say that.

"You were so honest with yourself. And to me, a stranger you hardly knew…That honesty was something I hadn't felt in a long time, Toboe. And it was…refreshing." He closes his eyes and says the last word breathlessly.

I feel my cheeks heat up and a little tightening in my chest. I…I don't know what to say. All this time I thought he never really acknowledged me until he discovered that I was a girl. But to find out that I actually affected him like that when we first met…I don't know. It touches me somehow. I enjoy my little taste of bliss for a moment when I'm suddenly reminded of Tsume's welfare. I hate to ruin this moment, but it seems to me that now might be a good time to try and persuade Tsume since he's in a good mood. "Tsume…please. Won't you let me clean your cuts for you?"

He sighs. "I'm not sure that's such a good idea."

"But why? You're gonna get sick Tsume if we don't. We're gonna have to clean it at some point-"

"Alright _fine_." He relents with a low growl and I blink in surprise at his tan slender fingers quickly undoing the buckle and zippers to his leather jacket. I _was_ trying to be persuasive but…I didn't think it would work. "Just be quick about it."

Tsume winces as he peels his grey undershirt away from his blood crusted skin. I know I should feel sorry for him but I…I'm just too busy _looking_ at him. My amber eyes are lost drinking in his evenly tanned skin. Lean, corded muscles shape his arms and shoulders in a delicious manner, making my mouth go dry. His shoulders are so built and they look strong. I see other small white scars littering his skin on his arms and ribs, but none are as big as the one in the middle of his chest. Not for the first time I wonder how he got it. The planes of his chest are wide, flat and smooth…it makes my mouth water. Well, besides the whole_ bleeding _part of it. His abdomen ripples in well developed muscles that end above the hem of his pants. I scowl down at that particular piece of his clothing. _Hello, I was looking at that._

"Toboe." Tsume murmurs gently, snapping me out of my oogling. I feel my face heat up in embarrassment. "Quit fooling around."

"Erm, right!" I was so sure of what I had to do a minute ago. But now…aaaagh, I don't know where I should sit, what side of him I should be on, if I should be human or wolf—for crying out loud. Ever since Tsume took his shirt off I…I'm just so flustered I can't think straight!

I can see that Tsume is becoming increasingly irritated as I poke around. Well no wonder; He must be frigging cold. In the pressure of the moment I decide that sitting on his lap would be the best place to sit. I feel my face heat up as I straddle his waist. Tsume stiffens under me but otherwise makes no move to shove me off. _What am I doing? _I think to myself as I size up his wounds. _This feels so dirty, sitting on top of his lap like this._ I give myself a mental slap and try to stay focused. _Would you stop thinking of naughty stuff for once and just be helpful? _Right. Putting all things sensual out of my mind, I lean forward and begin cleaning.

I flick my tongue out between my teeth tentively to taste the warm tang of blood. Tsume breathes in a tight breath through his teeth and I make a note to try and be gentler. I close my eyes—unable to stay focused while looking at his chest—and slowly and gently lick along his deep cuts. I hear the frozen earth crack below me as Tsume digs his claws into it. His breaths are coming out in short huffs through his nostrils, making his chest rise and fall in a fast manner. I move up to the shallowest parts of his injury. Maybe if I start with the easy stuff it won't be so hard for him. But instead he produces a tight 'ngh' sound and furrows his brow. I feel so bad. I really am trying to be as gentle as possi-

And then I feel it. Something as hard as bone throbs to life beneath me and pokes the underside of my sex.

_Oh…so _that's_ why he's panting._

"Aaah…Damn it." He growls, his eyes shut tight. I can't tell if he's embarrassed or really turned on. "I knew I shouldn't have…" But he can't seem to finish his sentence.

_Could he be…enjoying this?_

"Toboe, hurry it up, will you?" He snaps irritably, totally disregarding the fact that it is indeed _his_ boner that's poking into me.

But he's not talking to me anymore. He's talking to my overly confident, instinct driven, sex drive that's not about to take orders from a man she has pinned down beneath her. _No…I don't think I will,_ She smirks_._

My naughty tongue strays away from the gore on Tsume's chest to lap away the dried up blood on the planes of his chest. Tsume sucks in a small gasp in surprise. Now I'm not just using the tip of my tongue. I hungrily press my tongue flat against his skin and lick upwards, coming close to touching his even tanner nipple.

"Toboe…" Tsume warns, but who is he fooling? He knows he wants this; _I_ know he wants this, so why is he trying so hard to not participate? "Aaah damn it, I knew I shouldn't have let you be the one to do this."

Oh? So was that why he was being so short with me earlier? What a dumb reason. How could he possibly think _I_ wouldn't enjoy this? Or that I would be offended if he got turned on?

"It's not that…"He says in a tight voice and I flush a dark shade of red when I realize I must have just said that out loud. "I just…I'm afraid that I won't be able to stop myself like last time."

"But…" I feel the butterflies in my stomach start to do summersaults at what I'm about to say. "What if I don't want you to stop?" I look up at him through my thick, brown lashes and I can see that two separate halves of his mind are battling for dominance right now.

My body is moving of its own accord now. My fingers reach up and play over the lean muscles of his biceps. They're so firm and smooth. Feeling him like this makes that place deep inside of me heat up and clench with longing.

I hear Tsume take in another surprised breath and a moment later his skin crinkles with goose bumps beneath my fingers.

My breaths are coming out in soft, excited pants now. Since Tsume hasn't stopped me yet I don't see a logical reason to stop. I play the tip of my tongue across his angular collar bone upwards towards the crook of his neck.

His breathing gets harder and his head tips back a little. "Toboe…knock it off." He growls, and I feel the muscles in his arms clench with restraint. He really thinks that he's going to hurt me doesn't he?

"But Tsume…" I whine and bring my lips up to brush against his while I speak. My brows shoot upwards and I feel my face heat with color as I say. "I…I really like you."

All of a sudden his hand shoots up behind me really fast and pushes the back of my head forward to connect my lips with his. His slender fingers fist in my honey brown hair. His kisses are fierce and hungry: They connect together, briefly molding into one another before he departs and kisses my mouth at a new, delicious angle. "Fuck it…" He growls ferally against my mouth, his golden eyes shining. "Do whatever the hell you want to me."

His words make something inside of me snap and suddenly, I lose my restraint too. Despite his wounds, I press my front flush up against him and groan into his mouth as I grind against the lump straining against his pants. I gasp into his mouth as the sensation that blooms down there. Aaaw the friction is incredible and…he's so _hard_. The space between my legs aches so badly. It feels wet and hot. I want him in there so bad that it almost is unbearable.

Tsume gasps at the grinding sensation too. He makes a low rumbling sound in the back of his throat and slides his hands under my shirt and up my back. His fingers are so rough and cold.

"Aaah…" They're _really _cold. But it brings me goose bumps and I like it.

My heart is beating so loud I can hear it hammering in my ears. His lips disconnect from mine with a soft smooch noise. A string of wetness still connects the tip of his tongue with my now rosey bottom lip. With a groan he burries his face into the crook of my shoulder and starts doing so many things at once: At first, I shiver from just feeling his hot breath fan against my skin. Then I feel the sharp bite of his fangs and then the gentle caress of his tongue. It sends electrical waves of ecstasy shooting down my side and flock to the place between my legs, stock piling the effect from the grinding earlier.

I fist my fingers in his short silver hair and pant. "Aaah haa…Ts-Tsume." Even_ I_ blush at how breathless I sound. It was almost like a moan.

His mouth leaves my shoulder and he takes my head between his hands. He exhales a shaky breath and presses his forehead against mine. "Toboe…don't say my name like that."

In my adrenaline, and hormone induced high all I can do is blink in confusion. "Hunh? But…why not? You don't like it?" My fuzzy mind can't piece it together.

"No, you idiot." He growls. "If you keep moaning like that I'm gonna lose my damn mind."

Maybe I _want_ to see what happens when he loses his mind. When he loses all his restraint and does what I've been wanting him to do to me since he put me under his spell in those woods so many nights ago. But my omega instincts kick in, telling me to keep my mouth shut…for now.

Before my brain can even get back up to speed I feel his cold fingers slip under the collar of my shirt. I take in a sharp breath from feeling just how cold they are, but I suppose he has been sitting out here for a long time. His fingers trace over my collar bone while his lips find their way to my throat. I feel just the very tips of his fangs brush against the large vein on my neck. It's such a dominant thing to do, it makes my omega blood sing and makes me shiver. Oh god, it's getting _so_ hard to be quiet. To not say his name when that's all I want to say. I faintly hear the buttons to my shirt go _snap…snap…snap_ as he undoes them painfully slow. He leans down and runs the tip of his nose across the pale, soft skin above my bound breasts. I shiver again.

"God, I just wanna get rid of these…" Tsume growls against the apple of my throat, tugging on a strand of my bandages.

My mind feels like it's wrapped up in hot cotton. I can't think, see, hear or even _smell_ straight. All I'm aware of are of Tsume's hands exploring me…slipping under the back of my shirt and down my back…under the hem of my pants to squeeze the globes of my ass.

"Aaah…Tsume…" I finally can't take it anymore. I have to say it.

All of a sudden Tsume's hands fly up to my hips and hold me in an iron grip. I whimper slightly from surprise, but also from his claws digging into me. I start to pant as he grinds his hips upwards into the soft mound between my legs.

"Didn't I tell you not to say my name like that?" He growls against my open, panting lips. His golden eyes are hungry and leering at me. "This is what happens when you don't do as I say. Is this what you want?"

"Aaah-Tsume!…"I cry out, uncaring how embarrassing I sound. God he's so dominant, so strong, so _hot_. I just want to feel him everywhere on me-

"Uhm…eh-hem."

We hear a voice clear their throat above us and we literally scramble off each other. Well, it was more like a jump on my part. My mouth gaping in shock, I look over to see Kiba and Hige standing a few feet away from us. Both male's cheek bones are dusted with a light blush, but their expressions couldn't be more different: Kiba seems uncomfortable and is trying to look anywhere but at us, while Hige is watching with eager brown eyes and a goofy grin on his face.

"Oh no. By all means continue, you two. I was enjoying the show."

"Oh would you just shut the hell up?!" Tsume snarls, but I can see that he's blushing too. He's moved to sit in an awkward position to try and conceal his erection but…well, I mean it might as well be on his frigging _forehead_ if it were any more obvious.

"We followed that girl into the woods to get you some herbs…" Kiba says, still refusing to look at us. He reaches into his pocket and produces a handful of dark green, shiny leaves as proof.

"But apparently it seems that you're doin just fine anyway." Hige finishes where Kiba left off.

Oh god. Oh my _GOD_! I've never been more embarrassed in all of my life. How long were they standing there? Were they…did they listen to what Tsume was saying? And my shirt is all hanging open and I was frigging _moaning_ for crying out loud…god I'm sure my face is redder than my shirt right now.

Our group falls into a heavy awkward silence that I don't know how to break. Kiba, of course, is the one to break the uncomfortable spell and steps forward to kneel next to Tsume. "Here." He says, offering Tsume some of the herbs. "Put these over your wounds and apply some pressure. When they wilt replace them with new ones."

Tsume takes them from our leader without a word, staring into the distance.

I look down at Tsume who has his gaze firmly fixed on the herbs in his hand. I wonder…is he embarrassed too? I don't think I've ever seen Tsume embarrassed about anything before.

I don't think I've ever been in my pack for a moment where I _didn't_ want there to be silence. But oh god I…I'm so flustered and the silence is so uncomfortable I pray for something—anything—to happen to take our minds off of it.

A twig snaps to our left and it would seem that my prayer has been answered. It is the Lynx girl again. This time she is brave enough to stand clear in front of the trees and stare us all valiantly in the eye.

"It's you again." Hige murmurs.

"Thank you for showing us where the herbs were to help our friend. But…why did you help us?" Kiba doesn't waste any time beating around the bush.

He raises a good point: Not only are we a potential threat to her but if there's _four_ wolves instead of three her odds are even worse. So why…?

The child is silent as she turns to fix her purple gaze on the _Schatten Wald_ we've left behind us. When she turns back to look at us, her brow is furrowed in determination. "Any enemy of that wretched witch is a friend of mine." Is all she says before she spins around on her heel and flees back into the trees.

* * *

Things are uncomfortable between all of us for a while after that. We realize that our spot out in the field is a little too obvious, so we reluctantly move into the stretch of trees to our left. But this time we have taken extra precautions: No one is to go off into the woods alone and someone is to always be up standing guard while the others sleep.

We do this for three days until Tsume's cuts start to heal over. Those herbs are really something: Usually injuries like Tsume's would take five or more days to heal. But regardless, I'm just glad that Tsume is doing better.

Another day or so later Tsume is doing just fine and I couldn't be happier. He's as good as new and we can finally start up our journey again! Although…as of late, I have to admit: I'm starting to have my doubts about searching for paradise. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't _believe_ in it. I just…it feels like we aren't _getting_ anywhere. We've been to a lot of places since we've left Freeze City in search of paradise but…I don't think we've found anything that's brought us significantly closer to it. And I don't think I'm the only one who feels this way…

"C'mon, runt!" Hige calls over his shoulder.

I snap out of my daze and realize that I've yet again fallen behind our group.

"Get a move on or we'll leave ya behind!" he calls and I rush over to our pack. The last thing I want to be is alone in these woods again…

I can tell that Hige and certainly Tsume are starting to have their doubts too. Only Kiba seems confident of where we're going. But he's always like that about everything.

All of a sudden I hear a wretched noise shrill in the air. My hands rise up to cover my ears instinctively. It sounds like a bunch of loud cicadas mixed with a whole bunch of other obnoxious sounding machinery.

"It's an air ship…" I hear Hige murmur beside me. His head is cocked to the side as he listens to the awful noise. "It must be one of the noble's."

"Ugh, I _hate_ that sound."I mutter and feel my brow furrow.

Kiba and Tsume don't even have a chance to say anything before we see a large flash of red light and then the crash that follows from one of the ship's laser beams striking the ground.

"Wah!" I cry and instinctively cling on to Hige. "What's going on?!"

"Wow, they're really goin' at it." He says.

_They_? I look up to the sky and realize that there's _another_ smaller ship that's desperately dodging the bigger ship's laser beams.

Everything is happening so fast. The next minute we hear a terrible explosion and now the small black ship is plummeting out of the sky. My first instinct is to run _away _from this plummeting ship, because I think it's a safe bet that this thing's going to make a really big explosion upon impact. But leave it to Kiba to be the only one running _towards_ the crashing air craft. _What on earth is he_ doing_?_

"Kiba!" Tsume yells and takes after him. Me and Hige quickly follow suit. Really, what has him so worked up? His blue eyes are fixed on the sky as he runs full speed through the forest. He's not even looking where he's going. If that were me, I would have tripped the first second in.

He leads us through the forest and up the sheer face of this really high cliff thing. Normally I wouldn't have followed him at all but…Ever since that air ship crashed I've been able to _sense_ something. It's not really like a smell, but at the same time it is. It's more of a _feeling_, you know? It's kind of hard to describe but I realize that whatever it is, it must be the same force that's been driving Kiba on all this time. And I desperately want to find out what it is.

We finally reach the summit of this cliff and I feel this heart pounding, mind tingling anticipation feeling course through me. It's so strange. _What_ is making me feel this way? I have to know. The scent of flowers is getting stronger and I know it must be a Lunar flower. But there's…more than just the flower scent. Even more than the scent of that noble mixed in with it.

We come out through the line of trees and my mouth pops open at what I see. An unintelligible noise passes through my lips as I look at not the beautiful garden, not at the cascading waterfalls, or even at all the beautiful flowers blooming near the water's edge. No. Across from us there is a maiden garbed in a light pink suit perched on a rock in the middle of a spring, basking in the moonlight. She perks up, as if sensing our presence, and turns to smile at us with _all_ red eyes.

That feeling I've had since the beginning of the air ship crash exponentially explodes to a hundred times stronger and I take in a loud gasp of breath.

"It's her…" I hear Hige say beside me.

Without knowing why, I know that this person is the very reason I set out on this journey. She is the one we've been searching for all this time. It's her; the flower maiden. And without even speaking a single word she has left me dumbstruck and completely breathless.

Kiba shuffles forward away from the safety of our group. His blue eyes are fixed upon this maiden as if he's completely mesmerized. Despite Tsume's hushed warning he continues toward this strange but beautiful girl standing in the water until they are standing but a few feet from one another. Under his breath, I hear Kiba mutter a name I've never heard him say before. "Cheza…"

I see a warm smile slowly register on the girls face and she kneels down in the water to hug Kiba while he's in his splendid white wolf form. Over the gurgling of the water, I hear her utter these words in a soft and gentle voice: "We meet at last."

* * *

**Uuuuugh sorry I know the ending wasn't all that great but that's what happens when I have to switch back and forth between writing and watching the wolf's rain episode. To be honest, that's what I've been dreading about bringing in more characters :/ because then I would have to conform with what happens in the anime episodes and either paraphrase what happens make my writing look crappy or write out word for word what happens. Ugh. Just…no. Do not want.**

**But anyways this is chap nine and I don't know if I'm going to have a chance to write any more of this before school starts: I'm an honor student, attending college full time, and I have a part time job soooo….once the semester starts I might not update…as much or even at all :[.**

**Personally I'm a little self conscious of the whole smexi scene between TxT but if you thought it was good and you wanted more let me know. Or if you hated it and thought it was too much let me know. Any feed back at all would be nice. **

**Please review if you read to the end. I always do for your stuff and I'd appreciate the same courtesy.**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams**

_So a couple nights ago on 8/…14?/12 I had this dream that I was Maka Albarn from Soul Eater and I was out walking in the woods alone. I don't know why—training I guess?—but I didn't have my scythe with me. Anyway I came across this hole in the ground that was ringed with white stones, almost as if someone had placed them there for decoration. I can't really explain how, but for some reason every fiber of my being was screaming at me to jump in to that hole. There was just something drawing me to it. So I did, I jumped in the hole, and when I came out on the other side I was in this dream world place (a dream world inside a dream world? Dreamception) or maybe it was more like a fairy realm? Whatever. Ok so I guess in order for a person to stay in the dream world you would be presented with a challenge when you first entered. And if you won then you could stay there forever but if you lost…well, ya died. And it wasn't a clean or simple death either. I mean like REALLY creative deaths. So when I went into the dream world for the first time I came to this Amazon area and a park ranger that worked there was like "Okay so for your first challenge you gottah jump in this here river and scoop out all the poisonous snakes that are swimming in there!" We were standing on a bridge above this really wide and fast river in a jungle some where and when I looked down I could see yellow and black striped snakes squiggling in there. And I was like how in the fudge! But before I could even finish she jumped in there and grabbed a handful of snakes and was like "There! It's easy. Now you try." But I still wasn't ready to try so I made this fat kid in front of me go first. Well…needless to say he wasn't a very strong swimmer and got washed away with the current and then all the snakes ate him. Then I was like Uhhm…could I maybe have a _different_ challenge? So then all of a sudden Soul was with me (as my scythe) and I was pitted against Justin the Guillotine guy who's like a major villain psycho guy in the manga. But for some reason I wasn't scared at all when I was fighting him. I was like Yeah bitch! Bring it on woooo! Probably cuz I was Maka :/ So then I beat the shit out a Justin and I chose to live my life in the dream realm. But my redhead, over protective, father in the real world wanted me to come home and I was like but if I go back to the real world I'll have accomplished nothing there and I would have just wasted all this time. I had like a family and everything. But then I tried crossing over to see what would happen and me and my family were all transported to the real world._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	10. Chapter 10

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter Ten

By a Midnights Dream

*credit goes to Chocopokkin for giving me the gist of this idea ;)

Disclaimer: All characters(except for some), items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

"I like this." I smile, looking out the rusted window pane of the decrepit old bus I'm hiding in. "This idea of friends waiting for other friends. It's really a nice feeling…" I close my eyes and allow myself to relish this peaceful state of bliss because…sadly I have a feeling that it won't last long.

My companion next to me says nothing and a brief silence grows between us.

"…Know what I mean?" I say, trying to lighten the tension and turn towards her with a friendly smile.

Cheza, the flower maiden.

I've been given charge to watch over her while the others scout an escape route out of the city. She's only been with us for a day or so but already she's demonstrated some of her amazing powers! Seriously, it's like Cheza was _made_ for us wolves. Her voice is so soft and gentle on our sensitive ears. And she smells really nice all the time, but it's never overbearingly strong like human perfume. She's nice and light and her touch is so gentle. I really like having her around.

Though…That's more than I can say for Tsume. Ever since Cheza's showed up he's been really wary of her, but in my opinion I don't think she's done anything untrustworthy. I suppose that's just Tsume's nature. He was wary of me too after all when we first met. I guess he just needs some time. But still, he doesn't have to be so mean to her like that…Speaking of Tsume…

"Aaaaahhh…." I groan and slap the heel of my hand to my forehead as I remember the awkward moment in the snow field. The averted glances and deafening silence may have only lasted a few minutes, but I'm _still_ feeling awkwardly uncomfortable and mortified about the whole thing. I just keep replaying that scene over and over again in my head: me on top of Tsume, grinding his crotch and moaning like a wild animal…And then Kiba and Hige walking in on us-ugh! How embarrassing! I still haven't completely gotten over that, and don't I think Tsume has either. It just seems like his movements around me are more controlled lately, like he's afraid to touch me. He probably feels embarrassed anytime he looks at me. I blush and whine further.

"Is something the matter?" Cheza trills in her sweet sing song voice.

"Hunh? Oh-uh no, I guess…well…I mean…mmmnn…" I whimper, unable to adequately express myself.

"It is alright." Cheza reassures and places a hand on my knee. It sends a thrill through me that I can't fully explain. It is invigorating yet…calming. "This one understands."

"Hunh?! Y-You do?" I blink my eyes in disbelief as she nods her head. How could it be that she's so in tune with me? Honestly I've barely just met her and she knows what's going on with me better than I do.

"You are confused about Tsume, is that right?" she asks and I have to avert my gaze as I blush and nod my head. "Do not worry. Tsume says harsh things and acts unkindly because he is afraid of what others will think of him. He wants to be strong and independent. Though he might show you coldness, this one is certain he cares for you. This one can feel it." She places a delicate hand over her heart and lets her magenta eyes close.

I feel my heart skip a beat. "You really think so?"

Cheza smiles in a way that makes her whole face glow and nods her head reassuringly.

I'm powerless to contain a relieved smile from sprawling across my face. I don't know why, but talking to Cheza has really made me feel a lot better about this whole situation. Before I can stop myself I throw my arms around the flower maiden and squeeze her pleasantly in a hug. I keep forgetting she's blind and I feel a little bad when she gasps from surprise. But she quickly forgets it, smiles and pats my arms. "Thanks Cheza." I smile, "Thanks a whole lot!"

* * *

"Okay, ready? When Kiba walks in and sees we're not here, we'll jump out and surprise him okay?"

"Toboe, are you sure this will be alright?"

"Of course! C'mon we'll only be having a little fun. Don't worry Cheza- Ooh! Here he comes! Ready…?"

I perk up my ears and listen intently for the thudding of Kiba's steps coming into the bus. _Thud, thud, thud_ there they are. He's stopped now. He must be confused because he doesn't see me or Cheza around. Now's our chance! All at once me and Cheza jump out from behind the bus's front seat and shout "Aha!" to surprise Kiba. I wait for the look of shock, and then laughter to register on my leader's face. But it doesn't.

Kiba is stoned faced and unamused.

It's then that the awkward silence sets in. "Uuuuhh….aha ha. What took you so long?" I say trying to act nonchalant.

Thankfully Hige enters the bus then and starts talking about the humans that are surrounding us. This topic of conversation and Tsume's absence starts to make me a little nervous. Where is he, anyway? Then Tsume's musky scent of sunshine and crushed cedar needles fills the cavity of the bus as he too steps inside. I feel my gut lurch and my face bloom with color. I quickly drop my gaze to the ground, unable to look him straight in the eye.

"I've found an escape route that'll be perfect for tonight." His voice echoes off the bare, metal walls.

"That settles it then." Kiba concludes. "We'll leave at sunset tonight."

I dip my head in agreement and feel a surge of anticipation. I'm not even worried about getting out of here alive tonight, I'm just happy that I won't have to sit around in this stupid bus anymore.

The guys take up different spots in the bus and for the time being they all relish the chance to rest before our big rush tonight. I feel a little down. I can practically feel the distance between me and Tsume like it's a physical wall. I sigh. Then I start thinking about what Cheza said:

'_Though he might show you coldness, this one is certain he cares for you. This one can feel it…'_

Her reassuring words soothe me a little bit and even fill me with just a touch of happiness. I'm the type of person to give myself good advice but…I don't know…for some reason it always convinces me if someone else says what I'm feeling. Especially about Tsume. I mean, it's not that I didn't _know_ that he cared for me. That much is obvious, but I'm just so insecure that if someone else reassures what I'm feeling, I believe it, you know? And even more so because Cheza said it. She's so in tune with us wolves, I bet she was reading into Tsume's feelings when she said that. So it's probably a fact!

Knowing this I…I don't know, I just feel like I should _do_ something for Tsume. Just to let him know that I care too, even though I might not blatantly show it all the time. What to do though…I sit on the floor of the bus tapping my fingers against my pant leg. When suddenly it hits me: I'll get him a present! Yeah, won't that be great? I bet I could find something lying around here that Tsume might like. And I've been inside this stinking bus all day, I need some air.

"Rrrraaagh!" I yawn, stretching and standing up. "Hey guys, I gottah take a whiz."

"Ugh, TMI." Hige says, wrinkling his delicate nose.

I make a face at him. "I'm gonna step out for a bit. I won't be gone long."

"Make sure you're back here before dark." Tsume gruffs as I pass by him. His voice gives me shivers. "If you aren't then we're leaving without you."

At first his words hit me like a cold wind. _Would he really leave me behind like that?_ But then I just smile and dip my head. I know Tsume wouldn't do that to me. He's already proven that multiple times. He just wants me to know that he's really serious. For once I marvel at how much better I'm getting at reading Tsume. "Kay…" I murmur softly and walk past him out of the bus.

* * *

We're stationed in a junk yard so you think there'd be a whole bunch of neat stuff lying around, right?

Wrong.

There's absolutely _nothing_ here. It's all garbage: rusted, metal, muddy, stinky, garbage. Aaaw what was I thinking? This _is_ a junk yard after all. I guess they don't call it that for nothing. But still, maybe I can find something for Tsume. I really wanna show him what he means to me. That gets me thinking…what sort of things does Tsume like anyway? Probably something tough or cool looking. Maybe I could find some bits of metal and make a cool bracelet out of it for him-no, that's stupid; Tsume wouldn't wear a bracelet…well…I mean, he wears _earrings_ so…

Uuugh this whole thing was just a stupid idea. I've been all over the junk yard and I haven't found anything that's remotely cool or even recognizable…just twisted metal, smelly mold and rust. I'm just about to call it quits when I smell something unfamiliar behind me. But it isn't human. It's wolf.

"Hey, kid." I hear a voice call above me a moment later. I spin on my heel and crane my neck upwards to where the voice came from. There's a male standing on top a high pile of scrap metal, staring down at me with an expression that's irritated but at the same time apprehensive. He's tall, and of the lean body type and has short, light blue hair that falls in front of his two-toned eyes: One a dark purple, the other a greenish aqua. _Geez,_ I think, momentarily forgetting the situation, _what is up with all these irregular colors lately?_

I don't have a chance to think any further. I hear the rushing of wind against his clothes as he leaps from the peak of the scrap pile and lands with a heavy thud in front of me. I gasp and take a step backwards.

"What're you doin in my junk yard?" His voice is a menacing snarl and his lip is twitching over his teeth. He starts advancing towards me keeping his strange eyes locked on to mine.

"Uuuhh n-nothin. I-I was just playing around." I make an effort to speak up and avert my eyes down to the filthy ground. _Stay calm, stay calm Toboe._

"Oh _really_?" He asks and I have to look up at him. He's leaning in closer to me with his hands on his hips and one blue eyebrow cocked. "You expect me to believe that you're just out here _playing_ and not trying to steal my territory?"

"Hunh? I wasn't tryin to steal anything of yours. Honest. I was just coming out here for some fresh ai-"

"Don't even try to pull that crap on me, kid!" He interjects. "I know _exactly_ what you're up to."

_Crap_, I swallow and clench my fingers into fists to keep them from shaking. _He's not buying it._ A very small, feeble voice wells up from a very dusty part of my psyche and whispers something in my ear: _defend yourself. Fight, don't flight._ You know what brain? You're right. I'm tired of running into trouble and having to depend on others to bail me out. It's high time I fend for myself. I square my shoulders and force out a wobbley voice."W-Well if you're so smart then you would know that I was just poking around." _Yeah, that's right. You tell him Toboe!_ My inner self cheers. My heart is quivering with uncertainty but I need to learn how to fend for and stand up for myself. "If you don't want me here then I'll just leave." I stick my nose in the air and begin to walk away.

"Wait!" He calls, and there's something pleading about his tone that makes me hang back. "Uh…I-I mean rrrhmm, Alright. I'll forgive you this time, since this is your first offense."

_Hunh? Is he serious? But just a minute ago he was all-_

"On one condition." His sentence ends with a playful grin.

_Oh crap,_ I swallow. "w-what is that?" I ask hesitantly.

His lips spread apart in a wide, toothy grin. "You have to play one of my games with me."

* * *

"Hunh?" I say, and I'm sure my face must look as confused as I feel. Seriously, first he's stand-offish, now he wants to play a game with me?

"And I'll tell ya what, I'll be nice and let you pick what game we'll play: There's hide and go seek, chase, and- my personal favorite- 'gotcha'. I made that game up myself." The male said beaming with pride.

"….Uuuuhh." I'm….sort of too confused to know what to say. Should I be wary of him? Should I consider him an enemy? But he seems so…playful.

"Oh right, I should probably tell you my name first; My name's Youji, and this is my junkyard. What's yours?"

"Uuuhhm Toboe."

"Well that's a really stupid name."

"Hey!" I yell, feeling my cheeks sting from embarrassment. "Who asked you anyway!"

"Jeez, settle down kid. I was only joking." He mumbles, averting his two-toned eyes. "So what'll it be?"

"Now wait just a minute." I say, feeling my resolve flaring. Seeing his withdrawn face only fuels my drive. "You get all in my face, demand to know what I'm doing in _your _junkyard, and then you make fun of me when I try to leave? You're not very nice, you know that, mister?"

Youji worries at his bottom lip and stares at the ground with a subdued face. "Gee I…I'm sorry…I was…I was just lonely, that's all." His hand comes up to scratch the back of his blue head.

I feel a pang of sympathy in my chest despite myself. "…What do you mean lonely?" I ask him softly.

"Well, I mean…I don't get a lot of visitors. And my boy…he said he would be back, told me to stay here but he…" He sighs through his nose and shakes his head.

"Your boy?" My brow furrows and I roll the word around in my mind, wondering what he could mean. Certainly I don't think he means a son…so… I gasp. "Wait, do you mean…your owner?"

Youji nods his head.

Now that I take a closer look at him, I realize that Youji can't be much older than me. He might even be a little bit younger. "Well, where is he?" I glance around the junk yard, half expected said boy to be hiding behind some junk playfully. But there is no one.

He shrugs. "I don't know. He just walked away and told me to _stay_." He pauses and his eyes take on a mist, as if he's recalling an unhappy memory. "His face smiled at me but his eyes seemed sad. I don't know why he told me to stay but I always try to listen and be a good boy because it makes him happy…but…"

"…But what?"

"He…hasn't come back."

"What…you mean for a couple days?"

"No. For six full moons."

My eyebrows shoot up at this. He's been waiting here that long?

Silence stretches between us and I think I hear a very faint whine die in his throat. But it could just have easily been a rusty hinge swinging in the wind. Youji blinks his eyes and quickly replaces his crestfallen look with a painful grin. "Aaah but what am I getting all worried about? He's probably just out there lookin for me, that's all. He'll be back…"

I feel a tightening in my chest that makes my eyes water and my lower lip tremble. _Poor Youji…what kind of owner would do this to him?_

"…So, whattaya say? Will you play with me or not?"

It's not all _that_ late out, but I really don't want to be away from the others longer than I have to. Kiba has a tendency to initiate his plans early. But…Youji…I understand his sadness, the grief of a loved owner that's never coming back. I can't…I can't just _leave_ him here like this, alone and sad. I grip my shirt over the area of my chest where there is an aching sensation. I can at least give him my company, even if it's only for a little while. I'm sure it will mean a lot to him. I dip my head in a nod and smile. "Sure. Let's play chase!"

* * *

He's behind me. I can feel him almost on me. The closeness of his breath and the sounds of his paws are so close behind me, tearing up the earth, making the hairs on my shackles bristle. I look back and my fears are confirmed. He's close, and the time I spent looking back at him has given him a few extra seconds to creep up on me.

I abruptly turn in a sharp angle to throw him off and he spends a good two seconds reeling and trying to change his direction. We both shift back to humans and I shriek in exhilaration as I turn and see him advancing upon me fast with that wide, playful grin of his.

"No! Don't catch me!" I squeal and hold in a fit of giggles. If I start laughing he'll surely catch me. I'd forgotten how fun it was to play. For the longest time I've been running and running but there hasn't been a shred of playfulness in the type of running I've been doing. I've been running to escape, to search. But for once the pumping of my legs and the rush of air in and out of my lungs fixes giddy smile into my cheeks. For the first time in a long while I'm enjoying myself.

Suddenly my body pitches forward and the ground rushes up to greet me with a solid thud. I land on my back. The impact stuns and knocks the wind out of me. I blink my amber eyes open and gasp to see that Youji is on top of me, smiling. His skin is flushed and his flat chest is heaving slightly from catching his breath.

"'Gotcha'." He laughs breathlessly.

"Haha, oh yeah. Heh heh you got me real good!" I say laughing like a goof.

Youji's smile quickly turns to a wolfish grin and without warning he lunges at my throat with an open maw of fangs. I shriek but feel the tips of his fangs halt just about the vein on my neck. _Whew, oh yeah._ _I forgot, _this is all part of the game; Youji's game called 'gotcha' which actually turns out to be quite fun, even though he wins all the time. You chase your opponent around until you tackle them on their back and then you _'get them'_. But not really, it's just a harmless game. I then join Youji in his laughter.

All of a sudden I smell something that makes my girly giggles fizzle out. A familiar scent tickles my nostrils: Sunshine, pine, and sweat. A heady, musky, and masculine scent that at any other time would set my loins on fire. But now, it makes the floor of my stomach drop. I don't even have to turn my head to know that Tsume is standing ten yards away. Watching us.

And that's when I consider what this scene between me and Youji would look like to an outsider.

_Oh god._

I hear his boots thudding loud and quickly over towards the two of us.

"No, Tsume don't-"

But he is too quick. Before I can even finish my sentence he grabs a clueless Youji by the scruff of his shirt and whips him hard into a pile of metal. My jaw drops open from such raw power. A startled whimper laced with pain shakes past Youji's lips.

"Tsume!" I cry, concerned for Youji's welfare. Youji hardly has time to recoil before Tsume is on him again. With hardly any effort Tsume grips him by his shoulder sleeves and lifts him up to eye level, giving him a slam against the scrap metal for good measure and then holds him there. Youji whines and braces himself for a punch that doesn't come.

Tsume balls his fist in the fabric of Youji's shirt and pulls him close so that their noses are nearly touching. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't tear your throat out right now." He growls through his teeth.

Youji's eyes are wide and a faint whimpering noise escapes his lips.

Quickly, I scramble to my feet and race to Tsume's side. "Tsume cut it out!" I say frantically. "He didn't mean to hurt me-"

"Stay out of this, Toboe." He growls.

"But you don't understand: he wasn't hurting me, we were just _playing!_" The words leave my mouth in a rush and the look on Tsume's face does a 180 from livid to shock. The silence that follows after makes me blush.

"…What?" His voice is steady and dangerous. It's even, yet brimming with an anger that's only beginning to boil, like a red hot cauldron that's holding molten iron. His golden eyes slide in their sockets to look side long at me.

"We…were just playing together. That's all." I mumble quietly.

"You were _playing_ together?" He asks incredulously, as though he doesn't believe me.

I nod my head.

He turns his narrowed golden gaze back to Youji and releases him. Youji slides down to his bottom with a petrified look on his face. Before I even have a chance to apologize Tsume grips my paw in an iron grip and starts pulling me away. I nearly stumble. Oh god, I can tell just by the way he's holding my hand that he's angry. "We're leaving. _Now_." He gruffs and leaves no opening for arguments.

"But Tsume I-"

"Toboe!" He snarls and reels around on his heal to face me. I shiver at the heated glare he shoots at me. Why can't I ever keep my mouth shut when my alpha tells me to do something? "Tell me; are you some kind of idiot or something? This _guy_ is a stranger, an outsider. How could you let your guard down like that around him, after all you've been through?" He releases my arm and gives me a pointed glare. "Haven't you learned _anything_?"

I feel my cheeks sting as I'm being chastised. He's right. All those times I've fallen into situations like this one. I never seem to learn. And every time, who is it that risks his life to come to my rescue? Tsume. He has every right to be angry at me. I wish I wasn't so trusting or gullible but it's just who I am. I wonder if I'll ever learn.

"And just who _is_ that guy anyway?" He growls softly, crossing his arms over his chest. "And why the hell were you playing with him?" It's something about the way he stresses the last word that makes me think he's not really upset with the fact that I was playing, but rather…that I was doing it with another male.

I look down at my toes ashamed and feel my cheeks heat up. "Gee I…I'm sorry Tsume…" I mumble and close my eyes.

"Sorry's not good enough this time, Toboe."

My head snaps up at this. He's leering down at me with a hooded gaze and a single hand on his angular hip. I search into his half lidded golden disks for an answer with my own amber orbs but they are unreadable as a closed book.

"I am so sick of having to wonder if you're out here sticking your nose into places it shouldn't be." His golden eyes flit over to Youji, who's sitting on the ground trying to follow along the best he can with our conversation. He turns his attention back to me and sighs, exasperated. "It's like you're a god damn puppy or something!"

"Hey pal, why don't you leave her alone."

Both of our heads snap over to Youji who is standing with his shoulders squared and defiant towards Tsume.

"…What did you just say?" Tsume's voice is low and dangerous, like a cobra's hiss, and he turns his narrowed gaze round towards Youji.

_Oh no. _I panic, _Please Youji, I know this looks bad but please just be quiet._

"You heard me. I said why don't you just leave her alone." Youji's two-toned eyes are firm and determined. He might have been frightened of Tsume a moment ago when he surprised him but it's clear from his actions now that Youji is not a coward. It takes a lot of courage to stand up to Tsume. I should know.

Oh dear lord, Tsume is starting to walk towards him. His gate is slow and warning. "You stay the hell out of this. This isn't any of your damn business. "

"Oh yes it is!" He says. Youji clenches his fists and shifts about uncomfortably as Tsume draws nearer. "You made it my business by treating her like this. I won't let you treat my friend that way!"

"You've got a lot of nerve, you know that?" Tsume is only a couple feet away from Youji now. He stops and bares his fangs at the shorter male. "You talk pretty highly for someone who just had her pinned to the ground with your fangs at her neck." Tsume raises his hand to strike Youji and the younger wolf braces for impact. "You stay away from her."

"Tsume don't!" I cry and jump in front of Youji.

Tsume's hand halts just a few inches away from my face. His eyes go round and incredulous.

"H-He's right, Tsume." I stammer. _Oh_ _god, what am I saying_? The words leaving my mouth don't even sound like I'm saying them. It's like the wires in my brain short circuited and my mouth-to-brain filter rerouted to the _'word dump'_, the place in my cerebral cortex where all of the things I'm _not supposed to say_ go. "Listen I-I know what I did was wrong but you don't have to be so mean about it. A-And for another thing you shouldn't try to hit Youji. That's really rude and besides, he didn't do anything wrong. So just leave him alone, alright?"

"Are you serious-" He starts to shout but then abruptly shuts himself down with a cool sigh. "…Whatever. Stay here with your little _boyfriend_ and _play _all you want. It's not like I care or anything." Tsume connects one last leer with Youji and holds him there for a moment. The two males stare at each other before Tsume hooks his thumbs in his pockets and strolls away, his eyes straight ahead. Just like he always does.

I can't tell but…I think I really just hurt Tsume's feelings. It's so hard to tell. That handsome face of his is always trained into a mildly irritated mask, never faltering to allow anyone to see what he really might be feeling underneath. He _says_ he doesn't care...but Tsume says a lot of things that aren't always true, especially when it comes to how he feels. My hand reaches up and grabs the fabric of my shirt over my heart. It hurts…to be honest I kind of forgot Tsume even has hurtable feelings, you know? He does such a good job at hiding them...

"...Who was that guy?" a faint voice murmurs behind me, startling me. I forgot Youji was standing there. "Is he your boyfriend or something?"

"Hunh? Well…no…he's not." I say glumly and stare at my toes.

"He's not? Well then where the hell does he get off treating you like that? Who does he think he is?" Youji asks, only pumping himself up further.

"Well he's not my boyfriend but he…hnnn…" _He cares a lot about me and he's worried. I'm just being a stupid child about things like always. That's the only reason why he's so angry with me. And now I basically just told him to go take a hike. Ooooh I wish I could tell him I'm sorry…I'm such a bone head. Why do I always have to mess everything u-_

"Hey!"

"Whoa! Oh, uh- what?" I feel the tips of my ears heat up from having been caught not paying attention. Though my mind is still worried about Tsume…

"I was just saying that you should stay here with me." Youji beams.

"Oh, uhhh…" He can't be serious.

"I'm totally serious! Think about it: if you stayed here we could play all the time, and you wouldn't have to worry about that guy yelling at you anymore." I flush as I feel Youji slip his hand into my own. It's warm and uncalloused, a hand that has not known the harshness of hard labor or the pursuit of paradise. "For the first time in many nights I wasn't lonely anymore. You made me happy…" I don't think he knows it or even means to, but he looks at me with sad dog eyes that twinkle in the waning evening light. "I wish you'd stay…"

I feel a lump forming in my throat choking any words from leaving. I shake my head."But I can't do that."

"Why not?" He looks at me and dear god those eyes of his are almost _begging_ me to stay.

"Because I…" _I love Tsume._ I feel a wave of heat flush across my face that travels all the way up to the rounded tops of my human-like ears. I've never even allowed myself to think that before but it's true. Sure, when I started this journey I was looking for paradise but along the way I found something more. I found a male that I'm hopelessly entranced with and for some reason he doesn't mind keeping me around either. At least…I hope he still doesn't. As much as I'd like to say otherwise, even if this trip suddenly stopped being about searching for paradise I don't think I would mind. Just as long as I was with him…I'll have my own paradise.

Suddenly, a pungent scent wafts into my nostrils. The gritty metal smell of gun powder, leather, and gun polish. Youji can sense it too, and tenses while turning towards the direction of the bus the others are staying in. _The humans_, I think, my eyes going round. A moment later a barrage of bullets shatter the still night air. I hear their flying metal bodies pierce the rusted body of the bus and the flickering lights from the shooting casts the dead junkyard carcasses into stark shadows before the shooting abruptly stops. The cacophony of noise slowly dies away with an echo when a man snarls in fury. "They're gone!"

Confusion between the men ensue, and I know that my pack has escaped. Just like I thought before, Kiba initiated the plan early. Perhaps…I think with a sinking feeling, maybe that's why Tsume had gone out looking for me earlier, to come and find me because we were leaving. He had come to get me even when he said he wouldn't...fresh salt gets added to my wound. Either way I've made up my mind: I can't stay here. And I can't in good conscience leave Youji here to their devices. They're looking for wolves; If they found him he'd probably be shot at.

I clasp my hand back in his and stare firmly into Youji's two-toned eyes. "Come with me."

"Hunh?! Where?"

"There's no time to talk! If those guys find you here you'll be killed." I start to pull him along but Youji digs his heals into the ground. "Mnnn! Come on! We gottah go _now_. What's the matter with you?" I grunt, straining from the effort.

"I _can't_ leave." Youji says in a desperate voice resisting me further.

"Nnnnn, why not?!"

"Because!" He sobs. "My boy told me to _stay_."

I finally snap and say what I've been wanting to say since he told me he'd been waiting along for six months. "Stop lying to yourself, Youji. He's not coming back for yo-"

"Yes he _will_." Youji screams, and I stop pulling. Youji's hands are clenched into fists at his side and are quivering. "…He will be back for me…" He's staring at the ground with watery eyes, blinking them rapidly. "…I have to stay here for him…"

I swallow with indecision and my amber eyes flicker back and forth from Youji, to the road out of here, and back to Youji again. He won't budge, and nothing I say or do will convince him to come with me. I can't waste any more time here. I have to catch up with the others before I'm caught. But I'm still worried about Youji….

But there's nothing I can do about it if he _chooses_ to stay here. Sadly, I have to leave him.

"Well Then…" I murmur. "I guess this is good bye."

Youji refuses to look up at me but nods his bright blue head. "Yeah…I guess it is."

For a brief moment we are left standing in a sort of awkward silence. I think I should leave now but...it doesn't feel right to. The suddenly Youji's paws pad softly over to me as he closes the space between us. Without warning he tucks a finger under my chin to tip my face upwards towards his and captures my lips in a soft kiss, making my amber eyes go wide. I'm stunned on the spot and am powerless to stop this hot, smothering feeling flush through my entire body, like my entire body is blushing. His hand reaches up to twirl a lock of my honey brown hair and that's when I snap out of it. I shove him away roughly, just as my hormone induced brain tells me to hold him closer, for more. Youji's mouth, now slightly pink, hangs open in a small o as if he wasn't expecting me to say 'no'. He swallows and turns away, forlorn.

"I get it.._._it's that guy, isn't it?"

"Youji, I-"

"Just save it..." He says with a pained voice and turns to me with a sad smile. "It's alright. I'll be just fine."

The sadness in Youji's eyes puts a clamp around my heart. He's making it so hard for me to just leave him here like this. He's already been abandoned once before, how many times is fate going to keep doing this to him?

'_Check over there!'_ A man's voice calls and we hear the thundering of the soldier's boots.

With one last wistful look Youji smiles and whispers, "Goodbye." And then leaps somewhere where I can no longer see him in the darkness.

'_Quickly! I heard voices over here!'_

I turn about-face on the heel of my boot and start booking it for the exit out of here. I cast my glance over my shoulder one last time desperately trying to see where Youji could have gone, then I reluctantly pull my gaze away and follow the other's scent.

* * *

**Weeeeeellll hello there, loves! Long time no see ^^ *sees you pick up chair* Wait, what are you doing 0.o ? oh shit! No please! *Crash* I'm sorry! I'm sorry-have merc- *SMASH* I can change! *THWACK***

**Ok…. ~ ok I deserved that. I know, I turned into one of **_**those**_** authors. I wrote a really awesome story, got all of you into it, and then basically dropped off the face of the earth for three months. I'm really sorry about that. But you should know that I'm not a good multitasker. Just ask anybody. So during this fall semester I had to put this story aside for the sake of my grades. But now that the semester's over I can at least think about it ^^ yay! So here's another chapter for you. Still don't know how I'm going to end this thing but hell! I'm just gonna keep rolling with it until I think of something!**

**And also I'd like to mention that Chocopokkin did suggest the basic idea for this chapter, however Youji is my own personal character whom I've created and I hope you all find him an endearing, lost, big puppy ^^ I kinda went back and juiced up the ending. I noticed that is sucked a little so I made it better.**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_So a few months ago I had a dream that I was Gark F*cking Oak and I was running down this wharf because the police were chasing me. I'm not sure why though: maybe it's because he's ten years old and doesn't have a license and drives around without his seat belt on in a red, convertible sports car…but I digress. So anyway I pulled a pokeball from my back pocket and whipped it through the air and cried out "Boo! I choose you!" All of a sudden Boo the ghost from Mario came out and did his scary face. So I grabbed on to his squishy body and both me and him dove into the water. But I could still breathe and shit. And I was like haha, stupid fucking cops, they can't get me in here. All of a sudden this searing, sharp pain explodes in my foot and shoots up my leg. I cried out and looked back to see it was a snapping turtle biting on my big toe (which when you think about it doesn't make sense because snapping turtles are fresh water animals but I was obviously in the ocean…whatever).__It hurt so bad, I was sure he had taken off my toe. I dug my thumb into his eye sockets but he still wouldn't let go of me. And then I thought I could try to pry his beak open with my fingers. And it worked: he let go of me and then drifted away. I really don't remember what happened after that._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


	11. Chapter 11

**-My True Identity-  
**Chapter Eleven

By a Midnights Dream

Disclaimer: All characters(except for some), items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.

* * *

The sound of my boots thumping on the concrete gets louder and more frantic the farther I progress from the junk yard. I don't know why I'm running so fast. It's not like the human's noses are _nearly_ strong enough to smell me, and at this point I'm far enough away that they can't even see me. But…If I'm honest with myself…I don't think it's the humans I'm running away from.

Once I'm sure I've put enough distance between me and the yard I stop to let this heart breaking pain over whelm me. Youji…All these emotions are swirling in my head, flying around in crazy directions, like someone's come along and shaken a snow globe. A someone named Youji.

"Haaaaww…" I whine and grip my honey brown hair. "What's wrong with me…?" It's not even about how Youji makes me feel. How nice he is to me or how gentle he is in comparison to my dark, silver haired, tight leather clad prince. What's really making this difficult is that dead look he had in his eyes when I told him goodbye. It's the fact that he's back there _alone_ at the mercy of those machine gun wielding monsters called men. It's the fact that he'll _stay_ there alone...indefinitely…

I inhale and try to calm down. _Just calm down, Toboe,_ I breathe. _You're dramatizing things again…_

For a moment, I struggle to make up my mind. My paws don't know whether to carry me forward, or backward. Every moment that passes puts more distance between me and the others or quite possibly puts Youji in danger. I wanna go back and comfort Youji but…I can't leave the others. I can't leave Tsume. Finally making up my mind I resolve that even if I do see Youji again, I will keep my distance from him. It…will be for my own good. And his. Dipping my head down I continue to run forward.

* * *

Kiba and Cheza's scent has been still for a while now. At first it makes me nervous, but if I know Kiba he's got everything under control. The spicy, floral aroma that's Cheza's scent slowly grows stronger with every corner I turn, every alley I cut through. Just when I think her scent couldn't get any thicker I round a corner and almost run square into the back of both of them. "Oh!" I yelp in surprise because Cheza's already turned around and smiling at me, as if she anticipated exactly when and from what direction I would arrive.

Her smile broadens so wide it makes her crimson eyes close.

I feel her smile strike and warm me like a ray of sunshine. It instantly soothes my jangled nerves and warms me inside. "Uhhhh, hi Cheza." I chuckle. My voice startles Kiba and he whirls around as if he hasn't noticed I was there.

"Toboe, there you are. What took you so long?"

"Eeeehh…Sorry Kiba. I guess I lost track of time." I chuckle sheepishly scratching the back of my head. _Though…I know what I was _really_ doing_, I think to myself glumly. But apparently Kiba doesn't pick up on my melancholy.

"Well, I guess it doesn't matter. So long as you're here now. You ready to go now Cheza?" My leader looks to the flower maiden with such a look of tenderness it makes me blush. I…don't think I've seen Kiba look at anybody that way. Ever.

"Not yet." Cheza says, still smiling forward.

Kiba's brow furrows in puzzlement. "But…You said you were waiting for our friend. I thought you meant Toboe?"

"Yes. That is true. But this one was also waiting for him."

Kiba's confused look only deepens. "Who're you talking about?"

Instead of offering an explanation, Cheza just smiles on and points to the end of the alley where I just came from; where it's terribly dark. I can see a tall, dark form slowly advancing toward us from where Cheza is pointing.

"Toboe." I hear Kiba mutter and I nod my head, already knowing what he wants. I take up Cheza's left side as Kiba takes up her right and we both assume a defensive position. My heart pounds with the pretense of confrontation. But I steel my nerves with even breathing and I stand my ground. I'll protect those who are important to me…Wait...I know that scent.

_Tsume?_

"Who are you?" Kiba calls and the form halts just as they're about to step into the light.

For one suffocating moment, no body moves. The dark form in front of us hovers between the boundary of darkness and faint moonlight, keeping him concealed.

We hear the noise of air being sucked in, and then released in a heavy sigh. The person steps out from the darkness and I feel my jaw go slack in surprise.

"Youji…" His name leaves my lips in a breathless whisper.

Kiba glances side long at me. "Do you know this guy Toboe?"

But I can't answer him. I'm not really sure what to say right now. _Oh god_, I feel my face heating up again. "Youji." I finally force out and blink my amber eyes in confusion. "I thought you said you weren't leaving?"

"I know…I did say that, but…" He takes another breath to pull himself together and then lifts his gaze to look steady at me. "When I thought about you out here alone on the streets, with those guys hunting you down, I couldn't just stay behind. I wanted to make sure that you got away _safely_. So I followed you to show you the quickest way out of the city. But…I didn't know you had other friends." He murmurs, his two toned eyes flitting over to Cheza and Kiba. Then he dismisses it with a shake of his head. "But it doesn't matter. Follow me and I'll make sure you guys make it out of here." Youji is about to turn around when Kiba interrupts him.

"And just why should we trust you?" Kiba is looking at the other male with his usual emotionless, passive face.

My eyes flit over to Cheza, but she is looking at Kiba. Her expression looks troubled, as if his scrutiny of Youji has hurt her feelings.

"Kiba…" She whispers, placing a hand over her chest.

Our leader's blue orbs are fixed on to Youji, but the younger male does not squirm under his intense gaze. "You guys are headed in the wrong direction." Youji continues. "If you keep going this way you're only going to end up looping around on yourself."

Kiba is silent for a while before he responds again. "Thanks for the warning…" He murmurs, and then turns around on his heal and heads in the opposite direction of Youji and me.

"But Kiba…" I call.

Suddenly Cheza starts walking towards Youji and Kiba stops to turn toward us now.

"Cheza?" He asks, but does not make a move to stop her. Youji watches her advance with wary eyes. The flower maiden raises her hand and gently places it in the center of his chest. A shudder ripples through Youji and his face droops into a lonesome expression. The same is reflected upon Cheza's face, as if the both of them are experiencing something: emotions, memories, scents, images all at the same time. They both open their eyes and Youji swallows.

"…You've been hurt." Cheza says softly and Youji averts his eyes. "This one has felt your pain as if it were her own. Who did this to you?"

Youji's eyes glass over with wetness and he avoids looking any of us in the eye. Then he raises his gaze and connects his half lidded eyes with mine and I feel a pang of sadness resound within me. "…The escape route is this way..." He murmurs and does not wait to see if we will follow. He turns and begins walking in the other direction.

I look to Kiba to see what he wants to do next, but he's looking at Cheza, I guess waiting for the same thing. Cheza turns to my leader with a blank expression. "He is not lying." She says mainly to Kiba. "We can trust him, this one is certain of it."

Kiba furrows his brow and looks at Youji's retreating back profile, mulling over our next action carefully. After a brief pause he whispers: "Alright then. Let's go."

* * *

We're all following behind Youji now and so far he hasn't looked back at me even once. I don't know why but I get this feeling like Youji's trying his best to ignore me and keep his distance…though I have a vague idea why. I hope it isn't because I broke his heart back in the junk yard. I think _my_ heart would just about break if that was true. I have to wonder: who he was thinking of when Cheza said someone had hurt him? Was she talking about his owner or…was she talking about me? I feel guilt settle in my stomach like a thick puddle of lead.

But something's been on my mind ever since he showed up; I have this feeling that Youji didn't follow me out here _just_ to show me the way out. I think that maybe he had something he wanted to say to me in private, but now he can't say it because Kiba and Cheza are here. So I swiftly weave through both Cheza and Kiba to walk next to him. Perhaps it's just my imagination, but I feel like he tenses from my proximity. He doesn't look down to acknowledge me and I pretend that it is because he's engrossed with sticking to his route, and not because he doesn't _want_ to look at me. Because it is too painful.

"Youji…" I whisper and he replies with a soft _'yea?'_ "Did you really only come out here to show us the way out of the city?"

"Of course I did. What else would I be doing?"

_Oh…ouch_. I didn't expect his answer to hurt me as much as it did, but I can't deny how disappointed I feel now. And I guess that also answers my next question if he changed his mind about coming with us. I feel all of my optimism quickly getting sucked down the drain. Silence lapses between us.

"…You could still leave, you know." I start off delicately. I know this is a touchy subject for Youji but I feel like if I just push him a little more... I see the male clench his fists but other than that he shows no reaction.

"Toboe…You already know my answer on that." He says, his tone final.

I whine and let the conversation drop. _Well, I gave it one last shot_. If he doesn't budge now then he's probably not going to change his mind about it. I'm the type of person to push someone if I think I'm right. But it's clear that Youji's made up his mind about this, so I know I'm not going to get anywhere by pressuring him. I've learned to recognize when it's time to back off.

We continue to walk on in silence for a while, cutting down deserted streets, walking through abandoned buildings to stay hidden. We come around a corner and suddenly Youji comes to a stop. It's so abrupt I almost walk straight into his back.

"Hunh? Why did we stop?"I murmur softly, but no reply comes from my friend. I lean to the side to look up at him and see his two toned eyes rounded in horror. _What is he looking at?_ I wonder and look down to the end of the street where I see a deteriorated, condemned building with its roof collapsed in. I can hear his breaths start to become frantic and he slowly shakes his head. I look from the building, then back to Youji. _What in the world is the matter? Is there an enemy down there?_ What has his him this upset?

"Youji-?" I begin to ask but before I can complete my sentence he takes off down the street in a mad dash. "Ah? Wait!" I call and chase after him. _My lord_, why is he running so fast? He just looked up, saw this building, and now it's like he's possessed or something. Just what about this broken down place has him this worked up?

Youji comes to an abrupt spot in front of the structure and sucks in a loud gasp of air.

I come coasting to a stop next to him, my eyes trained on the shadowy skeleton of what I think used to be an apartment complex. I look through one of the windows on the top floor and can see the starry night sky through it where the ceiling used to be. My eyes flit over to Youji. It could just be the lack of light, but it seems to me that his face has drained of all color.

"Youji?" I ask, concerned. "Are you alright?"

Youji doesn't even look like he's heard me say anything. He subtly starts to shake his head as droplets of tears form along the outer rims of his thick eyelashes. "No…no…" starts whimpering but…I have no idea why.

"Hey!" Kiba calls, having finally caught up to us with Cheza. "What's going on?"

"I-I don't know." I say, becoming increasingly nervous. I don't like it when my friends are scared or in pain. But it's even worse when they are and I don't know _why_. "Youji just saw this house and started acting all _weird_."

"…He said he'd be back for me…" I hear him whimper.

I turn to face Youji again. "What?" I feel my brow furrow in confusion. He means his owner, right? What does his owner have to do with this crummy, run-down, abandoned, old house? "What do you mean, Youji?"

Youji's face crumples in despair and he slowly sinks down to his knees. His eyes, still locked on the building, are glassy and shine with tears. He blinks and two stray droplets trail down his cheeks. "You said you'd be back for me…" He whispers again. But I don't understand: _Who_ is he talking to? "He's gone…he's _gone_. But why…? Why didn't he…come back for me?" Youji places his hands on the ground and hangs his head to whine. A sob racks his body and the reason for his sorrow is only beginning to sink in for me. "Didn't he love me? But why? _Why?_ I loved him so much….I just wanted to be with him, why did he abandon me like this…?" Youji's becoming more and more hysterical, to the point where his glamour's beginning to slip and I can see the faint outline of his wolf form. He throws his head back to cry but when I blink again he's transformed into a dazzling, silvery grey wolf and lets a loud, sorrowful howl ring from his muzzle. I look to Cheza and to my astonishment I can see silent tears streaming from her crimson eyes, her beautiful face slightly crumpled with pain. She's experiencing Youji's pain, his sadness, his loss along with him.

"Toboe!" Kiba cries. "Make him stop that! The humans will hear us!"

"Aah! R-right! Youji!" I say, quickly kneeling down beside him. "Please Youji, we have to be quiet." I plead and the male drops his muzzle but continues to whine in heartbreak. The very sound of it makes my eyes tear up and I have to cover my mouth to stop my lower lip from quivering. His wolf body starts trembling and he shuffles closer to me, pressing his forehead against my chest. _Poor Youji_… Tears threaten to spill out of my eyes as I wrap my arms around him and squeeze him with all my might. Look at him: he's just a loyal, innocent, loving dog. All he ever did was love this person, and he got tossed away like a piece of trash; like he didn't even matter. I feel my teeth clench in anger when I see an imaginary image of this so-called owner conjure up behind my eyelids. For the first time in my life, I feel my stomach coil in hatred for someone that I've never even met. How could someone _do this_ to him?

I hear three very faint footsteps and suddenly Cheza is kneeling by our side. "Cheza?" I ask, blinking my eyes curiously.

"Youji…" She calls softly and his whimpering gets softer as he turns to look at her, though I can still feel him shivering. Cheza holds out her arms and beckons him with a warm smile. "Come here." She says softly. Without waiting for him to move, she leans in and wraps her arms around his light grey form. Youji's whimpering ceases all together and his shivers decrease. Cheza rubs a hand soothingly up and down his fluffy back and starts whispering a song into his ear.

Her sweet voice drifts over to me and I feel my skin crinkle with goose bumps. The melody casts this weird calm over me; almost as if I'm about to fall asleep. My body feels like it is floating in water…rocking me back…and forth…soothingly. It wipes my sorrow away and soothes my hot, angry stomach. Youji's ears start to perk up a little bit and his shivering stops all together.

"You have been wronged…" Cheza starts off softly. "You loved someone with all your heart. But in the end you meant nothing to them."

"Ah! Cheza…" _Oh my god. Was that supposed to be _comforting_?_ I expect Youji to start crying again at what she said but…his mood seems to be getting better. Maybe Cheza somehow knows just what he needs to hear right now. I should never have doubted her for a moment.

"It is not your fault. You must not blame yourself for what others have done to you." Cheza pulls away and holds his furry head in her hands. She beams down into his two colored eyes: One a completely golden and the other partly gold with a rich brown tingeing his lower iris. "You are a good boy, Youji." Her words are soft and simple, but they have such a huge impact on Youji he involuntarily reverts back to human form where he is kneeling in front of Cheza. His expression glum, Youji reaches up and grabs a hold of Cheza's hand that still cupping the side of his face. His two colored eyes close and he leans into the warm, gentleness of her touch.

"All this time…" He starts off softly. "All I've wanted is for someone to tell me that; someone to tell me that I'm needed, or that I'm wanted. I thought that if I devoted myself to somebody, that they would love me back unconditionally…now I know that's not true." His whole face twinges in sadness and for a moment I'm afraid he's going to start crying again.

"Youji…" It causes me so much pain to look at his crestfallen face that I can barely stand it. My arms itch to reach out and hold him, to comfort him and cradle his head against my chest. But I clench my fists and restrain myself. I…promised myself I'd keep my distance from him. And so I will, no matter how much it hurts either of us.

Cheza strokes a hand through his hair and life returns to his glassy, sad eyes. A light blush dusts his cheeks and he looks down at the ground, shy. "And even though it hurts to be rejected like this, I know now that I still have friends who care about me." He lifts his gaze to look up at me and I feel a flush of warmth spread throughout my entire body.

Cheza nods in agreement and I see Kiba walk up next to her side to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Come on." My leader says in a quiet voice. "We need to get moving. There's no telling if the humans heard us or not. Youji? Will you show us the way?"

"Right…" Youji says softly and stands. His two colored eyes are trained on the ground and he sighs as he passes a hand over his face. I can tell that, while Cheza's singing certainly helped, he's still not %100 better. But I don't really blame him though; who could just be over something like this so quickly? _Poor Youji_…I…I know I told myself to stay away from him but he just looks so _sad_. I hate seeing any of my friends that way. _I've gottah do something to cheer him up_.

"H-Hey Youji…"

Before he can even lift his head up to look at me I close the space between us and wrap my arms tightly around his midsection in a hug. I feel my face heat up in a blush and hear Youji's heart beat sputter as I press my head against his chest. _So much for staying away from him, _my nasty subconscious sneers at me_._ I feel the butterflies in my gut fluttering around in there, making me feel queasy with nervousness. Now I'm reminded of just exactly why I've told myself to stay away from him: Just touching him makes me feel all funny.

"Listen…" I start out in a shy voice. "You're a really good person Youji, and anybody on earth would be lucky to have you as a friend. I-I'm…sure glad that you're my friend." My voice gradually fizzles out into nothing because I become more embarrassed as I go on. I feel my face get hot in a blush. Even though I mean every word I said I just hate how corny they sound. I blink my amber orbs in surprise when I feel his two muscled arms wrap around me, gently retuning my hug.

"I know, Toboe…" I can hear the warm smile touching his lips as he speaks. "I am too."

I crane my neck back to look up into his face. Just like I thought, he's smiling warmly down at me and his two-toned eyes are sparkling, making a light blush dust my cheeks.

"Do you…feel better now?" I ask breathlessly. My heart accelerates when I realize that we're still in each other's embrace. His arms don't seem to want to let go of me…and strangely I don't want them to let go either.

"Almost…" His mouth quirks up into a half smile and he trails the soft pad of his thumb over my cheek. I shiver.

I look over to Kiba and flush when I realize that he and Cheza are watching us. What could he possibly be thinking? _You hoe; you know you're with Tsume. How dare you be caught in another man's embrace like that?_ I whine. I know he's right. But as always, it's impossible to tell what Kiba's thinking behind that stone mask of his. Suddenly, I see Kiba's features round in shock. But it's not the good kind of shock…It's the horrified kind of shock.

"Kiba?" I ask, but he's moving at lightning speed, the way only wolves do when they need to protect their friends. He grabs Cheza's hand and leaps backwards into the alley where we came out from. I feel the hairs on the back of my neck prickle. _What's behind me?_

"Run Toboe!" He yells and a moment later I understand why: The pungent smell of alcohol, cologne, and man assails my nostrils and I feel my heart sink with fear. It's coming from me and Youji's left. I whip my head around to look and there stands the dark silhouette of a man with squared shoulders in a long trench coat and hat. The black metal of his shotgun shines in the moonlight. Time stands still for a moment in that narrow alley_…I've been at this end of this gun before._ I open my mouth to yell out to Youji but he sees the man too…and pushes me away just as we hear the trigger _'click'_.

I hit the ground hard, and the ringing in my ears is made worse by the gunshot that echoes off the alley walls.

In front of me Youji grunts in pain and leans over clutching his abdomen where there is a spreading circle of red.

"Youji…no…" I start to say but I'm brought back to the heat of the situation when I hear the old guy reload his rifle_. I need to get Youji out of here: Now. Otherwise he'll kill both of us._ Now _I'm_ moving lightning fast. The way only wolves do when their friends are in danger. The old man raises his rifle and takes aim at my friend. Youji, grunting in pain, doesn't even realize. I fly out of my seat and throw Youji's arm over my shoulders. The drunken man's aim falters and the bullet makes a loud noise as it ricochets off the brick building. I don't see his black shadow dog with him, but I pray that wherever it is it won't show up at this particular moment. Then I would be _totally_ screwed. I grip Youji's hand hard and leap with all my strength, weaving in a zigzag pattern to throw off the human's aim. Once out of sight I keep running, keeping my steps in time with Youji's labored breathing.

* * *

I run and run until I smell all traces of that old guy fade away behind me. I'm not sure where his dog was, but the fact that it wasn't around with him has me very distressed. It's possible that they could have split up and are hunting us separately. To be honest, I'm not really worried about that old guy. But his dog petrifies me. Suddenly, Youji's legs give out and he stumbles forward.

"Ah! Youji!"

"Toboe…" He wheezes. "I can't run any more. Set me down here."

I look around indecisively and swallow nervously. "Well….okay." I murmur and gingerly set Youji down with his back resting against a building. He winces in pain and I can see that his forehead is coated in a thin sheen of sweat. His abdomen is quivering slightly and when he pulls his hand away it is tainted with red.

"Youji…" My breath quivers and my vision blurs with tears. "No…" I sob and my face crumples as the tears come. "No…"

"Toboe, it's not your fault. Don't cry."

_But it _is_ my fault_. _I shouldn't have even been holding you like that in the first place. If I'd just followed my own advice and stayed away from you like I said…you wouldn't have been hurt…_

"I'll be fine." He winces. His fingers shake as he lifts up the bloodied hem of his shirt to expose the gore underneath. "Aaaah….it just grazed my abdomen."

I gag at the sight of blood and turn my face away. I'll just have to take his word for it; I can't even bring myself to look his injury without feeling faint.

"Toboe, listen to me." He pants. "I want you to get back with the others."

"But I can't leave you here. What if that guy-"

"Don't worry about me." He looks up and gives me a rueful smile. "I'll be fine…I just, need to rest for a while, that's all."

That look in his eyes…why do I get this feeling that he's lying to me?

"Listen… I'll be there with you as soon as I can. But…if I don't make it, I don't want you to wait for me, do you understand? Leave, without any hesitation. If I don't make it…well…then maybe it will be God's way of telling me I was never meant to leave this place..."

"B-But Youji…" I whine. "I can't just leave you."

"I told ya to just leave!" He snaps. Shock ripples across my face and I see him look away, hurt for using that tone with me.

I'm so torn. My instincts tell me not to abandon a wounded friend but my omega nature of being told what to do are creating a conflict inside me, making me hesitate. Clenching my fists and my teeth I make the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my life.

The words _'I'm sorry', 'I'll be back for you', 'we'll wait for you'_ all well up inside my throat and bang against the back of my teeth, trying desperately to force themselves out. But I just can't...for some reason I can't bring myself to say them. Or say anything for that matter. Without saying a word I take off as fast as I can down the alley, desperately trying to pretend that there is nothing behind me and failing.

* * *

The plan that Kiba set out was very clear: we're to meet at the entrance to the Forest of Death and wait for Hige and Tsume to meet up with us after distracting the humans at their base. I know where I'm supposed to go, but I have no fucking clue on how to get there. The only thing I have to go on is Kiba's scent, which is moving incredibly fast to be at the appointed spot on time. I'm slightly paranoid about being alone. I always seem to attract trouble when I'm alone…but then again I seem to attract trouble no matter what. I should think that would be obvious especially with what just happened. I feel self loathing bubble up inside me and I have to bite down hard on my lower lip to smite the feeling from crippling me. The last thing I want is to bring trouble where it's not needed.

I keep running and running, being careful to avoid the scent of humans when I smell it wafting around a corner. I run to the edge of town and nearly stumble over the sheer face of the cliff. I look down but a dark gloom clings to the rocks and I'm unable to really see what's waiting at the bottom of it. I sniff the updrafts coming from the bottom of the pit: _yeah Kiba's scent is definitely down there_. And I can smell Cheza's too. I look beyond and see the vast expanse of the Forest of Death. _This must be where we were supposed to meet up_. Taking in a deep breath and shutting my eyes I jump over the side of the cliff and brace myself for that strange feeling of my stomach falling upwards as I plummet to the bottom.

The wind whips against my clothes and pulls at my hair. Then it all abruptly stops as my feet meet the ground with a soft thud. Everything around me is still for a moment; the only sound to be heard is my soft breathing.

"Toboe." A voice murmurs behind me and scares me half to death.

"Waaah! Oh, Kiba, it's you." I say, breathing out a shaky breath of relief. "…Have Tsume and Hige showed up yet?"

My leader shakes his head. "Not yet. But don't worry; it's still early." His brow furrows and he blinks his clear blue eyes in confusion when he sees that I'm alone. "What happened to Youji?"

His question catches me off guard and completely knocks the wind out of me. I feel my heart cripple in pain and I clutch the clothing over my heart. "He…He's-" I swallow my sentence around a hard lump that is forming in my throat. I'd like to avoid this topic of conversation right now, if it's all the same to him. "W-Where are they?" I ask, referring to Tsume and Hige. "Shouldn't they be here?"

"They are here." Kiba says with his usual stone cold face, facing the Forest of Death.

I look at where he's looking but I don't see anybody. I look around myself but they aren't any where either. "Uhhh…but _where?_"

Just then we hear the sound of fabric rushing through the air and we look up just in time to see Hige and Tsume's human forms rushing down to meet us. They soundlessly land in front of us without even so much as a give to their knees.

It's been so long and I've been through so many things since I've last seen Tsume that I've almost forgotten what he looks like…and then that's when I remember the way I treated him in the junkyard. His poisonous, golden gaze rests on me only for a moment before I drop my gaze to my toes, guilty. I feel my face heat up in mortification. Not only remembering how I've treated him, but also how I've been allowing myself to act around Youji. Surely he smells his scent on me…I feel ashamed.

"Sorry we're late." I glance up and I see Tsume speaking to Kiba and sigh glumly. _Great, he's not even going to acknowledge me._

Hige flashes our leader a goofy grin and gives us the thumbs up. "Operation successful."

As always, Hige's goofy disposition makes me smile. I breathe out a sigh of relief, thankful that we all made it here in one piece…all that is…except-

My thoughts are interrupted by the loud noise of a gunshot rippling through the still night air.

"Aah!" I gasp in astonishment and look up towards the top of the cliff where the sound came from. It's that old guy again! He followed us here. But how? He couldn't possibly be that fas-

"You damn wolves!" He shouts and loads the barrel with another shot. "I'll never let you fool me again!"

He aims the barrel of his gun right in the center of our group and…I feel my limbs turn to lead. Being at the end of that gun…it's like my entire body has frozen over.

"Toboe!" I hear someone yell to my left. A firm hand grabs my wrist and pulls me out of the way just as the bullet embeds itself in the ground to my right. I slam into the firm front of a body and the wind leaves me with 'oof'. I open my eyes, look up and blush. It's Tsume.

"Move it!" He shouts and pulls me behind the safety of some trees. "What were you _doing_ just standing there like that?" He snarls. "Are you some kind of idiot, or something?"

"Ah! T-Tsume…" I start but then suck in a gasp of horror when I turn and see Cheza has fallen on the grounf. The guy takes aim at her! No! "Cheza!" I scream and rush to get her, but Tsume holds me back. I struggle in his hold but he holds me tighter. If I don't do something quick-

"No Toboe." Tsume growls as he tries to restrain me.

"But she'll be shot!"

When I look again Kiba's wolf form is in front of her in an instant and a millisecond later a gunshot sounds and I see a rivulet of blood emerge from Kiba's shoulder.

"Ah! Kiba!" I scream.

"Don't watch, Toboe." Tsume says and turns my head away, cradling the back of my neck as he holds me closer. He doesn't want my innocent eyes to witness one of my friends being cut down. I feel so helpless. One of my friends is about to be killed and there's nothing I can do about it. For once I wish I wasn't so weak so I could save my friends and not have to be powerless like this. I look up at the top of the cliff to glare at the old man and something shifts behind him in the darkness. _Who is that?_ I gasp when the person steps out into the light. Bright blue hair is highlighted in the moonlight. Youji!

The old man's arms quiver with drunkenness, trying to keep his aim straight. Youji takes advantage of his hesitation and slaps the butt of his rifle just as he's about to fire, making the barrel go up into the air. The bullet that was meant for Kiba's skull gets fired harmlessly into the sky.

The old man snarls in rage and whirls around to find the perpetrator but Youji leaps clean over his head and plummets over the side of the cliff feet first. I glance back over to Kiba, but he's not even there anymore. That little distraction is all he needed to scoop Cheza up and disappear beyond to the trees into the Forest of Death. The last thing I see of him before he completely vanishes from view is his black converse sneaker. I don't know where Hige's gone, but he's wisely made himself scarce. Everything is deathly quiet and I hold my breath, waiting for the next thing to happen. The old man on the top of the cliff roars with fury and fires the rest of his bullets out into the air.

"Keep your head down, Toboe." Tsume whispers and I burry my nose into his chest, afraid. I even hear one of the bullets embed in the ground close by to us. After a while the shooting stops and Tsume lessens his hold on me. A few more agonizing minutes pass before we dare to glance around the side of the tree. I exhale a sigh of relief: He's gone.

"Haaa…" I breathe out, releasing all of my panic along with it. My heart sputters when I realize I'm still in Tsume's arms…I shamelessly allow myself to enjoy this rare instance of being close to him until he decides to push me away.

"You alright?" He gruffs and I nod my head in answer. "Right. Then let's find the others."

Tsume releases me and without giving me a second glance slips on his sunglasses and heads out into the clearing. He's acting so…_normal_. Anyone else would think that he's not mad any more but I know better: By refusing to talk about the issue we had back in the junkyard it's obvious that it's bothering him. I almost decide to just let it go, and to just follow after him not bringing it up or saying a word about it. But then I think about how inconsiderate I was to him and I can't allow myself to just forget about that. He might be able to forget and move on about it, but _I_ can't.

"Wait…Tsume." I call softly and he stops to look at me over his shoulder. I hate that I can't read his eyes behind those midnight lenses: Is he looking at me? Or is he _glaring_ at me?

"What." He says flatly, a little annoyed when I don't answer right away.

_Crap. God damn it_. I knew just what it was that I wanted to say but the very idea that Tsume is mad at me is making it hard to remember what I had to tell him. I was so sure a moment ago. Where did my resolve go? I start to fidget with the hem of my shirt and fix my amber eyes on his steel-toed boots. "Well…I…I just…wanted to-"

"Would you spit it out already?" Tsume snaps, making me wince. "I don't have all day." He turns to face me with a hand placed on his angular hip.

I feel my face heat up and sting all over. I can even hear the resentment simmering in his voice. He's _expecting_ that I'm going to apologize for what happened, and it's pissing him off. He doesn't want to hear me say any of it, but I can't help it! I _am_ sorry for all this trouble I've caused for us with Youji. It seems to me there's only one way he'll believe that I'm truly sorry. But…I don't even know if he'll believe _that_. Before I can change my mind I clench my eyes tightly and run into Tsume to lock him in a bear tight hug.

"Toboe, What the hell are you-"he begins to growl, but I cut him off.

"I l-love you, Tsume!"

The silence that follows afterwards is deafening. I wait, expecting any moment now that he'll wrap his arms around me and murmur softly into my hair that he loves me too. I'll apologize about how insensitive I was to him in the junk yard and he'll forgive me. Then we'll hold hands and walk away into the forest happily ever after. None of that happens.

Is he smiling? Is he shocked? Is he appalled? Disgusted? I want to look. I want to look at him so badly but I can't bring myself to do it. What if I look up at him and he's trying to hold back his laughter as if it were all a joke? What if he looks annoyed or like he's figuring out how to brush this off? I don't think I could ever get over it if I saw that. Panic turns to doubt; I wonder was this the right thing to do? Was this the right way to go about apologizing and fixing things between me and him? I hold my breath, anticipating his response, but none comes. I still have my eyes clamped and have yet to let go of him.

"Toboe-" He starts to say but abruptly stops. I feel his shoulders shift and I finally open my eyes to see he's looking behind us. I let go of him a little bit to do the same. I can tell that Hige is approaching us even before I see his bright yellow jacket emerge from the dark. I can smell his scent.

Tsume turns back around and looks down at me with…an expression that I find hard to place…I think…it's indecision. His brow furrowed slightly, he gruffs :"We'll talk about this later." And then releases me.

Oh god…just what does that mean? Does that mean he feels the same way but he just doesn't want to say it in front of Hige or does he plan on letting me down gently, and spare me the embarrassment of humiliating me in front of our friend? I can never tell with Tsume. Ugh! And he's even _more _unreadable with those _damn_ nightshades on.

"Let's go." He says, more as a curt order than a friendly invitation. Without waiting for me he starts walking out to meet Hige. I hang my head in defeat, anticipating the worst for our conversation later, and follow him.

Hige appears out of the brush of trees and jogs up to meet us. "Boy, what the hell was that all about?" He asks, scratching the back of his head and looking around nervously. "Pretty scary stuff. Wouldn't ya say?" Suddenly his nose twitches and he whirls around to stare into the gloom. "Oh, it's you." Hige mumbles a moment before Youji's form staggers out from the darkness. "Thanks a lot for the help back there. That sure was nice uh ya…but eh…Who are you?"

Youji does not respond, instead he and Tsume engage in an intense glaring match, neither one willing to look away.

"Don't worry, Hige." I say nervously, pretending not to notice the smothering tension that's in the air. "H-He's a friend."

"Yeah. And that's all he better be." I hear Tsume growl, loud enough for all of us to hear, making me blush.

"And what if I'm not?" Youji replies smoothly, never faltering beneath Tsume's glare. "What if she decides she wants me to be more than that? You got a problem with it?"

"G-guys…"

"I could've sworn I told you not to come around here anymore." Tsume hisses, closing the space between them with slow, purposeful steps.

"Well I have. _Somebody_ had to make sure she made it out of a city safely. I wouldn't want her in…" He pauses to look Tsume up and down. "_Less capable _hands."

Tsume's upper lip rolls back over his sharp white fangs and he removes his sunglasses. "What'd you just say?"

_Oh god._ I've seen this before. Right now they don't look as bad because they're in human form. But the image is always the same: Two male wolves, standing close to each other, bristling and growling and baring their teeth; They're a thread of stiff wire being pulled on each end, tighter and tighter, until eventually it snaps, and both wolves lunge at each other's throat in a flurry of fur and color. Blood will soak the ground and only one will come out alive. They start moving towards each other and I rush forward before I can give it a second thought.

"Guys! Cut it out!" I shout, jumping between them. My heart is hammering in my ears and I understand that they could very well just step around me if they wanted to. My arms feel like they are filled with lead as I continue to hold them up between them. A stifling silence suffocates us for a few moments_. I need to say something. If I don't they're going to just go off on each other again._

"Ah, Youji, how's your wound?" _Change the subject, yes. That will make _everything_ go away,_ my sarcastic subconscious sneers.

"Hnn?" He looks at me as if he hadn't realized I was standing there until just now. "Oh, it's better now, see?" He says and I feel a wave of nausea rock my stomach as he lifts the hem of his shirt to expose a scarlet red line carved over his otherwise flawless abdomen.

"Well enough to fight?" Tsume says and I feel him press against me as he tries to advance closer to Youji. I grab on to his body so he can't advance any further.

"Ts-Tsume…" I plead breathlessly. _Oh please, don't fight. Not here-_

"uuuhh…Hello?" Hige calls, momentarily snapping all of us out of our confrontational stupor. "Did I miss something here? Didn't this guy just _help_ us? Why are we suddenly at each other's throat here?"

"Stay outtah this, Hige." Tsume warns but as usual, Hige rebels.

"And just why the hell should I, hunh? I'll ask questions if I feel like it!" He sasses, placing his hands on his hips. "I don like bein left in the dark!"

"Rrrrrrr, Jesus Christ." Tsume growls under his breath and pinches the bridge of his nose in irritation. "Fine. We're heading forward to catch up with Kiba." Tsume says to me, making Hige's mind up for him much to the lard's dismay. Tsume connects a glare with Youji one last time before he slowly turns and starts walking towards the Forest of Death with his hands in his pockets. "Finish things up here. Don't take too long."

Ahh…just what does he mean by that? Hige lingers behind with us for a moment, probably just to make it seem like he's not going to do what Tsume says. But he soon realizes that he's making things awkward and reluctantly follows after the steel grey wolf.

"So, what will you do?" Says a voice behind me, snapping me out of my daze.

I turn around to face Youji, but sadly I can't bring myself to meet his gaze. It hurts too much to look at him. I know what I have to tell him, and there's no easy way to do this…I can't seem to find the right words. I feel my face heat up as the silence grows between us; my silence itself being my answer.

"…"

"It's okay." Youji murmurs.

My head snaps up at attention to this. _Hunh? It's okay?_ Youji's voice doesn't sound _pained_ per se just…disappointed. He sighs and crosses his arms. How can he say it's okay when it's obviously _not _okay with him? I remember the last time we had to say our goodbyes, it wasn't so easy. Could he be lying to try and make this easier for me? I'm the last person on earth who deserves a courtesy like that, especially from Youji.

"Is it…really okay, Youji?" I ask carefully.

Said male refuses to look at me. Instead he keeps his eyes trained at the ground. He sighs and then begins, "I'm not going to lie to you, Toboe. I do have feelings for you."

I feel my eyes go round in shock and a soft gasp leaves my lips. I mean…I had an _idea_ that he liked me but…I wasn't expecting him to just come out and say it. That's so forward of him.

"You're the first friend I've made in my entire life, and the first girl I've met too. You were so nice to me and actually cared about me…even though we were total strangers. For that reason I developed these feelings towards you. But…I can see from the way you look at that guy-the way you look at Tsume, I mean- that your feelings for him are way stronger than the feelings I have for you. And…I wouldn't make you give all of that up just to stay with me to make me happy." He closes his eyes and inhales a deep breath through his nostrils and releases it slowly. "The only problem I _really_ have with letting you go is that I've seen the way he treats you and I don't like it." His light blue brows meet together on his forehead in upset. "He talks to you like you're beneath him, and you don't deserve that!" He says vehemently.

"I know things seem that way." I start of quietly, trying to think of the right words to say that will convince him of what I know: That Tsume really is a good person, he just doesn't like to show it. I think of all the times that he's come to rescue me or to find me, even when he said he wouldn't. Of all the small things he does, consciously or not, that lets me know that he wants to be close to me. I find the corners of my mouth pulling up into a smile all their own. "And I know this is gonna sound hard to believe but he really does make me feel loved. He's showed me lots of times and despite how mean he looks he's never bared his fangs against me." _I love him…_ "But, what will you do now, Youji?"

"I can't come with you, if that's what you're asking." His words catch me like a blow to the stomach.

"But…why not?"

"To be honest, when I think about traveling with you and your friends it makes me really happy. But…" He trails off and clenches his fists. "I don't think I could ever stand to be around you while seeing you happy with another guy. Me and Tsume would probably fight constantly and…I think ultimately that would be worse than being left here alone."

"But things don't have to be that way." I say desperately, feeling tears form on the brink of my eyes. Wait, why am I begging him like this? Why do I want him to come along so badly? Is it because I'd feel immobilized with guilt if I knew that he were left here all alone, hurt and with no friends? "I just…I don't want you to be alone." I drop my head and reluctantly let a few tears slip out from between my lashes. Something warm and soft slips into my paw and makes me gasp. It's Youji's hand. I look up and he's standing right in front of me with only inches between and is smiling down at me.

"I won't be alone." He reaches up to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear, but then stops himself and lets his hand fall to his side. "Toboe…regardless of how things have turned out, in the end, I'm glad that we met…You're the one who showed me that _I_ was the reason for my loneliness. If we had never met, I probably wouldn't have changed. And I might have lived my entire life in that junk yard, without ever knowing what friendship is. So thank you, Toboe for saving me from myself."

I feel my heart aching like it's being grasped by a hand full of needles. He might be trying to say these things to make me feel better but they're only making it harder for me to say goodbye. Youji releases my hand and turns back to look at the city with a determined smile.

"I'm leaving this place. I'm going to have my own adventure, look for my own paradise and make friends…" He trails off and his two colored eyes slowly close. "My paradise is out there somewhere. I'm sure I'll find it…I'm know I will."

My arms and soul ache to reach out and embrace him. I want to hold him tight and tell him that none of that matters, and he can come with me in the search for paradise…that we can still be friends. But I can't. I dig my nails into the palms of my hands so hard that it breaks the skin. I won't hug Youji and make this any more difficult for him than it is right now.

"You should go." The male says, turning to look at me with a rueful smile. "Your friends are waiting for you."

I look at Youji unabashedly. I drink in the color of his eyes, the shine of moonlight on his neon blue hair and how it dances against his cheeks in the soft breeze. His sculpted lips shaped in a sad smile that's holding back a frown. I hold on to that image for dear life and pray with all my might that I will never forget it. It will be the last memory I have of him.

"Goodbye." I whisper and turn swiftly on my heel and run to the forest of Death. I can't afford to slacken my pace now. If I falter I know I won't able to turn back again. I welcome the darkness and gloom that envelopes me as I rush into the trees. Through the whistling of wind in my ears, I hear a melancholy howl rise into the air behind me.

* * *

**Jeez, sorry this was so fricking long :/ I'm not sure I should be saying this but I just…I don't know I went back and read this and I feel like this wasn't one of the better-written chapters I've done. But then again maybe I'm wrong. **

**Hello everyone. Alright, so let me just say that I honestly didn't really wanna write about Youji and Toboe that much, I really wanted to focus on Toboe and Tsume :( But I brought Youji into this picture, and damn it I was gonna bring him out in a way that I was satisfied with. To be honest (I mean, I'm writing this before I even finish writing the chapter but) I think this chapter will be one of the ones that I'm not so impressed with and will probably not go back to read this chapter to give myself confidence.**

**Anyway, so now for a very important piece of news: Those of you who actually read this will be informed. The next chapter I post for this story will be the final chapter. Don't worry, I know there's still some characters that you probably want to see or there're some questions you want answered or…certain **_**scenes**_ **between Toboe and Tsume that you'd like to see _._ All shall be answered in chap 12. So with that in mind I'm just forewarning you that chap 12 might be quite long…and steamy…and to be honest x-rated so I caution you to read at your own risk. I won't be held responsible if your parents catch you reading something you shouldn't x(**

**In summary: Tune in for the hot, steamy conclusion of My True Identity. See you next time!**

**And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:**

_A few nights ago on 1/4/13 I had this dream that I was in a space shuttle and we were going to outer space. I was all like "Hunh?! What am I doing here? I don't wanna go to outer space! Get me off this thing! Let me out!" because pathetically I'm afraid of outer space Xc But there wasn't any time and we blasted off into the black abyss. And ooooooooooh my god if felt so _WEIRD _floating around with no gravity. It felt like that feeling you get when you're going downhill on a roller coaster and it feels like your stomach is falling up into your throat. I hated it, god it felt weird. But then the astronaught guys turned the gravity back on and I was like 'Thanks…' *angry face* then I decided that "Well, I might as well look around while I'm here" And that's when I realized that on top of this thing being a space craft…it was also a Disney land resort.__The room that I was in before was all white with controls and monitors and had this one, big picture window which was at the front of the space craft so the astronaughts could see where they were flying. But when I stepped out into the hallway there were red plush carpets, and the hallway was long and had a very high ceiling. I walked down to the end of the hallway and came out into this fancy dining hall where everyone was dressed in late Victorian era clothing and were watching a live performance of the Beauty and the Beast. Needless to say I felt underdressed so I decided that I wanted to go see a movie. So I went into the movie theater and I forget what movie we were watching but some bozo decided that it would be funny to turn the gravity off when no one was paying attention. So the next thing you know everyones floating out of their chairs and screaming and sprawling out all over the ceiling and trying to grab on to chairs and other furniture to stop falling up. Then the bastard turned the gravity back on and everyone came crashing back down. Ouch._

**And then I woke up to an ordinary day.**


End file.
